Let Me Be Me {Completed}

Chapter 39

-Quinn pov-
I honestly have never felt so alone. Everything with Beth doesn't even compare to this. I at least had some people who would talk to me. Well I have someone who is talking to me.

I know it was dumb to let them in though. I was upset and on walk with Beth when they showed up. We talked and they made me feel good. I know it's probably leading to something bad though.

I just want a friend right now. Sadly they are doing that for me. Which is what brings me under the bleachers today. Smoking like I haven't done since the summer.

"You may need to slow down" I glare and they put up their hands with a smirk "You have almost gone through a whole carton and you will smell like it"

"Why I brought gum Noah" I sigh and pull out a fresh cigarette "I also have perfume and mouth wash in my locker"

"So you have been blackballed by your girlfriends?" I nod and he shakes his head "It not right! You did nothing but be loyal for them and follow what Santana wanted! They don't understand you Quinn"

"Dont trash them" I take a drag and then sigh "This isn't working"

"Why I got the good stuff" I watch him pull out a big blunt "If you want"

I look around then nod "Whatever takes the pain away" He hands it to me and I light it "Here's to numbness"

I put it to my mouth and take it in. I cough a bit but it even on the third smoke. I feel the euphoria wash over me and smile. This feels so freaking good!

Fuck going back to class.

-Time skip-
"Hey what's the time?" Noah lazily picks up his phone and goes wide eyed "What?"

"You missed the whole day" He starts laughing "It's four man"

"Nice" I stand up and start to walk toward the opening "This was a nice escape"

"To bad there isn't an escape from this" I feel my heart drop as I turn to see a angry trio of my girlfriends "Car! NOW!"

"Hey" Noah stumbles up and stands beside me "Fuck you! You ruined everyone's life enough! Rachel was better of without! McKinley was better off without you! You don't deserve Beth! Why don't you give her back to Quinn and give my rights back!"

Shelby's face is unreadable "Is that how you feel?" I try to answer but I have cottonmouth "I'll see you all later"

"Way to go Quinn" Brittany shakes her head as tears fall "Way to go"

"Come on" Santana grabs Brittanys hand "Let's go"

I watch them go and feel my tears falling. I try to yell but can't. I start to walk but stumble and almost fall. I feel a hand on my wrist and turn.

"They aren't worth it" Noah smiles "Why don't you come home with me?"

I rip my arm away and stumble out from the bleachers. I try to catch the car but it's gone. Way to fuck up Quinn. Why can't Quinn do anything right?!

I'm not Quinn though. Quinn has always had the wrong perspective on life. Quinn was made to be the perfect daddy's girl. I am not my fathers daughter.

I start my way home with a determine mindset. I'm gonna fix this as me. The real me that's inside this mess. The one hiding behind Quinn Fabray.

It's time for Lucy to have her second shot.

-Time skip-
When I finally get home I have gotten some saliva back. I slowly open the door and step inside. There's a strong lack of baby sounds right now. I finally hear familiar sniffles and sobs.