Insatiable Habits

Stay

You back into the hotel room, still holding Natasha tight in your arms. The tears do not cease as you lower her onto your makeshift 'bed' on the couch, in fear of staining her bed with blood. You place a towel on the back of her head and get to work clotting the bleeding. You strip her layers carefully, while making sure to drip water into her mouth periodically so that her throat isn't dry. As you stitch up some wounds on her stomach and tape the rest shut, you feel her jerk at the pain of the disinfectant. She groans and swipes your arms away from her.
"No, Natasha it's me, baby, it's me, Y/N."
You hold her face as she comes round, taking the towel from her head, concerned that she may be alarmed by the amount of blood. You kiss her forehead as her eyes flutter open, gaining full consciousness. You lower your head into her, attempting to hide your tears.
"Oh my god, Natasha you fucking scared me, you really fucking scared me. Don't you ever do that again, oh my god, baby I was so afraid you were gone."
Natasha hesitantly lifted her hand to the back of your head, holding you in her neck as you wept with relief. She was as equally confused as you. You're not sure why you care this much, nor is she, yet you both allow it. You both exist in this moment of vulnerability, Natasha holding your fearfully emotional head while you sob into the crook of her neck - thankful that she is alive even though just days ago, you had sworn her an enemy of yours.

When you finally lifted your head, she met your gaze, wide eyed and helpless.
'I'll give you some of my clothes." you say as you excuse yourself from her side.
When you return with your loose fitting clothing, she is sat up on the edge of the couch, waiting.
"Did you do this ?" she questions, fingers running over her fresh stitches. You nod as you help her up, pulling yet another huge jumper of yours over her head and letting it fall over the rest of her upper body.
"Y/N, I can get the-"
"No, you cant. Let me help, Nat."
As you pulled the suit down over her waist and legs she lifted them each individually to help.
"So, no more calling me baby anymore ? Back to Nat it is."
You winced at the fact she had heard you.
You helped her sit back down before ignoring her question and stating that she should probably just stay in underwear to help her wounds breathe.
"Okay baby." came her reply.
Although you wanted to address this, so bad, you decided against it.
"We'll get you to bed then, Nat" She looked saddened by your ignorance of her questioning, but took your hand anyways and allowed you to wrap your arm round her waist and escort her to the bedroom.
You lifted her into bed and pulled the covers over her body.
"Wanda's coming tomorrow. Just a check in after what happened. If you're not up, I'll talk to her."
Natasha didn't respond. She just looked at you in the dim light, little expression painting her face.
"Okay, Nat. If you need anything just shout."
As you turn your back to her, she touches your hand and holds onto your thumb. You stop and turn back slowly to look at her.
"Could you stay ?" came her weak voice, asking the same question you had asked in the past. You wondered if you should give the same answer she gave you. You wondered if she even remembered.
She tightened her grip on your thumb and pulled you closer, so that she could intertwine her remaining fingers with yours.
"Why, Nat ? You seemed pretty irritated by the whole bed situation before."
You expected an answer that would no doubt quell your feelings, she most likely just needs you next to her incase she is thirsty in the night or bursts a stitch.
"I don't usually sleep well, Y/N."
Silence fills the room. An ill-hidden confused look on your face tells Natasha that she should elaborate.
"The plane journey here was the best sleep I've had in months, and I'd be lying if I told you it wasn't because I was in your arms."
You tightened your fingers round her hand reassuringly.
"So please, Y/N, stay."