Ginny and Georgia: The Younger Shadow

Chapter 42- Meeting Jonathan Atley
"You sure you don't want us to come with you, Charlie?" Madi asked as we stood outside Jonathan's grand house. He lived in the posher side of Wellsbury for sure, all the neat, cream suburban houses lining up with each other in an orderly way. There were masses of flowers in his garden: red hot roses, moon coloured daises, and they were all a dancing rainbow, like light and music had found a way to blossom together. I was standing at the front door with Aria, Kara and Madi, who had all begged my relentlessly to come with, and finally I caved in and told them they could come to the front door with me. Despite the fact Jonathan's house looked neat and clean, there was still loads of kids toys littering their front lawn: abandoned balls and swings, as well as a few beheaded teddy bears which Kara pointed out. I gulped nervously, and felt a lump in my throat rise. I couldn't do this. I couldn't. The gorgeous golden lion brass knocker was just in my reach. All I needed to do was press it.
"Charlie? Come on, you can do this! We'll go but stay on the street waiting for you. Ok? I bought some snacks and stuff so we'll be ok." Aria squeezed my hand reassuringly, the corners of her mouth raising in a smile.
"Thank you all" I said earnestly, taking my purse and phone out, "I love you guys."
"Since when did you get so soppy, Charlotte Miller? Now get on in there, you're wasting time!" Kara pushed me forward and my friends ran across the street till the great oak tree seemed to swallow them whole. Though I hadn't admitted it to them, I was terrified out of my life. My skin hung loosely on my bones and I felt so sick. But before I could do anything more, the door flung open. A little girl who looked maybe seven or eight years old stood there in a petite pink dress, sucking her thumb and looking at me like I was an alien who had come to kidnap her.
"Who are you?" She asked, twisting her unruly and curly brown hair.
"Um, I've come to see Jonathan Atley. Are you Indigo?" This must say be his second daughter.
"Oh yeah, daddy said someone would be coming to talk to him! What's your name?" She opened the door a little more and let me inside. Jonathan's house on the inside wasn't quite what I was expecting. On the outside it looked quite elegant, minus the kid toys. But on the inside it was a whole mountain of garbage. The hallway was littered with stray packets of baby food and clothes, as well as blankets and toys. I wondered where Indigo's mom was.
"Um, my name's Evie. Is Jonathan's office that way?" Indigo skipped ahead and lead me to where he was. As we walked through the hallway I couldn't help admiring the family pictures on the wall. Dad, mom, the pleased children. Picture perfect, it seemed. Even if the house was messy, it was nothing without family and love.
"Do you have any siblings, Evie? I have so many and they're so mean to me sometimes!" Indigo whined. She was really friendly.
"Um, I have a brother and sister." I vaguely replied, picking my way through the rubbish.
"Are they annoying too? My sister Cece trashed my whole room because she thought I took her princess crown!" I almost had to stop myself from laughing. If only I could be a little kid and have her problems.
"Yeah. And, uh, where's your mom, Indigo? Is she ok with my being here?" I didn't want a startled damsel in distress to find some stranger in her house talking to her child.
"No one calls me Indigo, silly! Just call me Indy. And my mom said I could let you in but she's with the baby and she's mad because my brother spilt something and then she said there's no use crying haver spilt milk. What does that mean?" I nearly tripped as she suddenly stopped in front of me, and tried to stop myself from cursing.
"Um, just means there's no use crying over something you can't change. Anyway, is this your dad's office? Is he in there?" We reached the end of the never ending hallway, where a brass plate read Mr Jonathan Atley, Head of the Wellsbury Paper.
"Yes, my daddy is in there. Hi, daddy!" Indy yelled, and a rough, deep voice replied,
"Is Evie here, Indy? Thanks for bringing her, darling. Come in!" Jonathan. It was actually him. Oh god. Indy pushed me in and I walked into the office. I was expecting it to be all cluttered like the rest of the house, but this one seemed quite neat and homely. Family pictures were hung on the walls, and all the Atley children seemed to have the same identical grins and some had blonde and others brown hair. His wife looked extremely beautiful as well, with midnight black hair and eyes like green gems.
