Let me love you | Merluca

21 - embrace

4 weeks later

...

Meredith had noticed how Andrew was going through something, how he slowly pushed her away more and more. He didn't seem like he did it on purpose, if she was honest Andrew seemed like the only thing he wanted was to have her by his side, and yet he was still putting more and more distance between them. He closed himself off from her. He isolated himself. And she wished, she knew what was going on.

When she heard Bailey commenting that Andrew had called in sick the past two days, without her having heard from him at all, she couldn't keep herself from not getting worried anymore.

She somehow managed to get through her shift. She sent Andrew some messages during the day, asking how he was, but she never got a response. After she changed out of her scrubs, she asked Amelia to watch her kids before she made her way towards Andrew's apartment.

...

Meredith went towards his bedroom, seeing how he laid on his side, Theo next to him, holding his son in his embrace.

She hasn't met Theo yet, or better said Andrew hasn't introduced her to Theo yet. And she was not sure if that evening was the right moment. But she could also see how not okay Andrew looked.

She carefully made her way towards his bed, so she wouldn't wake up Theo who seemed to be soundly asleep.

"Hey." She whispered softly, making Andrew turn towards her. "Carina let me inside before she got a call from the hospital. She said she will be back as soon as she can." She explained as she sat down on the end of the bed, mustering him for some moments as he had already turned towards Theo again. She could see the tears he tried to hold back, not falling out yet, but heavily glistering in his eyes.

She quitely took off her shoes before she got closer to Andrew laying down behind him, embracing him while she put a small kiss onto his shoulder.

"You don't need to tell me what's going on right now, but... let me be your friend right now, let me be there for you." She whispered as she felt him tensing at her embrace, now slowly relaxing into her arms, while she caressed his hand.

The longer they stayed like this, the more she felt him calm down more and more, until he finally let the tears that had built up inside him fall out, not trying to hold them back anymore, letting his emotions out. She carefully tightened her grip around him as she heard him silently crying.

"I- I'm scared." Andrew started after some long moments, taking a shaky deep breath before he added "I'm scared not to be enough for Theo. I'm scared of myself."

"Andrew-" She carefully tried to stop him but didn't get trough to him.

"I haven't been feeling well the past few weeks... And I am living with bipolar disorder... I'm - I am scared it might happen again..."

She saw how Andrew carefully went through Theo's hair and then started to caress him slightly, still with his back towards her. But for the moment she was just glad that he let her be there.

"We will be there for you, Andrew."

"I- Right now I just want to forget about all that for just a moment." He sighed, turning slightly towards her, as far as he could without letting go of his embrace around Theo.

"Okay." Meredith whispered in response before she leaned in to give Andrew a small kiss. As he had turned towards his son again after giving her the slightest bit of a smile, she put another kiss onto his temple, caressing his arm again until he fell asleep.

...