Umpteen Disadvantages of Being Awesome

Disadvantage 10 - Sleepless

Disadvantage 10 - As you were all cool and 'awesome' in front of your friends, your anxieties and tensions seep in at night. Making you sleepless.

"Listen to me very clearly, this competition is a big thing and if you can't get that in your head then I am sorry, you don't have to participate in this either. I am not letting anyone ruin the name of Petunia High School." Mrs Hooch says, refraining from ripping my head into shreds.

"Thanks for ruining my mood! Don't call me again if you can't perform well. I am giving you time till tomorrow evening. Perfect the whole thing or I am withdrawing our school's name." She says before turning away.

I have a fair idea of how much Mrs. Hooch is firm on her words. "You can't withdraw our name at the last moment." I say in desperation, a feeble attempt at making up for all that I ruined.

"I can. I do whatever I want and I can." She spits before stomping out of the rehearsal hall.

Alan flops down on the ground with a thud. I don't even understand why doesn't he just tell me off ? Why does he has to be so calm and patient all the time ? Why can't he tell me I am not up to his level of dance. Why don't people just say it the way it is. Why do they have to say it's 'okay' when it's not. Say 'you're doing well' when you're not. Why ? Why deny me a simple motivation to do better ?

"Ala, she won't withdraw. You'll do better, I am telling you." Racheal says before I hold up my hand, signaling her to stop.

I don't want to hear it. Any of it. Three days left and I am still messing up. Not even three, today is already finished. Tomorrow. Regionals.

Forget about the last position, I am faltering in the routine. I am out of sync. At the points we have to do salsa, I am standing feets away from Alan. The parts where we need space for lyrical hip hop, I am bumping into him. No expression. No rhythm. I cannot just ruin this. What is wrong with you Beck. Come on.

I clap my hands together loudly. Feeling the sting and the warmth, I carry on doing it. Few frustrated cries take a leave from my mouth before I can stop them. I give out one last yelp and very suddenly and ungracefully sit down on the ground cross legged, taking my head into my hands.

How can I let all those people down who have been pinning their hopes with me ? Specially Mrs Hooch. She always appreciated my dance, marveled at my techniques and this is a very lousy way to repay her.

"Don't let the muggles get you down." Lize says, putting her hand on my shoulder.

I look up to her. "The last time I checked you were nowhere near the 'p' of 'Potterhead'."

"Yeah" She replies in an obvious tone. "But there are just two Harry Potter references I like. Well duh that's why I know them."

"The other one is ?" I question curiously. My bestfriend has taken to Harry Potter references, I am impressed.

" 'No need to call me sir, professor.' "

I fight back the urge to let the ends of my lips turn upwards. I look at Lize and she beams back at me.

"Hey, I liked that one too." The cute potterhead says. No wait, I mean Alan says.

"Everyone likes that sassiness." Lize replies.

"You get it Ala ? Why we talk to you ? It is just the sassiness." Racheal says, coming forward and standing beside Lize.

"Why are you so wet ? Is it raining or is it just me ?" I say looking at our Ms. Rain or Racheal as we call her.

"What ?" She asks, highly confused.

"Nah nothing. I just felt like saying that." I say shrugging my shoulders.