"There you are, Miss Blackheath. Thank you for coming." I turned around to see Jonathan, and was met with an uncontrollable gasp.
"Cassie?" He had an eccentric look on his face, eyebrows raised and mouth hanging open. Jonathan reached for a glass of water and chugged it down his throat. I was completely thrown off. And if I want nervous enough, this just added to the mix. Cassie? And Jonathan had quite obviously changed from that picture taken nearly 15 years ago. It was some quicksilver changes. In the photo he had rich dark hair, all curly and wild like Indigo's. But it was now cut short and straight, and even though he was in his 30s, he had strands of silver hair that were still visible to the naked eye. He had a black word suit on, with a Scarlett napkin in his pocket, even though he was home. I could see he had on maroon coloured shoes, the laces done up. Why was he wearing such uncomfortable clothes at home? Did he just do that for fun?
"Um, sorry, I don't know who Cassie is." I said. He seemed to relax, but I noticed as I took a seat in an old swivel chair opposite to his desk, his eyes never left me. I shivered and gritted my teeth together. I couldn't say who I really was. Could I?
"So, Miss Blackheath, you mentioned you had some news to share with me, that would be of interest to the Wellsbury paper. I'm always willing for people to share stories, especially if they have potential."
"Um, actually, my name isn't Evie Blackheath." I stumbled over my words and fiddled with my hands, and Jonathan shuffled in his seat, stroking his stubbly black beard.
"But you told me it was? Is there some kind of mixup? If this is a joke I really don't appreciate it and you can leave." He signalled to the door and I cried-
"No! It's not that. It's just...did you know someone, 15 or so years ago, called Anthony Greene?" Jon didn't say anything at first, but I sensed from the way he froze on the spot and glared at me he knew what I was talking about. This was the man.
"What is this about? Who are you, child?" He asked.
"Anthony Greene is my dad. You were friends with him, weren't you?" Quickly, I extracted the worn photo from my purse and handed it to him. Jon studied it for a while, his eyes crinkling with something. Maybe the memories. The nostalgia.
"Haven't seen this photo for a while. Oh God, this was so long ago. And Georgia and Ginny are there...you're Georgia's baby she was pregnant with, aren't you? How did you find me?" And so I told him everything. How I was curious. How my mom seemed to be choking herself with all the secrets. How my friends had helped me, and how I wanted answers to the questions that always seemed to come. And Jon was a good listener, never pausing and only occasionally asked questions. Maybe that was why he was the head of the Wellsbury newspaper.
"Wow. Charlotte, I never ever thought I would see Anthony's baby. He came up with the name, you know. Charlotte. After his mother, who he was incredibly close with."
"My mom said she named me after Charlotte in North Carolina. We moved there when I was a few weeks old."
"Nonsense! Anthony always was set on calling you Charlotte. He would try and speak with you through your mom's belly. Always the comic, he was." He seemed lost in thought for a moment. I hesitated before asking,
"But the reason I came, Jon, is to find Anthony. My mom said he left two days before I was born. Why would he leave if he wanted me so much? If he loved me?" I thought I might have overdone it a bit, but Anthony leaned back in his chair and said,
"He did leave. Apparently there was a note saying he wasn't prepared to be a dad and had moved across the country. Which was funny. I haven't spoken to him since that picture was taken. He never spoke to me, and I don't know why. We were best friends. We got up to all kinds of mischief together. But I thought maybe he went back to Beth."
"Back to Beth? Who's she?" I scanned my mind to see if any name came up, but it was a blank void. I had never heard of this woman.
"Bethany Carlow? She was Anthony's ex girlfriend. They dated from when they were 14 to 18 And- oh god, you didn't know."
"Didn't know what?"
"Anthony had twins with her. A girl called Cassandra and a boy who transitioned into a male a few years ago, called Clay. But he didn't.Didn't your mom tell you that you have two other siblings? They'd be 18 now. Wow, it feels crazy. Seeing my best friend's daughter. I don't know why he ever left, but I thought maybe he came back to you."
