Surviving A Dream

Chapter 19- Searching for home

What was she even doing there? Why did she end up here of all places? The hatred towards herself mixed with the questions, making them unbearable. Why is it so hard to control your thoughts? Why is it so hard to- to- ugh forget it. Think of the now, think of the- it won't work. That constant practice of controlling the mind and not overthinking situations gave her the feeling of impending doom. Why does she keep falling down a pit of misery? Why is it so hard to come out? It's not like it's deep, why would she need help if one solid climb could do the job? Why is she even thinking of metaphors for hate? This isn't school!

The next two days were a torture, she didn't try block out the questions. She couldn't be bothered. It was to hard. But Beatrice didn't even try help. Not even a little bit. She kept living her normal life, in silence at home. Enjoying life outside. And every time Beatrice went out, Emma whispered to herself, " C'mon. Don't be lazy and see what she's up to!" and " She is talking about me. 100% it's about me" losing her mind over one little thing.

"Hi... Good morning. You up? Hello?" Emma could hear Beatrice's soft voice through the blanket over her ears. Emma shot up. I went into a dream, in a dream? Not possible, but she's awake now. Maybe in a dream. But awake. "I'm up. I'm up." Emma mumbled. Her brown hair sticking to her exhausted face. Her eyes twinkling to the sun.

"You ok? I have fresh fruit from the garden if you want? We have strawberries, blueberries and ras-"                                                                                                                                                                                           " Strawberries please and, sorry I cut you off." Emma replied, she cut off Beatrice as she didn't really like other fruit. She liked strawberries, lemons and oranges. That's all.                                          " It's fine. Anything else? Dinner is coming late" Beatrice asked, she takes good care of her guests. Treats them like family.                                                                                                                                      "No thanks, I'll live" the conversation was short, Emma's least favourite type. Her stomach was turning. Longing for food. The strawberries sweeter than sugar and as red rubies. Each bite more refreshing than the other. She forgot about any other life. Till she remembered...