What Should I do? | Shawn Hunter

iv. Stupid Plans

"I'M TELLING YOU Hunter this plan will never work" Kardern exclaimed with a roll of his eyes as he was pushed inside of Cory Matthew's bedroom once again, after already trying to escape once before only to be caught by Shawn Hunter and pulled back towards the room. Honestly, he didn't know how he ended up in their schemes and wanted a way out of it but he always found a way to be planted right in the middle of the chaos and stupid plans which almost never work because they were eleven-year-olds, not geniuses

"Trust me a little would ya Osborn? I know what I'm doing"

"I'm not sure you ever know what you're doing Hunter"

"And you do? Darling just because you read books and have a lot of knowledge inside that pretty little head of yours it doesn't mean your better than me" Shawn said pulling Kardern into his side and Kardern felt something in his chest, he didn't know what it was and he probably wouldn't for a long while

But he remembered the feeling he had read about 

And knew he wanted to feel it again

Pushing whatever he felt to the back of his mind, he looked up at Shawn as he let the boy drag him back to Cory's room and couldn't help the little dig that rose up his throat "Apparently it does since I know that this plan won't work"

"There may be hope for yet you Osborn"

"I doubt it" Kardern muttered softly and went to sit on one of the beds, he really didn't know how he ended up here but apparently Cory's parents trusted Kardern a lot more than the likes of his other friends (if you could even call Kardern and Cory friends -- after all the boy didn't have many friends on account of being weird and well his temper)

"But Kardern is a nerd and I don't see any of you asking him to change" Minkus points out after a minute and his words start up a fire that was roaring in Kardern's gut, making him almost go blind with the rage he was feeling and he knew if he didn't get control of his feelings soon. Someone was going to end up with a black eye. It wasn't going to be him.

"Osborn doesn't need to change" Shawn jumped in, cuffing Minkus on the back of the head and the poor boy scowled at Shawn as he rubbed the back of his head "I like Osborn just the way he is"

"Still maybe I like the way I am!"

And then Kardern watched silently as the three other boys tried to talk Minkus out of doing the Geography competition and he couldn't say anything -- he wouldn't, Shawn had begged him not to and he wasn't about to argue, Shawn had literally been the only person since he was eight that he had let him past the walls that he had built up since before he could remember, and while he didn't let down all his walls and probably never would. Shawn in a way had managed to become his friend. 

But either way, he knew this plan wasn't going to work.

* * * * *

Just like he had predicted the plan fell apart pretty quick 

Cory had managed to get to the Geography competition and Kardern would applaud him for that but he had quickly realised that he wasn't the smartest person in the room and why would he? They were just eleven years old, kids just learning their way in the world. No way near adults but not wanting to be treated like kids

Kardern sometimes wishes he could just be a kid again

But kids like Kardern and Shawn had to grow up pretty quickly while kids like Cory and Minkus had time to learn, be kids and grow. Never fearing if they had enough food for the week, knowing that their parents would never let them go hungry, and that's also why Kardern likes to read books, they were his escape from reality. He could build castles and lands from words, he could build a whole world from the images he conjures up in his mind, daggers, balls, love interests, wounds, spy books and swords along with pirates was his safety net.

The real world was cruel, books were not. It was a stupid sentiment, Kardern believed because he has his heart broken loads of times reading a book more than he had in the real world. How could someone say that a book can't break you into a million pieces before putting you back together?

Anyone who ever said that had clearly never read a book 

Although it is often theorised that when you finished a book -- that's it, the characters have no more life to them and no more story to tell and then you start to feel a heavyweight in your chest that you can never once read more about the characters that you loved so deeply, that you rooted for with everything in you and that you despised. Sure you can reread their journey but it's just the same words stained on a blank page, forever the same and forever unchanging

But Karden didn't believe that no he believed that every character that he has ever read, ever loved, ever cried over, ever daydreamed about meeting were real no matter how many people said that it was just a book. Pages flung together with glue and ink that didn't mean the characters didn't exist anymore, no their lives simply bled through the pages of the book existing in parrel to reality and they would always be there for her when she needed to look to them for hope, guidance, inspiration, a shoulder to cry on. They would always be there for him.

Unlike real people, they never let him down.

"Kardern!" Cory shouted, shattering the world that he had built up for himself and he sighed, looking over to the boy and Cory came to sit next to him. "I just want to say thank you for trying to help me win the competition. I know nothing came of it but I want to know your a really good friend"

"I'm your friend?"

"Of course" Cory smiled "Shawn seems to be your friend and he's usually a good judge of character even though he likes to think he isn't. He's reckless sure but he usually surrounds himself with good people, at least that's what I think, so you are a good person at least in Shawn's book"

"I think I can manage that"

"Good because any friend of Shawn's is a friend of mine and I take care of my friends"