"I have two more siblings? He had twins with another woman when he was 16?"
"That's right. I never knew if he told Georgia. But listen here, Charlotte: don't blame yourself for whatever happens. Nothing in this complicated world is your fault." Well....whatever I had been expecting, it wasn't to hear I had two more siblings. He must've thought I was Cassandra, and I had a trans brother, Clay. I had more siblings! How was I ever going to accept that?
"Jonathan, you don't know where my dad is? But I thought- I thought he would be here." And I couldn't help the cascade of tears that followed. It was a little awkward but Jonathan gave me some tissues to blow my nose with.
"Exhaustion is a thin blanket tattered with bullet holes." Jon announced in his deep tone. I looked up and saw him holding a faded photo album.
"It's of me and Jonathan. I think there are a few pictures of Cassie and Clay in here. Although I haven't seen them or their mother Bethany since they were ten. I recently heard that Clay transitioned, but we don't talk much." I didn't say anything, but held the album in my lap, smoothing the white cover and holding it closer. I turned the pages and saw pictures of two boys. One was a lanky, dark haired boy smiling a gap toothed grin with a strawberry ice cream in his hands, and the other was a noticeably shorter boy with white blonde hair and eyes as stormy as the sea, holding a mint ice cream, his mouth smeared with it.
"Is the blonde boy Anthony? But I thought he had dark hair like you?"
"He dyed it when he was 14. He never much liked his blonde hair. Said it made him look prissy. I guess a combination of my blonde mom and blonde Anthony was what made my hair so golden.
"You know you look exactly like him. Feels like I'm looking a girl version, but you're similar to Cassandra and Clay. You all have the same features." The next page had similar pictures; two boys swimming in a pool, hanging out of a great tree, cycling together, watching movies together and a birthday party with a rose coloured cake and miniature edible car figures. And they looked so innocent. So happy. The pages after that showed two teenagers who had grown a lot more; confidence was the first thing I noticed. Now my dad had dark hair and there were pictures of him with his arm hanging protectively over a girl with brown, mousy hair. They were grinning stupidly at the camera and the girl had a sky blue cheerleader uniform, two pom poms in her grip.
"Is that Bethany?" I pointed to the woman and Anthony leaned over my shoulder.
"Sure is. She was never as outgoing as your father, but she liked sports and cheerleading. And Beth was fun to hang out with. But it was a shock to us all when she fell pregnant- and with twins no less! I won't ever forget the judging looks that followed her. She was almost going to have an abortion, but decided she wanted to have them after all. And Anthony was still pretty supportive. He worked extra hours just to provide for his little, peculiar family."
"My mom makes him sound like the devil. She said Anthony was a terrible man." Now I was repeating mom's words. Jon portrayed my dad as a hero, but wasn't he meant to do all those things anyway? God, everything was just so confusing. It felt like I was reading a book and had just skipped to the middle, where you need to catch up on what's happened.
"I think I know why. But you need to promise that what I tell you about your father and me stays in this room. You got it, Charlotte?" Jonathan smelled like old leather and bitter coffee, and I nodded and waited. I didn't want to think anymore. I just wanted to shut my brain off, to have some humming sound inserted in my mind so I didn't have to process anything I was learning. So many lies and years wasted-
"Anthony and I ran an illegal gambling club. Your grandad owned a club, you know, with all the flashing party lights that blind you and normal poker games. Well, when he was working while Beth was pregnant, he was framed by some guy who had wanted to be Beth's boyfriend, and he made it look like Anthony  had taken cash out of the register. Of course, he did no such thing, but nobody would listen to him. Anthony's dad, Julian, owned the club, which is called The Lion's Den, and he let Anthony help him run it. Together, they made an illegal gambling ring for more money, because customers at that point were running low. There was a rival pub that was stealing all their usual drinkers. And when I heard about it, I wanted in. I was a broke boy, with not much money, and at that point I hadn't discovered my interest in journalism, and I can't believe I'm telling you this. There's just something about you that makes people want to open up sometimes. You're a true mirror image of Anthony."
