everything i didn't say | jeong yunho

three.

they were both awake, and they had no visitors at that time.

finally.

yunho had been dying to speak to her, but he had been occupied with visitors. meanwhile, he never once saw anyone visit the girl next to him.

just yesterday she happened to wake up and notice him. he wonders if she still remembers him.

it was really hard to tell. her face no longer contained any sort of expressions. she just gave him a blank stare before looking at the ceiling again.

he didn't hear her talk the whole time he was there. she would give weak gestures in response to her doctors and nurses. all she does is wake up, eat, stare at the ceiling and then go back to sleep.

there were times yunho noticed that she had difficulty doing even normal things, like eating. it would take her awhile to finish a meal. and occasionally she would wince because of frequent headaches.

they didn't speak to each other at all, and tonight he wanted to change that. he would be discharged in a few days and he refused to leave before talking to her. even if it's just once, he wants to talk to her again.

he had no idea what exactly it was. was it because he hadn't seen her in 3 years, and now that he has, she's in the worst possible state?

whatever it is, yunho was determined that he wanted to talk to her. there was so many things he wanted to say and ask. but he seem to have difficulty trying to figure out what to say.

eventually, he mustered all his courage as he turned to the side and faced her. the girl was staring at the ceiling but then slowly turned her head towards him.

yunho felt his nerves acting up again the moment their eyes met.

he always fell in love with the way her eyes looked. they were so glossy and reflective, they looked like they hold the entire universe.

and her eyes were often teary too. she had that look in her eyes that someone would have if they are about to cry, but for her it's just how her eyes normally look.

he found it fascinating. he always have. and he remembered falling in love with it again every single day back then.

now the feeling was coming back.

"hey," he finally spoke. he mentally cursed at himself for only being able to say that word. he was nervous as to how she would react, or if she would respond at all. it would be awkward and rather disappointing if she didn't.

"hi," she greets back, a faint smile creeping up her face. that made yunho smile softly to himself. even if it was a small, painful smile, it was still a smile. and he was dying to see that damned smile again.

"i'm yunho," he starts off.

"i know. hi yunho, i'm hanabi," she replied, playing along.

"i know," he smile again.

she chuckled softly to herself as she turns away. he knew that she wasn't good at keeping eye contact for long. she still hasn't changed.

"aren't you going to ask me why i'm here?"

hanabi paused. she didn't ask him, even if she's curious. because she knows that he'll ask her back.

and for some reason she doesn't feel like talking about her condition. they're both in a hospital bed next to each other, which means that he'll have plenty of time to ask her everything.

and part of her was afraid of that.

"you don't have to tell me," she simply shrugs. he sighed.

"i want to."

she looked at him again, only to find his eyes never leaving hers. it's making her heart race, and she hates to admit it.

"you look more matured now," she speaks, changing the subject. yunho seem to understand the situation at hand.

"so you're saying i didn't look mature before? did i look like a baby?"

"no i mean you look grown."

"of course. i'm an adult now. the last time you saw me i was a teenager," he laughed. she laughed along.

he was glad that he could crack a laugh out of her. she didn't display any positive emotions the whole time they were there.

"i guess you're right."

"you look matured too."

"thanks," she simply says.

it grew quiet. neither of them knew what to say to each other, even though they had a lot to say.

she was looking around, trying to find the window. then she found the glass window at the end of the room.

he knew exactly what she was searching for. she was always obsessed with the night sky, and how the moon looks like. even though he thought that the sky and the moon would look the same every night, she seemed to never get tired of it. it was something about the way she admires the moon and stars so much that he grew attracted to it. there was even a point of time where he couldn't look at the night sky without thinking of her.

she was passionate about a lot of things, and he loved how excited she gets when she talks about those things. she would then have to apologise for talking too much.

it was little things like that which made his heart ache. he was convinced that he could give her the world and so much more.

when she couldn't see the moon from where she was, she sighed and closed her eyes. then she opened them back again and looked at him.

"goodnight. you should get some rest too," she smiles. he nods in response.

"goodnight. sleep well," he returned the smile. she closed her eyes and rested.

yunho was happy that he even got the chance to speak to her. even if it was for a brief moment, he felt over the moon. he wished for more opportunities to come for him to talk to her again before he could go home.