Riordanverse Headcanons

My notes on the pjo movies

•That Zeus and Poseidon scene never happened
•Poseidon never met Percy as a baby

•Why is he under water like that?
•He doesn't look twelve
•Grover? The fuck?

•Mrs. Dodds was a math teacher, not and english substitute
•Percy didn't go home after school, it was a boarding school
•Gabe actually has a job, surprisingly

•Mr. Bruner asked a different question
•Where the fuck is Nancy? And didn't Mrs Dodds talk to Percy after the fountain scene? I was looking forward to that🥺
•Grover wasn't there
•Huh, Percy didn't give the pen back!
•Grover found Percy at a beach house after Percy ditched him, not whatever shit is going on

•Did the minotaur just throw a fucking cow?
•Percy carried Grover to camp, not the other way around
•Where is Annabeth?? She needs to tell Percy he drools in his sleep!
•She was the one to show him around camp, not Grover
•Chiron is a white stallion, now brown, and he's supposed to be the only centaur at camp
•Where the fuck are Clarisse and Dionysus, i need my bathroom scene
•No one knew about Percy being the son of Poseidon until AFTER capture the flag
•There was so much wrong with the cabins

•Luke is NOT camp leader! What the fuck?
•Aren't Percy and Annabeth supposed to be on the same team?
•She wasn't supposed to kick his ass like that
•Why does Anakalusmos look so fake?
•Percy never got the flag, he was supposed to be the distraction
•Where's the hellhound?
•Hades? WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK?!

•Didn't Chiron tell them to go to the underworld?
•Where's the oracle?
•ITS SUPPOSED TO BE A QUEST NOT A SNEAK OUT!!

•Are those video games?
•The pearls were not Persephone's, didn't she like Hades?

This isn't even half way through and i'm having a mental breakdown😭

•Luke didn't give Percy a shield
•They didn't know they were going to Aunty Em's
•What's with this pearl scavenger hunt?
•I screamed when I saw the rats
•Splitting up????
•A mortal? Why is she there?
•Isn't Medusa supposed to be ugly?
•Why the fuck does he have a phone?
•Where did the truck come from?
•I almost puked when he tossed the head
•Doesn't Percy send the head to Olympus?

•Percy CANNOT heal with water!
•What's with the pool scene?
•Is there no such thing as the mist here? That cleaning lady shouldn't have been able to see the head

•Wait, was Annabeth in the boys bathroom?
•ANNABETH!!! THOSE ARE WORKING CLASS AMERICANS!!
•Grover didn't wear the flying shoes?
•The hydra didn't show up til the Sea of Monsters, why is it in The Lightning Thief?
•When did Annabeth get a bow?
•EW!! HE KISSED HER HEAD

•No Ares? No water park?

•THATS A WHOLE FUCKING AMUSEMENT PARK!
•What's with the flowers?
•Okay, Grover can dance
•STOP EATING THE FLOWERS!!!!!
•Where's the Elvis kid?
•The fuck is a lotus eater?

•Excuse you, the Underworld is NOT in Hollywood!
•Charon wore a Italian suit in the books, not a creepy ass robe, or at least not until the elevator
•Is the boat flying or something?
•Isn't Charon gonna talk about his raise?
•Cerberus? The gates and all that shit? Where is everything??
•Persephone doesn't hate the Underworld like this? She actually fell in love with Hades
•Why does Hades have that accent?
•Oh shit, the shield, wait, THATS NOT HOW IT GOES!!! IT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE A MAGIC BACKPACK
•Did she really just use the bolt on Hades?

•Did they seriously just leave Grover?? Sally wouldn't allow that!
•Luke? At Olympus? He never said that he was the lightning thief.
•Annabeth wouldn't be able to fight Luke like that
•Sons of Poseidon shouldn't fly that high
•A water trident????

•Mortals can't go to Olympus, Sally get off the elevator
•Those thrones are pathetic
•I really wish I could see Poseidon in his fishing outfit thing

•She didn't turn Gabe to stone?

•Grover didn't get his searchers license????
•I thought she was going to kiss him, I am so happy she didn't

that was horrible, i am NOT watching sea of monsters

end notes:
i did not like this sally
where is the scorpion scene

last one:

JUST WHY???