Phriends Against Physics

Chapter 13

"I'm so glad you're all here," Jimmy addressed the group. "Foamy has told me so much about you guys and I know you're all going to love zucchini crap!" The three new girls smiled and clapped their hands, knowing they were in for a treat. "We actually have zucchini crap at Crepe," Elizabeth began, "but it's not very good. They use too much corn in Nebraska." Foamy nodded her head in agreement. "Yuck, I was in Nebraska once and I agree. Everything there is too corny." Everyone made gagging noises at the thought of corny zucchini. Funnily enough, the documentary King Corn was playing on the TVs at SRNY. "We don't have zucchini crap in Montana," said Grace, "so I'm pretty pumped!" Meghan nodded her head in agreement, chiming in, "Yeah, there aren't a whole lot of zucchini crap options at the Chandelier cafeteria." Everyone made gagging noises again as they remembered the food at the Chandelier High School cafeteria. "At least the cookies there were good," Foamy said, reminiscing about the warm, soft cookies. "Now, friends," Jimmy announced once again, "I know it's fun that we are all here together. But we must remember that we are here on business." Everyone then got all business-like and sat up straight, ready to discuss some serious business. "Meghan, what do you know about Broberg's new plan?" The truth is, Meghan didn't know much. Broberg actually did a pretty good job of keeping his evil life separate from his teacher life. He was so good, in fact, that most students and fellow teachers didn't know about his evil life at all. There had only ever been two other students who had found out about his evil life and tried to snitch on him...and they were never again seen at Chandelier High School. "The only thing I really know is that he seems to be recruiting people in STEM," said Meghan. "At least that's what he told me over the phone." Knowing that Elizabeth and Grace were also smart science people, this made sense. Maybe he needed some people to help him with an experiment again? And this time, was he only picking the best and brightest so that they wouldn't screw it up? Charlie did make a mess of things the last time, and everyone knows that he was not the best and brightest. Everyone must have been thinking the same thing, because then they all looked over at Milo, an actor. "So then why does he want you?" Jimmy asked Milo in a way that was kinda condescending. Ouch. With her wheels a-turnin', Foamy remembered that Milo had once played a superhero. She also knew that Broberg sometimes had trouble separating reality from what he saw on TV. That's what led to his Star Wars cosplay habit- he really, really wanted to live the Star Wars. "Meghan," she addressed her friend, "have you seen Broberg dress up in his Star Wars costumes lately?" Meghan pondered this for a hot sec, and then answered affirmatively. This only confirmed Foamy's suspicion that not only was Broberg recruiting smart science people, but he was also recruiting people with superhuman abilities. He already had Darth Vader on his side, so with another powerful sidekick, he would be unstoppable. Foamy burst out laughing when she realized this, garnering confused looks from her husband and her friends. "Superheroes don't exist!" Exclaimed the Foam. Still confused, Milo asked what her point was. "I think that Broberg thinks you have actual superpowers, and that he can somehow use you in whatever plan he's created!" The rest of the group realized this and also began to giggle. "That was a really long time ago!" Exclaimed Milo, giggling gleefully. "Yeah, and there's no way you could actually do any of that stuff," said Jimmy, once again challenging his fellow TV star. "Do you want to find out?" Milo countered, squaring up. Jimmy was about to follow when both dudes were met by Foamy slaps to their faces. "THAT IS ENOUGH FROM YOU TWO!" Foamy screamed. "Yeah, why are you guys always fighting?" Jackie asked. In agreement, Naomi contributed, "I think you two should continue in friendship!" This made everyone giggle. Suddenly, the zucchini crap came and Jimmy and Milo decided that there is no better time to settle one's grievances than at dinner over zucchini crap at SRNY. "I do not like that you are always hitting on my wife!" said Jimmy, "I know she's super hot, but chill!" Milo considered this and answered, "I'm so sorry. Your wife is young and hot, but I never meant to give off that vibe!" Jimmy then responded, "Well then, what vibe did you mean to give off? It seems pretty flirty to me!" Milo defended, "No, I'm just naturally super hot and charming. But I promise I'm not flirting with your wife because I am dating Mandy Moore!" Silence fell upon the entire restaurant at that moment in time. Mouths hung open. Zucchini crap tumbled out of said mouths. Raw zucchini flew throughout the kitchen and glasses full of zucchini sundaes clattered to the ground. It was a mess. "You're doing what to Mandy Moore?!" Jimmy finally answered, breaking the silence. "We're dating!" Milo replied. When everyone in the restaurant was sure they had heard it right, they began to stand on tabletops and applaud. Milo rose from his seat and took a bow. No one could believe that Mama and Papa Pearson were finally together in real life. This was a dream come true. "So, wait a second," Foamy interjected. "If you and Mandy are together, why didn't she come out here with you?" Milo sat back down and answered, "She stayed home to take care of our new puppy. Want to see a picture?" The girls and Jimmy all squealed with excitement as Milo scrolled through his camera roll to find a picture of his puppy. It literally took like three hours for him to find one. He scrolled through picture after picture of exotic fruits, cars, food, cool selfies and other obscure images, finally arriving at a photo of his little golden retriever puppy. Everyone in the restaurant was suddenly gathered around the table, gushing over the picture of the tiny puppy. Grace yelled at everyone for being in her personal space so they went away and returned to peacefully eating, making and delivering zucchini crap. "What's his name?" Jimmy asked, to which Milo responded, "Enzo." Foamy clapped her hands and giggled gleefully. "Great name!" Everyone was happily eating their zucchini crap when suddenly, Jimmy had a thought. "Hey, why don't you call Mandy and tell her and Enzo to come out to New York?" Foamy dropped her fork in shock and with excitement, asked, "Seriously?!" Jimmy nodded as Foamy tightly embraced him. Milo considered this for a hot sec and then dialed Mandy's number. Or so he thought. He actually dialed a pizza place by accident. "Whoops, that was supposed to be a two, not a four!" Silly Milo. The pizza guys delivered a pizza anyway, with extra zucchini, which everyone at the table devoured in about thirty seconds. Then, Milo got the number right and invited his girlfriend and their puppy out to New York, an invitation which they accepted. Cheering, the eight friends finished their zucchini crap and headed home.