"Wow. Illegal? So much crime here." I muttered, and Jon nodded hesitantly, before speaking,
"I'm sorry that I don't know where Anthony is. He just disappeared out of the blue, about two or so days before you were born. As I said to you, your mom told everyone she found a note saying he couldn't be a father anymore and had left the country. He never spoke to anyone, never gave any signal he wanted to leave. But who knows, maybe the fear caught up to him." Jonathan said, scratching his chin, and I sighed and said,
"It's ok. I shouldn't have gotten my hopes up. But why would my dad leave suddenly? Havent you considered something dangerous could've happened to him? What if he went missing? What if he was- was mannapped! Anything could've happened!" I gripped the edge of the seat till my knuckles were sore, and Jon tutted in sympathy.
"That can't be possible, Charlie. You see, in 2008, five years later, Anthony made an Instagram account. I knew it was his because he suddenly texted Beth to say he was well and alive. He refused to make any calls, but last I heard he was in Alaska or Nebraska. The account was banned or something, so there's no use trying to find it."
"Thank you for helping me anyway, Jonathan. At least I know a bit more. As much as you, I suppose." I was just turning to leave when Jonathan gripped my arm and yelled,
"Wait! I know I've opened up to you a lot already, but if you want to meet Cassie and Clay, and Beth, I think they still live at The Lion's Den."
"The bar that my grandad used to own?"
"Your grandad Julien passed away in 2004 but years later Beth bought it and now she works and lives there with her kids. Maybe they moved or something, but it could be worth checking out. Maybe Bethany knows something I don't. Even if Anthony left her for your mom, they were still quite close." Visit Cassie and Clay? And their mom? My dad had left her to be with Georgia. My stomach churned and I knew I wouldn't be visiting them anytime soon.
"Thank you, Jon. It's great meeting you as well." He shook my hand warmly and gestured me out of the office. When I at last left the house, the streets were bathed in moonlight and darkness shrouded the sky. But much to my surprise, three figures were still sitting on one of the lawns, chortling with laughter. Their voices carried into the wind as I reached them.
"Charlie! Hey...you came!" Aria's voice slurred and she gave a silly laugh before sighing and laying her head on the grass.
"Yeah, our fave girl! What were you doing again, Ch-Cheerio? Is that your name? Weird name!" Kara laughed and flung her arms around me, but I shrugged it off. Madi lay slumped on the floor, singing songs off beat and picking on the emerald grass.
"Don't tell me you got fucking drunk in some random person's backyard? What the hell? When did you have the time to even get any drinks?" I couldn't believe them. They had to go and get wasted while I found out one of the worst piece of information in my life. I thought I was so close I could grasp the truth with my fingers, but now all hope had slipped away and left me this mess.
"Get up, now. Get up!" I hissed at the girls and yanked Aria's arm. She gave me an angry glare and said,
"Hey, Charlio! That...that hurt!" She burped loudly and Madi and Kara burst into peaks of drunken laughter. I had to get them out before anyone saw. Before anyone found out.
"Shut up, Aria. Take my hand. Kara, take my other. Madi, hold Aria's hand." Surprisingly, they listened and obeyed without much protest, and Aria leaned her head against my shoulder and whispered,
"I'm s-sorry, Charlie. I didn't mean to..." she chattered her teeth and soon we had gotten to the Baker's house. We were supposed to be having a sleepover since it was a Saturday night and we were all free, but I felt sick with dread and I knew I wouldn't be able to stand it.
"Bye, guys. Tell Max to look after you." I was still pissed at them. What was wrong with my friends sometimes? I didn't want to sound like a priss so I kept all my rude thoughts to myself, but it hurt still, knowing they didn't really care and just thought everything a fun adventure. I kicked at a grey pebble and sat down on the front step in the porch. They say hope breeds eternal misery. Well, that sure was true.