Someone To Lose//Merder

I Love You Doesnt Heal Everything...

Derek POV

"Meredith!...Meredith!" We have been yelling her name for the past hour. We have gone over almost every street searching, screaming her name. every single one of our friends has been searching. I know they blame me. I blame myself too but I can't help but mostly blame Addison. if it wasn't for her abrupt, rude entrance we would be asleep right now in the trailer, snuggled after a night of mind-blowing sex. We didn't even have to worry about sleep. We both have days off, I had a surprise for her. Our days off were rarely in sync with each other.

I'm pulled out of my thoughts by the sound of screaming, familiar screaming. It's too familiar.

"Izzie Pullover Now!" I yell trying to keep the tears from flowing 

The car comes to a screeching halt as it pulls over to the side of the road.

"Meredith!" I yell once more to alert her of our presence, jumping out of the car. I know that was her scream now I just need to find her.

I call her name once more before I see a small petite figure emerge from the alleyway. "D-Derek" I hear her whimper. It's not until she steps under the streetlight that I can see the full extent of her injuries. Her face was beaten and bruised and her blood-stained clothing.

"Mer !"I yell as I run towards her. she staggers towards me with tears in her eyes "Derek? I don't f-feel too g-good" she murmurs before falling into my arms. I lower us both onto the floor holding her on my lap. Stroking her hair out of her face.

her heart beating slow and uneven and her body shivering. probably from the blood loss.

"Izzie call an ambulance and then call the chief." I watch as she sprints back to the car grabbing her phone before dialing.

I look back down at mer. her face pale and her eyes terrified. I kiss her on the forehead whilst trying to think of ways to keep her awake. "Derek c-cold.." she moans before tears come spilling out of her eyes. I quickly remove my coat and lay it on top of her pulling her body close to mine in an attempt to keep her warm. "You'll be okay mer I've got you" I kiss her again this time on the lips desperate to make her know I love her. 

"I love you mer" I stroke her face knowing that she has to stay responsive. I want to take her into the car and keep her warm but I can't move her I know I cant.

"I l-love you-you t-too" her breaths becoming erratic and I notice she moves her hands to her stomach. "D-Derek. pregnant" I pull her closer with tears threatening to spill from my eyes. "I know, I know" in my mind, I know there is very little possibility that the baby could have survived this, and from the blood spread down her thighs I don't believe it has.

"The ambulance is on its way!" Izzie yells jogging over with the blankets from the back of the car and a bottle of water.  I take the blankets from her wrapping Meredith up tighter not loosening my hold on her for one second.

"Is there anything I can do for her?" she asks me her eyes full of worry and concern for her friend.

"No, no you've done everything you can maybe call the others to let them know what's going on though." 

"Will do dr.shepherd."

"Derek"

"Huh?" she turns around looking at me confused.

"Call me Derek, your Mer's family"

"Okay, Dr - Derek ill go call them now" she jogs back to the car leaving me and Meredith alone.

"A-Addison" she whimpers facing up at me. I know what she's asking me she wants to know more about Addison and what happened 5 hours prior.

"Mer, I love you not her. she was a drunken mistake in vegas I've been trying to divorce for over a year. I want to be with you no one else. I can't imagine my life without you" a sob escapes from her lips as she tries to move up to kiss me. I notice her discomfort so instead, I lean down and kiss her on the lips. a kiss filled with desperation. "L-love you" she mumbles into my chest as I stroke the back of her hair.

I notice the blood on my hand as I pull it away. her eyelids begin to flutter shut as I see the sirens of the ambulance approaching. 

I kiss her on the head "mer, honey stay awake the ambulance is here. you going to be okay"

"Mmm t-t-tired" she speaks with gritted teeth. She's hurting and there's nothing I can do to help.

Her breathing is becoming shallower and shallower as we speak. The ambulance pulls over as a paramedic hops out and approaches

"What do we have?" the man asks putting the gurney beside me as I place Meredith on not letting her hand go for one second.

"Meredith Grey - 28 - pregnant. I found her ten minutes ago after she went missing a few hours ago. she was found in the alley she is allergic to penicillin." 

"Okay" he looks down at Meredith "we are going to take good care of you okay." they wheel her into the rig and I hop on with her. 

"I'll meet you at the hospital" Izzie yells my way.

"Okay" I breathe shakily

"Derek she'll be okay."

"I hope" I whisper staring back to mer who was now being hooked up to multiple machines to monitor her.

"Okay, let's get going," the paramedic says proceeding to shut the doors and signaling to the driver. I keep my eyes fixed on Meredith, her small hand in mine. whispering words of comfort in her ear.

She has to be alright.

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Sorry for the slow update I was having an internal debate over who should find her. but I finally figured that I wanted them to clear the air over Addison and what better way to do it than her on her death bed... anyway thanks for all the reads the next part will be out asap. - Lizzie xx