Insatiable Habits

Time Heist

A loud bang rippled through the compound, waking you, Natasha and Wanda simultaneously.
"What the fuck was that ?"
You sat up first, frantically dressing yourself, grabbing a small knife from the corner drawer before speeding out the room. Moments later, the two red heads followed. You scaled the stairwell warily as you approached a faint reverberation coming from Tony's office - intertwined between the conversing voices of Steve and the others. You let your guard down once noticing laughter between the low rumble. Stepping into the room, you caught the eye of Tony, who was grinning widely at Steve, Bruce embracing him in a bear hug.
"It worked." came his statement, bluntly.
You stood confused by the side of Wanda and Natasha, who were as equally perplexed as yourself.
"Time travel in the quantum realm. An inverted Möbius strip model. We might be able to fix this."
Before the reality had set in, Scott extended on Tony's speech.
"We have one shot. One round, no do-overs. We don't have enough Pym Particles to try again."
You nodded slowly, accepting the situation.
"Peter...?" you flashed a questioning glare at Tony.
He shook his head, the corners of his mouth upturned as Natasha leant into your shoulder.
"Get some sleep, kid. We go in the morning."
You ran to Tony, pulling him into a tight hug as you turn, gesturing for Steve to join. After slight hesitation he joins you - Wanda, Natasha and Bruce adding them self to the embrace with Scott joining last. You shared a moment with one another, appreciative of this momentary quiet, aware of tomorrow's noise.

"You need to sleep."
Natasha pulled you back under the covers, Wanda already dozing against your shoulder.
You had spent the best part of an hour vigorously tapping your foot, hundreds of scenarios rushing through your brain as you pondered the morning's events.
"The quantum realm tires you out. Please, get some sleep."
Reluctantly you rolled over, allowing Natasha to take you under her arm as she laced her fingers through your hair. You drifted quickly returning to the tranquility of the woman's embrace.

Natasha woke you with a gentle nudge, an added kiss to the forehead helping you come round.
"God, I'm nervous."
You half yawned the sentence as you extended your arms above your head, Wanda and Natasha already changing outfit. You were immediately displeased at the sight of them, ready to risk their life yet again. You wished that perhaps you hadn't allowed yourself to love Natasha. You wished now that Wanda hadn't gotten so close to you too. Maybe it would make this easier. Maybe, if you didn't love anyone the way you did, the pain of the job wouldn't be so bad.

But unfortunately, that was not the reality.

Wanda was hearing your thoughts. You could tell by the sympathetic look that swathed her face. She took Natasha's hand and crossed the room to you, kneeling before you as Natasha sat next to you on the bed. Your head fell into your hands as Wanda ran her fingers up and down your thighs. Natasha, slightly confused due to her inability to read minds, rested her head on your shoulder - her arm caressing your waist.
"You don't need to worry about us, Y/N."
Wanda's Sokovian accent was relatively stronger than usual, you had noticed. Probably due to her time predominantly spent with you. She only had your accent influence.
"We can take care of ourselves."
Natasha's voice was raspy from the night before, still thick with sleep as she leant up and kissed your cheek. You nodded, wiping a quick tear from the corner of your eye before standing, stripping and gearing up - your back facing them the entire time. You couldn't handle their faces - the love in the room. It hurt like no other.
You zipped the last of your suit, running your fingers gently over the widow symbol while turning to see Wanda's repairments on the back. The faint remnants of your bloody stitches speckled across the threads. Natasha held you from behind, her black suit a stark contrast to your white. Wanda moved to open the door as Natasha pressed her forehead into your back.
"No leaving each other this time. I mean it too."
You pulled her forward, holding her in your arms before kissing her lips softly - tucking a red strand behind her ear.
"I think you'll find you left me, thanks."
She smirked mildly before letting you turn to leave the room alongside Wanda, smacking your ass playfully as you stepped outside.

