The Price of Fame and Fortune (Hunger Games)

23

Pain. 

It's heavy and intense.

Pressure that somehow resembles fire, is being applied again and again onto my chest. Almost frantic in the way it's applied without rest inbetween. Just as it stops and I think I'll be able to breathe, my throat is attacked by wind that ignites the same level of pain in my lungs. 

And then it sarts again. Only I don't ever remember it stopping. More chest pain, more throat pain. And then I can't take it anymore and I moan. The pain immediatly stops and I'm rolled onto my back by some inhuman force. 

Vomit. It just pours out of me. I feel like I'm choking on it but then all I feel is relief. I open my eyes to be met with angry gorgoues sea green ones. Liam wastes no time before holding his hand in my line of vision. "How many fingers am I holding up?".

I swallowed and tried to focus on it. Honestly, I don't know. "Four and a half". My voice was hoarse to the point I hardly recognised it.

He smirked down at me and ran his hand through his golden wet hair. "Close enough". 

He slumped back onto the sand beside me and I heard him sigh in relief. I felt my eyes flutter shut but jerked awake as Liam lightly slapped my face. He gave me a pointed look. "Don't do that. You need to stay awake, you might be concussed".

I frowned and propped myself up on my elbows. "I'm not concussed. I just passed out".

Drowned. I just totally drowned.

He scoffed. "I found you by the rocks. So, shut it and don't sleep".

 And to think I was just about to thank him for saving my life. Although, maybe I still should as technically he could've left me for dead. I sighed. "Thank you". 

He shook his head at me. "I didn't do it for you".

Great. I frowned. "Okay well, thanks anyways".

His eyes slowly looked back down at me, and he seemed to observe every inch of my face before he gave me a curt nod.

I rested back down making sure not to close my eyes. I could still feel his eyes on me but I refused to meet them. He cleared his throat. "Does Johanna know you can't swim?".

I felt my eyebrows crease together. What an odd question. "Not sure. Probably never occured to her". 

I heard him click his tongue. "Everyone should know how to swim".

The judgment was clear as day and I galred at the rising sun. "Well, not everyone does. Besides, most people in Seven don't know how to swim. It's common".

He suprised me by sitting beside my head and brushing a lose strain of hair behind my ear. "But your not common". 

I opened and closed my mouth before I scoffed. "Don't".

He smirked and rose his eyebrows innocently. "Don't what?".

I rolled my eyes. "Don't flirt with me as if I'm like every other teenage girl that's in love with you".

He tipped his head at me. "But isn't everyone in love with you anyway?". 

I frowned and he gave me a pointed look. I mean if I was to be honest then yes. Apparently, the whole country is in love with us. But I'd never acknowledge that. Especially  not in front of said country. 

And just like that we were back to silence. I hated that he was now all I could look at. He's blocking the sun rise, but I guess I shouldn't be directly looking at the sun anyways. I bit my lip. "So, is this what your district is like?".

He blinked as if he'd forgotten that I'm literally lying beside him. He hummed. "Yeah. Well without the rocks, jungle and door".

Oh so not really?. I nodded. "I like it. The beach anyways. Never seen one before but I guess this technically isn't a real beach".

I saw him shrug. "It's pretty much as close to the real thing as you can get". 

I breathed out a long sigh. "I mean, I like it. But I hate the trees here. Theres no where to hide because the branches aren't close togther. It makes me feel exposed. I want to go to an arena with plenty of trees".  I nodded to myself and I felt Liam's eyes pierce mine.

He looked to the sunset and I noticed that his forehead creased in doubt. "You want to go back to the seventy-fourth arena, you mean".

I nodded and I was suprised that he lightly held my hand. "What would we eat in there?".

I frowned. "We could get syrup with the spial".

He scoffed. "As sweet as that sounds. We can't survive on syrup."

I frowned. "I know that. But, I'd just feel safer there". 

He glared at the ocean. "You're safe here with me. I didn't let you drown did I?".

I slowly shook my head. "No. But I don't like this arena. It's also way too ho-"

BOOM.

I felt his hand instantly tighten on mine. The name Trent rushed through my mind. I felt myself swallow in slight fear. "Who do suppose it was?".

He didn't say anthing for a moment before he muttered out. "I doubt it was him". 

I noticed after saving me Liam is more...protective. Which makes me think he might've thought my mental breakdown might've been a suicide attempt. 

I kinda get it. A girl that can't swim goes over neck deep into the ocean with waves and currents?. Yeah, it doesn't look good. Plus, it wouldn't be the first time someone tried to off themselves in an arena. Only I'm not one of those people. Panem knows I'm not one of those people. Low key crazy? Potentially. But not suicidal, more just an idiot. 

I watched as Liam stretched out his shoulders before turning to me. He wasn't glaring at me so I guess that's progress. "We can search for Trent today if you want. Any arena, you're pick".

Okay, well he definitely thinks it was suicide then. Like Liam Odair would suddenly just be nice and willing to plan the day around what I wanted to do.  I paused before I shook my head at him. "I didn't try to kill myself".

He rubbed the back of his neck and turned towards the ocean. "It's okay if you did. My m-mum she's..".

Oh fuck. I quickly jumped in. "No. I mean it. I was angry and threw my token into the ocean. Only to have a million second thoughts and regret it. I didn't even realise I was in too deep until it was too late". 

I really don't want to have the talk with Liam Odair. The one the whole country is probably waiting for us to have. The talk about what it's really like growing up being their children. What they're really like. It's inevitable but I wanted to avoid it for as long as possible. 

Liam exhaled and I knew he was trying not to think of his mother. I cringed, his mother that I'd reminded him of. A part of me did wonder what it was like being raised by Finnick and Annie Odair. The both are polar opposites from sane to insane. I wondered if that would've been worse then being raised by Johanna Mason.

He cleared his throat and indicated to the door. "We should probably get going. You're right, this arena...we should leave".

And now, just like me. Liam can't stand it here either. Because it reminds him of home, of her. And unlike me I could see it clear as day on his face. Liam Odair loves his mother. There's no doubt or hesitation there. While that's all I feel when I think of mine.

Doubt and hesitation.