I Want to be More (Attack on Titan, Shingeki no Kyojin)

Chapter 12; Survey Corps

Chapter 12; Survey Corps

No one really said anything as the fire burned away all of our friends bodies. Only today I had learned that Marco was dead. Honestly I couldn't stop crying. I never would have expected it... Poor Jean... I know that Marco sometimes seemed like Jean's only close friend, so I know how hard this was for him.. Mina and Thomas were also in there... The deafening silence was broken when Connie crouched down onto the ground and began sobbing loudly for our lost comrades.

"Damn titans..." I mumbled as a lone tear slipped down my cheek. I noticed Jean bend down and pick something up. He stood up at looked at us.

"Hey guys, have you decided what branch you're joining? I have. I.." He grabs his wrist tightly as tears welled up in his eyes. "I..I'm joining the Survey Corps!!" He said before bursting into tears. I've never really see him cry before. I frowned before walking over to him and pulling him into my arms. He immediately nuzzled his head into the crook of my neck and continued sobbing, damping my hair in the process, but I didn't care. Right now he needed someone, we all did.

******
I tossed and turned in my bed, there was no way I was going to be falling asleep anytime soon. Not with Eren far away from us, and definitely not with all the emotional trauma we've all gone through. I sighed and pushed myself up from the bed that once seemed so comforting, and now was nothing more than a grim memory of all we've lost. That may sound weird, like how could a bed represent all that, well, it's the idea of how this all started. How we all had beds to sleep in, now...there's too many empty ones.. A lump in my throat began to form.

"No not now." My voice cracked as I left the cabin. In a few days we'll finally choosing which branches we want to go into, which means we'll get to see Eren again. I hope he's alright... I sighed as I walked around in the cool night air. I began shivering slightly as I remembered I was only in shorts and a regular shirt. "Damn it.." I mumbled as I rubbed my arms. I didn't want to go back to the cabin, it was...suffocating in there. I needed to be out for a bit.

"What are you doing out here?" I turned around a face a casual attiredy Jean with crazy bed hair. I giggled softly at the way he looked. He glared at me as his cheeks flared up.

"I couldn't sleep so I came out for a walk." I have him a lopsided smile. He rolled his eyes and sighed.

"You too, eh? But aren't you cold? Why didn't you put a jacket on or something." He mumbled as he looked at what I was wearing. I scoffed and rolled my eyes.

"Because I just wanted to get out of there, I didn't want to spend anymore time in there." I admitted as I sighed. He sighed before taking his uniform jacket off, showing a dark tee shirt that clung to his body perfectly, slightly showing off his well built body through it. I coughed awkwardly as I adverted my gaze away from his body. He chuckled and handed it out to me. I raised my brow as I looked at him.

"Well put it on, stupid. Or do you need help?" He grinned as I scowled at him. I snatched the jacket from his grasp and rolled my eyes.

"I'm more than capable of putting it on myself, asswhipe." I mumbled as I put the jacket on, it was obviously much bigger than mine, which was nice, because it went down to the start of my thighs. Atleast I'll be a bit more warm. "Thank you." I smiled slightly up at him. He grinned and shrugged. "So...you're really joining the Survey Corps?"I tilted my head slightly as I looked at him. He cleared his throat and nodded.

"Yeah, I am."

"Guess we'll be seeing more of each other." I jokingly said as I nudged him with my shoulder. He chuckled softly as he began playing with a strand of my hair. My cheeks became flushed as I stared up at him.

"Guess we will." He whispered as he leaned in closer, leaving our faces inches away from each other. He was blushing madly as he stared at my lips longingly. My breathing became uneven as my heart beat sped up. I bit the inside of my cheek as I stared up into his beautiful light brown orbs, I almost felt myself getting lost in them. His hand glided across my cheek in a lovingly manner and rested on my chin. He tilted my head upward slightly as he lowered his head to close the gap.

"Hey what're you two doing out 'ere eh?" We jumped back from each other to stare wide eyed at a very sleepy Sasha. "Don't tell me you guys'r gonna sneak food out of tha kitchen too?" She slurred slightly, adding a yawn at the end. I stared at her in silence before I busted out laughing. I covered my mouth to conceal my giggling as I bent over slightly.

"Uh-" Jean's face was absolutely priceless. He was completely red, you could tell he was embarrassed. I straightened my self up as the giggling softened.

"Seriously Sasha? Do you do this every night?" I smiled as I looked out at her. Her hair was all over the place, she looked different with her hair down, still gorgeous none the less. She yawned slightly as she squinted her eyes at us as if to focus.

"Where you tw-"

"Oh shit!!" Jean whispered loudly. "Someone else is up and walking around. I'd rather not get introuble today so maybe we should all get back." He said before speed walking away. I raised my brow and looked around us to find no one. I scoffed slightly and turned my attention back to Sasha.

"No midnight snacks for you." I put my arm around her shoulders. "Let's get you back to bed." I led her back to our cabin, trying to avoid thinking about what happened with Jean, but that was nearly impossible. I helped Sasha over to her bed, where she collapsed snoring. I sighed as I fell onto my own bed. Everything's about to change. Tomorrow I'm officially part of the Scout Regiment, tomorrow the real battle begins.