Romie Adler's Musical Guide

Chapter 34: "A Beautiful Mess" - Jason Mraz

Lyrics:

You've got the best of both worlds
You're the kind of girl who can take down a man,
And lift him back up again
You are strong but you're needy,
Humble but you're greedy
Based on your body language,
Your shouted cursive I've been reading
You're style is quite selective,
Though your mind is rather reckless
Well I guess it just suggests
That this is just what happiness is

Hey, what
A BEAUTIFUL MESS
This is
It's like picking up trash in dresses
Well it kind of hurts when the kind of words you write
Kind of turn themselves into knives
And don't mind my nerve you can call it fiction
Cause I like being submerged in your contradictions dear
Cause here we are, here we are

Although you were biased I love your advice
Your comebacks they're quick
And probably have to do with your insecurities
There's no shame in being crazy,
Depending on how you take these
Words that paraphrasing this relationship we're staging

And it's
A BEAUTIFUL MESS
Yes it is
It's like we are picking up trash in dresses
Well it kind of hurts when the kind of words you say
Kind of turn themselves into blades
And the kind and courteous is a life I've heard
But it's nice to say that we played in the dirt
Cause here, here we are, Here we are
We're still here

And what
A BEAUTIFUL MESS
This is
It's like taking a guess when the only answer is yes
And through timeless words in priceless pictures
We'll fly like birds not of this earth
And tides they turn and hearts disfigure
But that's no concern when we're wounded together
And we tore our dresses and stained our shirts
But it's nice today, oh the wait was so worth it

**********

       'Fuck! What did I just do?' I said to myself when I woke up the next morning. I got fuck, fucked things up last night, and my best guy friend is naked and asleep in my bed right now. I remember everything that happened last night, it was the most amazing thing to happen to me in a very long time; it was everything I hoped for, the wait was so worth it. But now, I'm left with the morning after consequences.
       I just had sex with Jax. Not only is he my best friend, but he's my family, and we work together. I just potentially ruined anything great we could've ever had. Jax has a girlfriend, I know that she's the spawn of Satan, but still I know what it feels like to be cheated on. Did I just become the other woman last night?
       As I laid there naked under my bed sheets with Jax passed out next to me, I contemplated what the fuck I was going to do. Should I get up? I don't want to wake him up, and have to face him, I knew I would have to eventually, but it's too soon. I don't even know what he will say, how he feels, or even if he remembers what we did last night.

       My cellphone potentially ruined my plan to sneak around Jax, as it began to beeped and vibrated loudly on the nightstand next to me. I quickly picked it up to stop the ringing, and noticed it was Charlie texting me. She said she was in town, had some free time, and wondered if I wanted to have a late brunch. I replied back with a yes in all caps, I wanted any kind of excuse to escape confrontation with Jax this morning.
       As quietly as I could, I climbed out of the bed, and tip toed over to the bathroom. I needed to take a shower to wash all this quilt off of me, especially before I go to have brunch with my good friend that I haven't seen in months. Charlie is in for a treat with this twist in the beautiful mess of the story called 'my life.'
       I slowly turned on the shower faucet, because I didn't want to make too much noise, then I realized it was useless at this point. I got in the shower to cleanse myself, but that's not what I felt was happening. As the warm shower water trickled down my body, I began to envision every spot that Jax's roughly soft hands touched me last night. When I tasted the water on my lips, it was like I could taste Jax's kiss on mine all over again. It made me feel intense pleasure just like how I felt last night when it was happening.
       I bite my bottom lips, and reminded myself where I was. Last night wasn't something to reminisce about, it was a drunken mistake. It was a one time thing that should've never happened in the first place.
       I just can't seem to break my pattern of sleeping with guys, when there's no possibility of a relationship. Now I dragged Jax into this, and for that I am truly sorry to him. I am not going to make the same after sex mistake with Jax, as I did with Myles.
        It's better to end it long before either party develops some sort of attachment. Jax was too important to me, more like his family was way too important, for Jax and I to continue anything after last night. I have the worst track record when it comes to relationships of the romantic kind, so I don't need to ruin things with Jax any further. I just hope he understands?