JEALOUSY, JEALOUSY

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CHAPTER EIGHTEEN: JEALOUSY, JEALOUSY

"I've gone crazy, really, I think I've gone crazy."

WARNING: SPG CONTENT!

I couldn't help but smile, I just couldn't help it. Everything feels so different after talking to Timothy. It doesn't feel like a closure but a new beginning, we are able to talk like mature people who just had a mature conversation about the mistakes, and immature things we have done involving each other.

Hindi ko ineexpect na magkakaroon kami nang usapang dalawa, hindi ko naman alam kung paano ko siya ulet kakausapin nang magkita ulet kami. But Timothy really wanted to talk to me, he knew that he had hurt me. And I apologized during that time realizing na may mga nagawa rin akong bagay na dapat 'di ko ginawa.

I blamed my pain, the pain of my broken heart. But I was the one who chased him, I chased him and it only pushed me to the edge of the path that led me to what I have become.

Bakit nga ba ngayon ko lang narealize yun? I thought mature na 'ko, I thought alam ko na lahat. Pero nung nag-usap kami, doon 'ko narealize lahat. Doon ko rin sinabi ang lahat, doon din ako humingi nang patawad.

I should have been there as his friend, but I chose to force my feelings for him knowing na mahal niya pa rin si Francine. I should have known and helped him mend his broken heart, but not by chasing him and falling for him.

I never changed, I'm still not mature. But maybe I am, I'm still learning.

It's a big step na natapos nanamin yung usapan na'tin. I feel better as if everything I never knew I could feel and tell him was gone. Looks like I still have a lot of things to learn about my own feelings. I still have a lot to learn, and it's just the beginning.

"You look good." I woke up from my own thoughts when I heard his voice and felt his hand on top of my thighs.

Agad akong napangiti sa ginawa niya. Muntik ko nang makalimutan na tanghalian at magkasama kaming kumakain ngayon. Ngumiti ako sa kanya at hinawakan ang kamay niyang nasa hita ko. We're inside his office and he texted that he wanted to eat with me but he couldn't leave his office. I had no choice kung hindi magluto para sa kanya at kumain kasama niya.

"Hindi ko inaakalang magluluto ka para sa'kin."

"I'm your girlfriend, I want to do something for you."

Lumaki ang ngiti niya sa sinabi ko at mas lalong pang inilapit ang sarili niya sa'kin. He didn't even hesitate anymore and carried me and placed me on top of his lap. I wrapped my arms around his neck to pull myself closer to him.

"I didn't know you could do something for me, doll." he replied, adding his pet name for me.

Kinagat ko ang labi ko sa tinawag niya sa'kin. He usually calls me by my name but it's different kapag kaming dalawa lang. It changed days ago when we had sex inside his bar in Cavite, he called me 'doll' for the first time, and it... it changed me.

I hated pet names, but it's different if it's from him.

"I told you..." I paused, feeling his hot breath and his hands going places around my thighs.

"...that... I..."

He smirked, he knew he got me.

"I... want to do something for you, hm?" I smiled awkwardly.

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