For Better or for Worse (Stucky)

Falling Apart

„How long until Sam gets here?" Bucky asked, leaning against Steve as the blonde cut some onions, tossing them into a bowl.
„About 20 minutes." Steve replied softly, sighing as Bucky hugged his torso.

Bucky sighed and smiled against his cheek, kissing it softly. „I love you."
Turning his head and kissing him briefly, Steve smiled back as he looked into his eyes. „I love you, too."

Steve ran a hand over Bucky's cheek and kissed the tip of his nose softly. „I'm glad you're feeling better today."
Sighing and leaning against the counter, Bucky looked at him as his smile faded. „I'm sorry about yesterday."

Steve sighed and bit his lower lip. Wishing he could say it was okay, but knowing it wasn't. „We'll manage. I know you don't choose bad days. But please, try and stay calm when they happen."
Bucky's eyes flickered to the bruises on his own hand and towards the bathroom door -which Steve had told him about this morning, turning Bucky into a scared, apologetic mess-. „I-I... I'm sorry about the door, I told you."

„I know, my darling. It's just a door. It's better than if you'd hurt yourself. And I have no financial issues taking care of you and me." He kissed his forehead softly and smiled sadly. „But a new door is going to be expensive. It happened, we can't change that. But you need to gain control over your temper, yes? If you're upset, talk about it. Use your words. Try not to snap like that." Watching Bucky's expression falter and the way he bit his lip harshly, Steve sighed and pressed another kiss to his temple. „Don't get upset. I just think we need to start being open about this."

As Bucky's gaze stayed fixed on Steve's chest while the blonde ran a hand over his cheek, he knew he was zoning out again. Turning slightly, he leant against the counter and pulled Bucky into his arms as the brunet stayed still, eyes wide and breaths labored as Steve shushed him quietly, being awfully used to this. Breathing calmly and just holding Bucky close to his chest, Steve caressed his hair softly and waited for him to snap out of it, hating that his love still seemed to be struggling with his own mind so frequently.
The way Bucky gasped harshly and trembled for a second before realizing he was with Steve let him know he'd snapped out of it again. Forcing a soft smile onto his face for Bucky, Steve cupped his cheeks gently and kissed the tip of his nose. „Hey. I'm right here with you."

Lower lip still quivering slightly, Bucky exhaled shakily as he leant against Steve's shoulder, taking deep breaths as he tried to calm himself. „Sorry."
Steve kissed his temple and shook his head. „Don't be. I got you. Let's continue preparing dinner, okay?"
Hesitating for a second, Bucky thought about what Steve has asked of him earlier before nodding slowly, letting go off him and starting to prepare the béchamel sauce -having suggested making lasagna for Sam, like he'd said he would-.
Letting the radio play quietly in the background, Steve resumed what he'd been doing while looking at Bucky from time to time, staying quiet as his lover seemed preoccupied with cooking as well as his own thoughts.

Once they'd finished prepping everything, they both changed into fresh clothes quickly before Bucky walked over to Steve, extending his arms for a hug. Smiling softly, Steve pulled him close and kissed the side of his neck. „Hello there."
Bucky sighed and smiled as well, though Steve couldn't see it with his head resting on his shoulder. „Hey. I'm sorry about everything. I'll try and be better."
Steve sighed and held him close for a second before letting go, kissing his forehead. „I love you."
Bucky smiled softly, causing Steve's heart to flutter as he kissed his cheek, always wanting him to feel his affection. „I love you, too."

To Steve's surprise, it was Bucky who went to open the door as Sam knocked, smiling at him shyly as he let him enter, even taking his jacket like he'd seen Steve do for him. Steve had just finished setting the table as Sam and Bucky entered from the hallway, Sam holding two bottles of wine this time and pointing at Steve accusingly. „Don't say it. Just because you can't get drunk, it doesn't mean you can't drink." He grinned and Bucky smiled softly as he walked over to Steve, nuzzling against his side for comfort as he closed his eyes for a second.