Thats Not Me

Chapter 14

shoto's pov

we got to school and we got to the classroom we were the first ones here. so I pulled out the calander and I marked off the first 2 days.

kat smiling at me cutely, as mr aizawa came in and he saw us, he came over and sat next to us.

hey boys did you have fun this weekend?

yeah we did it was alot of fun, we went on a date and watched movies and just laid in bed together. i told him.

so what did he get you at the mall that was a surprise?

I closed the calander and I showed him, he got me a count down calander.

wow that's amazing sho, I'm sure time will fly by in no time with this.

I just nodded soon the rest of the class came in.

I hid the calander in my bag, as the lesson began.

6 hours later

the day was coming to an end. and I wasn't really focusing.

once the final bell rang I grabbed my bag and we headed back to the dorms.

I wasnt feeling my self right now my dysphoria was bothering me pretty bad, I got to my room and I changed into a pair of shorts and my big hoodie, I climbed into my bed and i curled up as I hugged the bear he got me. a few minutes later i heard my door open and I felt a hand rub my back, I rolled over and I buried my face into his chest as he held me.

is it bad again babe? I just nodded he laid down next to me and let me curl up to him. he softly rocked me. I'm sorry baby I know this is hard for you but I'm right here with you I wont let you go, he whispered to me.

I nodded as he wrapped his arms around me, as I cuddled closer to him.

there was a knock on the door, and it soon cracked open.

hey I noticed you weren't acting yourself earlier, I wanted to make sure your okay, mr aizawa said.

when he saw me he shut the door and he came over to me.

its bad for him right now kat said. i have something that might be able to help ill be right back he said as he walked out of the room.

a few minutes later he came back in with a big fluffy blanket.

wrap up in this and trust me you'll feel better. he said as he handed me the blanket.

I sat up and I wrapped the blanket around me as i pulled my legs up and I felt a little better.

I looked up at him and he sat down next to me.

you feel better sho? he asked

a little, but its not gone, I want it gone, I said softly

i know you want this feeling gone, but that's something that will take a long time it may never happen, ive, been 6 years pre op and I still have fits of dysphoria sometime, they arnt as bad as they used to be, but that's just a part of who we are, some people get the luxury of losing the dysphoria after their surgery, but i can tell you after my surgery, it became more livable. these next 6 months will go by in no time and you can feel free. he said.

thanks, dad, I said softly.

i didn't realize I had said that so I looked up and i saw him with wide eyes.

im sorry I-

sho it fine remember we talked about this, I don't mind if you call me that your my son now, I actually like it when you call me that, he said as he pulled me into a hug I wrapped my arms around him. he pulled away and ruffled my hair. you just call me if you need anything. i nodded as I cuddled up with the blanket.

kat turned the tv on for me and he wrapped an arm around my waist and pulled me down to lay with him.

i turned to face him and I placed my hand on his face as he leaned down and kissed me sweetly.

I still wasn't feeling up to energy so I let myself fall asleep in his arms.

(A/N this will just be a filler chapter I have a time lapse coming up