falling for her crush || billie eilish

twenty two.

- MEGAN'S POV -

I cannot lose her. After losing my dad, I thought I was never going to get over it, that my life was going to be black forever. That was until Billie came into my life. Nora made it brighter, too, but Billie? She was the little push that made me realize that life isn't as dark as I thought it was. That it is worth living, because she is there. I already lost Nora, I think. So, I can't, under any circumstances, lose her, too. I just can't.

I get out of the car, run into the hospital and go to the place Maggie said she'd be. Please, please, please, let her be okay. Don't take her away from me, too. I arrive at the place Maggie told me about, looking around in panic and out of breath. "Megan." I turn around and see Maggie sitting on one of the chairs in the waiting room.

"Maggie, hi." I walk toward her as she opens her arms for a hug. I wrap my arms around her, tears falling down my face. "I–is she okay?"

She pulls away again and looks at me, her hands cupping my face. "She is." I sigh out of relieve, the weight that I've been carrying with me ever since Maggie called me finally falling off my shoulders. "She just woke up."

"What did they do to her?"

"She had a surgery because of a broken leg. The doctors said she has been lucky. It was a pretty heavy car crash, but her body is fine. Apart from the broken leg." She smiles, wiping the tears from my face. "Go to her. I'm sure she's happy to see you."

I look at the door she points at, taking a deep breath before going in. I then slowly open the door and I see her, laying in a hospital bed but still managing to look like the beautiful girl she is. I close the door behind me and when I turn around, my eyes meet hers. A small smile appears on her face. We just stare at each other for a while before I run up to her and wrap my arms around her, my head resting on her chest. "Jesus christ, Billie." I pull away again, looking into her beautiful eyes. "I thought I lost you."

She places her hand on my cheek, rubbing it softly. "I told you I'd never leave."

I sigh sadly, looking down. "Billie... I'm sorry." I look back at her. "I shouldn't have left you like that the day of the party. That wasn't fair at all. It's not your fault, I know that. I–"

"It's not your fault either." She lifts up her eyebrows while smiling softly. "Stop blaming yourself for things you can't control."

"Billie–"

"Stop. Can we just... hug for a while?"

I smile, wrapping my arms around her again. "Are you okay?"

"I am now that you're here."

We just sit there for a while, holding each other closely. Thank god she's still here. The thought of not having her around anymore creeps me out on a whole other level. She's my safe place, you know? I was doing fine without her, until I saw her at that party. The way she listened to me with full attention. The way she looked at me and smiled at me. I can't live without it anymore.

"Billie?" Maggie opens the door. "There's someone else who wants to see you."

"Oh, okay. Thanks, mom." Maggie smiles and closes the door again.

I pull away from the hug and stare at her. At the girl who wants to be mine, and there's nothing else I want more than to be hers. "Don't you dare ever scare me again like that, Eilish." She giggles, booping my nose. "That's not funny! I'm serious, I can't lose you."