The journey downstairs harboured no conversation. Perhaps it was your nerves, paired with the anticipation of events. Though you felt prepared for the mission, you couldn't imagine losing Natasha for a second time. You considered asking her to stay behind, yet decided against it, aware that she'd simply decline your request. Everyone else was up and ready, Tony and Steve already suited up in what looked like brand new attire - a red and white, skin tight outfit that flashed the original Avengers symbol on its pocket, paired with a matching helmet. Steve was speaking to Bruce, chewing the bites of an apple in between words as Tony comforted Pepper, her eyes bloodied with fear.
"You all set, doll ?"
Bucky approached you from behind, handing you and Natasha the folded outfit. He pulled you into his shoulder, his signature scent wrapping itself round you as he sported his usual burgundy sweater - the first two buttons undone.
"Where's your suit ?"
"He cant come." Steve, having finished his previous conversation, answers your question as he stands next to Natasha. Your girlfriend leaning against him softly.
"He wasn't in the timeline for where...or when we're going." 
Bucky nodded, continuing on from Steve.
"Yep. I was still in the deep Russian country with Hydra coursing through my veins. If I went back and was seen, it'd mess with the timeline."
You shook your head, humming to show your understanding. Steve wrapped his arm round Bucky, pulling him into a tight hug, muttering something into his ear. As he did this, you noticed Pepper conversing with Wanda - most likely explaining why Wanda wouldn't be able to travel with the team too. You took this opportunity to share a moment with just Natasha.
"You should really stay and keep James company y'know."
You slung your arms round her neck, allowing them to rest there as you faced her. She raised her brow at your comment, smirking as she replied.
"I still don't like that you're the only one who calls him James. Maybe you should be the one to stay since you two are on a first name basis, huh ?"
You grinned widely, a small huff leaving your mouth as you leaned in, pressing your lips to hers gently.
"I guess we're both going then." She spoke softly into your mouth. You nodded while leaning in for another.

You excused yourself with Natasha as you turned the corner into a spare room, where you were readying yourself to change into the suits. You removed your white widow suit slowly, basking in the little time you had remaining in the relative normality. You watched as Natasha moved in on you, standing just inches away. She plunged to her knees before you, dragging the lower half of your catsuit down, helping you step out of it. As she pushed it aside, she kissed up your body, right from your knee, peppering gentle pecks along your thighs, stomach, chest, neck - eventually reaching your lips where she merged her lips with yours intensely. You held her there for a moment before pulling away, a wave of dejection washing over you.
"Natasha, I can't lose you again."
You pressed your forehead against hers as she held your face in her hands.
"You won't."
"You don't know that."
Your cheeks became hot with worry as you were reminded of the loss.
"I told you to wait for me, right ? And I came back. I'm here now, you never lost me, baby. I'm right here."
She stroked your cheeks tenderly as you backed into a chair, slouching in it defeatedly. Her velvet touch and your position beneath her was a direct ode to the first time Natasha had been vulnerable with you. The parallel between your return from Budapest with Clint and the present moment was undeniable. You could almost feel Natasha wiping your wounds dry. It was a near full circle moment in your relationship.

She ushered you up in silence, as you helped one another into the suits, a melancholy fog plaguing the air. You hung onto Natasha's touch, your fingers intertwined with hers as you made your way back to the team - who were now wholly set. Pepper rushed over to you, taking you in her arms as Natasha bid her goodbye's to the others - lingering slightly round Wanda.
"You be careful, please."
Her voice was thick with concern, her lip trembling as she looked at you. The woman's eyes were swollen, the whites turned red as she failed to control her emotion. She stepped aside, pushing hair behind your ear as Wanda approached you. She stood before you, fidgeting with her rings, as she does. Her eyes were glued to the floor as she swayed on her feet.
"I wish I could come."
Her voice was faint and shaky.
You stepped into a hug, pulling her arms apart and forcing them round your waist. You kissed her forehead as she sniffled quietly beneath your chin.
"You know I wouldn't have let you."
She let out a breathy giggle, squeezing you tighter than before.
"You're not allowed to get hurt. Don't let Natasha get hurt either though. Please - I mean - I ..." she trailed off in her own shortness of breath.
"Just come back. Please."
You held her face in your hands, her arms still tightly bundled round your mid section.
"I will. I promise."