The world's worst double date in history

29 1 0
                                        

Emerson: Tell me WHY I agreed to this?!

Fiore: Because you were half-asleep and didn't know what was going on.

The 4 are walking down the street about to have another double date ( Which obviously Emerson regrets. ), today they would take a break for the fear and anger of the battle for the world and just have a day of happiness.

John: Ah, the sun is so sexy.

Sera: John, why?

Emerson: Oh no.

Fiore: Hey, I've got an idea! Why not we get ice cream?

Sera: That's a great idea!

John: Slurp slurp!

Emerson: 😳 What the hells the matter with him?

The 4 walk into a local ice cream shop, as they wait in line something bad happens.

Emerson: *fucks around on his phone* Huh, my package arrived.

*SMACK!*

John: MMM!!

Fiore: Did you just slap my ass?!

Emerson: What?!

John: Sorry, ment for Sera's butt.

Sera: 😓

*SMACK!*

John: MMM!!

Sera: You hit your own ass.

Emerson: What the hell?

*SMACK!*

Fiore: AGAIN?! YOU HIT ME AGAIN!

Emerson: 😡 JOHN!

John: I'm sorry I swear.

Sera: Just stop smacking asses please.

*SMACK!*

The idiot fucking missed again and hit Emerson's butt.

Emerson: *activates ability and jumps on top of John* YOU FUCKING SLUTTY ASSHOLE!! *vigorously punches John.*

Sera: You two stop!

Emerson: NO!

Fiore: I'm going to call 911, the mental hospital and a pedophila report office. All 3 for him.

Sera: Oh stop it!

Emerson: *gets up* Fucking smack Fiore or I's asses one more time! I'm going to fucking kill-!

Cashier: Can I take your order?

Emerson's face drops from embarrassment.

Sera: Yeah I would like a citrus mix flavor.

Fiore: Yeah me too!

Emerson: I'll just get a raspberry sherbet.

John: *leans on the counter with his elbow* I'll take the cucumber and penis flavor, topped with pussy juice.

Emerson: EWW WHAT THE HELL?!

Cashier: Uh, I'm sorry? What?

John: You heard me. *drops his pants*

Sera: Oh my god! John pull your damn pants up!

Emerson: I swear he's high.

Fiore: Yeah right?

Cashier: Well here's everyone's orders.

John: Hey! This mint!

Sera: John, let's GO! *extremely angry*

The exit out and Seraphina immediately gives John a talking too.

Sera: WHY WERE YOU FLIRTING WITH THE CASHIER AND SMACKING OUR FRIEND'S ASSES OUT OF NOWHERE?!

John: The cashier part was inexcusable and I'm sorry for that but I was horny.

Fiore: And they had the audacity to tell us we need a sexual life.

Emerson: Pfft right.

Sera: Well if I fix it will you stop?

John: Yes.

Emerson rolls his eyes and grabs Fiore's hand and takes her to a store.

Emerson: You don't want to stick around.

Fiore: Hm? OK?

The spend 10 minuted there, both of them being bored and go back to John and Sera.

Fiore: Why did we leave?

Emerson: You'll find out in a minute.

Sera: Hey.

Fiore: You dyed your hair half white while we were gone?

Sera: Its half white?!

John: *in a sweaty T-shirt and boxers....in public* Hell yeah.

Sera: Shit what do I do?!

Fiore: Oh....that's not hair dye. 🤢

Emerson: Why did you do it in public?

John: Its not public when we did it in a tree over there. *points to a random tree*

Emerson: A TREE?! THAT'S IN PUBLIC YOU LOW IQ IDIOT!!

Sera: Yay got it off! Do you guys want to go to a restaurant?

They go to the same French place Arlo had 35 coffees in.

Emerson: Jeez Arlo is still there!

Arlo In the background: *sip* 1,248.

John: He he.

*SMACK!*

Sera: Finally on target.

Fiore: Wait, John is still in his underwear.

Emerson: 🙄 Doesn't supprise me.

They order but John is horny high again.

John: *eating tomatoe soup* This looks sexy.

Sera: John do I have to again?

John: Yup.

Seraohina puts her hand under the table.

Emerson: 😳

Fiore: 🤮

John: 🥴

Emerson: NO! Now is not the time!

Sera: I'm sorry, what what you gotta do if you love someone.

Fiore: If Em' was like that, he would love me enough not to embarrass me.

Emerson: Plus when am I ever like that?

John: Your hand feels good Sera.

*GASP!*

Emerson woke up.

Emerson: Ah my head.

Fiore: Can't sleep either?

Emerson: I was until I had a nightmare.

Fiore: What was it about?

Emerson: That we went on another double date abd John was a big horny asshole and Sera constantly had to please him in public.

Fiore: Dude, that just happened this morning.

Emerson: Oh fuck me. *puts his head back on the pillow.

Fiore: You want me to?

Emerson: Not you too!

Fiore: It was just a joke.




unOrdinary: Lost Ability - A Play Script StoryWhere stories live. Discover now