Wish: A Hamilton Fanfiction

Chapter 21: Part Two

I didn't know how to feel. I felt like this conversation would go terribly. There were only around seven minutes of intermission left and I was spending them sitting in the corner freaking out about nothing.

I knew everything would be fine, but then again, it wouldn't be, right? There was no way this would turn out in my favor. I should have minded my own business, done what I was supposed to do and got out without getting tangled in anything. But here we were, first performance of our three week run, and everything was so messed up. 

The performance was going fine, everyone was slaying it. But I couldn't quite shake Claire's expression.

"Zoey, come on! It's almost time for Act 2 and you have a costume thing still, don't you?" Mariah called as she ran by, reaching out and grabbing my arm. I almost tripped on the edge of my skirt as she pulled me along.

"Mariah! Not that fast!" I exclaimed. She just laughed, her eyes dancing. 

We finally got to where the costumes were kept, thank goodness the green belt was still there. I took it off the shelf and fastened it around the light green bodice of my current costume.

"It's so pretty but I kind of hate this dress," I muttered. Mariah laughed at me. 

"It's not that bad!"

"Easy for you to say!" After Peggy was done making appearances, she had changed back into street clothes because it would be a while before Maria showed up.

"Two minutes until places!" someone shouted.

"Thank you, two!" we all shouted back. I kept my head down while we walked past a group of the ensemble. Noticing how all over the place everyone was, I kept it down the entire time until I got to the wings.

"We still have a little time before places," Mariah whispered, confused.

"Like a minute! And I just want to be...ready," I whispered back. I had no idea how to tell her when she was just finding her own happy ending. She and Carson had a dynamic that seemed impossible for me to ever get. But...every time I saw her, a thousand stars lit up my world. I felt safe with her, but I felt-

"Places everybody!"

"Thank you, places!"

At this point I think we were all used to being on the stage in front of so many people but it was hard to remember what I was supposed to be doing when all this crap was going on around me. Everyone else was in their own ideal world and I had no idea what to do with mine.

Shut up and get your head in the damn game! You just have to finish out this performance and everything will work out how it should. 

Take a Break was definitely one of my favorite songs from Hamilton. It was so exciting to be able to perform it. We just were able to capture the vibe perfectly up there. It seemed like the audience was really enjoying their time. Them being happy made me happy, and I performed better. Since I was performing better, they were probably enjoying everything more. It was an endless loop; one that I finally liked.

In the wings I made sure I caught Mariah's eye to mouth "you got this" to her. She was terrified that one of them would screw something up. I knew neither of them would. After endless rehearsing they were both as ready as they ever would be. And I knew they could be perfectly in character. 

Mariah's first note immediately brought cheers, though the applause quieted down so the number could keep going. When the song was over and they had both done everything to literally the best of their ability you could barely hear anything over the clapping and whistling. She ran off the stage blushing.

"I can't believe that just happened," she whispered once she had made sure her microphone was cut.

"I told you you would do amazing! You seriously have the best voice of anyone here," I told her. Of course, she didn't agree with me.

Quickly I went and changed into the light blue dress that had always reminded me of a nightgown. It was breathtaking to be wearing anything Paul Tazewell had designed.

Even though it was so short, Schuyler Defeated had always caught my attention as one of the better songs. I loved the simplicity, I loved the way it conveyed its message.

Then, of course, all good things had to come to an end. Eliza's time on stage with Philip was about to be unfortunately over.

Putting on the black coat felt like getting ready for my own funeral. Even though Philip's death wasn't Eliza's death and his death had nothing to do with my own personal self, it just...hit different.

I had no idea if I could get up to that emotional level. I couldn't remember the last time I'd cried when something like this happened. I stood in my entrance spot, not taking my eyes off the duel, trying to bring myself up. 

This is the person I care about the most in the world. And he's about to die. 

I did it. I'd never driven myself that far emotionally but I cried during the song. And I had to try very hard not to fully break down during It's Quiet Uptown. As soon as I got backstage I started sobbing, not even paying attention to if my mic was off.

"Hey, it's okay. It's okay Zoey, you're fine," Noelle reassured me. Her hug felt really nice.

"Sorry, I don't even know why I'm crying, it's-" I sniffed.

"It's fine, everything's okay, let's just...tell me about your school back home." We traded meaningless conversation until I had calmed down enough to trade the black coat for a blue bathrobe.

Best of Wives and Best of Women felt completely doable after all that had happened. It wasn't even three hours since the first beats started and it felt like an eternity. So many things had gone on in my head.

Ready to end opening night, I took off the bathrobe to get ready for Who Lives, Who Dies, Who Tells Your Story. I felt like I got the end done well. It was so emotional for everyone to be telling that story just like Eliza wished would happen; I was extremely happy to be able to share it with the audience. 

As quickly as it had started, it was over. Final bows music played and we all filed onto the stage, stepping forward to take our individual bows. The crowd was so loud that I thought I would hear them from a block away.

This was the best night of my life. I was confident enough to make my speech.

"Thank you everyone so much for coming! I think I speak for all of us when I say that this-" I was interrupted by a loud crash coming from the stage door area.

a/n

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