Chasing Dreams (A Harry Potter Marauder fanfiction)

What Happened To You?

"What happened to you?" Sirius exclaims in surprise. "None of your business." I reply smoothly. He and James share a look of confusion before turning back to me- they seem to have forgotten I'm still mad at them. "What? You.. But.. Really? You're.. C'mon, Skye, you're not still upset about last year, are you?" Sirius asks me, shocked. I raise my eyebrows and keep my arms folded, glaring at them. "Yes. I am." I answer calmly. Lily's eyes flicker between me, Sirius and James as she seats herself opposite me. "Aw, that was last year! You can't still be annoyed!" James exclaims. "I can and I am. Now what-" I turn fiercely to them, "do you want?" Sirius raises his eyebrows. "What did you do to your hair?" He asks. I sigh and look at Lily. The expectant look on her face makes me see that she wants to know too. I guess I can't really blame them- my hair has changed a lot. It's usual long white blonde is still there, wavy and thick, only the bottoms now fade from the cold icy colour that complements my eyes to a honey gold, then finally out to a deep, fiery red. It happened over the summer, when.. Never mind about that actually. The white used to match my pale skin but I purposefully tanned over the summer, making the red less obnoxious, although the blonde at the top of my hair is still the colour I love. "I didn't DO anything! It happened by itself." I find myself telling them, subconsciously running a hand through the waves. "It's amazing, Skye. It really suits you." Lily smiles. I grin at her before turning back to the boys. "Problem?" I ask simply. From the looks on their faces it seems that they can't believe I'm still holding a grudge. Remus steps forward, gives me and awkward smile, and leads the other two away, Peter following.
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"I'm going to the bathroom, I'll be back in a minute." I smile at Lily, who nods as she pulls open a book. I hum quietly and flip my hair over one shoulder as I walk. First years stare as I walk past them, their eyes wide. I glare back at them and pull my brown leather jacket tighter around myself. The material is soft and comforting, reminding me of my new image. The new me, I guess. When I found out my mother died there was only so long before Hogwarts began again, but this time I was ready. I had had enough of Sirius Black and his ability to make my stomach flutter, make the tears fall from my eyes at the snap of his fingers. I was sick of boys and not knowing wether or not I liked them. I was done with how I was never sure wether or not I loved Sirius. I had come to the conclusion that Sirius didn't love me, because he wouldn't have treated me the way he had if he did love me. I didn't love him. If I had ever thought I had, I was wrong. And as for my family, well, they didn't love me, at all. If they had, they wouldn't have blamed me for my mothers death. They wouldn't had shunned me because I was magic. They didn't love me. Sirius didn't love me. And I didn't love anyone. I didn't need anyone. And that was how, alone in my room with the Beatles playing loudly, I came to the conspiring that love just didn't exist. Not for me, not for anyone. It was an illusion, a fake idea created by lonely people who couldn't rely on themselves. But I could rely on myself- I depend on me now. With that thought clear in my mind, I pulled up my soft leather jacket and smudged my dark make up, hoping to improve my scary look, and walked back to the carriage.