Blindsided

Blinding Lights

As promised, Chapter Eleven is here! We're getting over the big emotional hill of the story now, so from about here things will be falling into place and we can tackle the main plot instead of lingering in the B-plot so much. I originally planned to be done around chapter ten but this story's really taken on a life of its own, and the community has been so supportive that it's been a joy to work on this.

We have this and a Sarvente chapter before we get this all wrapped and squared away, and can delve into getting the kids back home for real. Many thanks to Dotemms for her fantastic beta work, the feedback is great at getting me out of my head and she read over these two for me while I was sobbing over my feels. Song is Blinding Lights by The Weeknd, and is the entire reason this plotline exists! It's what inspired the name and the B-plot entirely, and from there everything fell into place.

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  Ruv walked the sidewalk outside the church, shoulders hunched and deep in thought. The night was balmy, and no one was on the streets with the lurid lamplight and harsh shadows. As he walked, he let out a shaky breath and scrubbed at his face. The adrenaline was wearing off, leaving his hands shaky and his body tired.

  Sarv's confession had shaken him to the core and Sel's outburst before had been uncalled for but, Ruv decided, ultimately necessary. He shoved his hands into his pockets as he loped down the sidewalk. He ignored the buildings and lights of cars passing by, so lost in his thoughts as he was, and when he got to a more populated area he ignored the people around him.

  Walking had always helped clear his head, but tonight his thoughts were loud and insistent. He couldn't get the image of Sarvente out of his head: her tearstained face, the anguish in her eyes, the panic in her voice as she begged him to stay. He ducked his head; all he would do is hurt her. Some protector he was.

  He'd always been poison for those around him. It's why he never trusted people to stick around. Everyone always left him, so he'd run from his problems before they could. All he seemed to do was run, but he knew eventually he'd stumble and they'd catch up to him. And tonight they finally had.

  So what was he going to do about all this? He was still reeling from finding out Sarv shared his feelings. The whole situation had been intense, and he thought by leaving he could figure things out but instead he just felt more confused. What was he going to do? What did he really feel for her?

  It wasn't lust, at least not fully. She was beautiful, tiny waist and legs for days and the face of an angel hiding a devil inside. She was absolutely sinful that night in her dress, the black contrasting with her skin and the smell of peonies in her hair. Fuck, she looked practically edible when she'd wear her sleep clothes, those tiny shorts under her sweater that always slid off her milky shoulders made him want to devour her. She exuded sex and she didn't even know it. Or if she did, she didn't know what it was she did to him.

  But that wasn't the only thing about her that was attractive. Despite being a literal demon of the abyss, she was so undeniably sweet. Her smile could light up a whole room, and it was infectious. If it didn't hurt so badly for him to smile, he wouldn't be able to stop when she was around. That was how vibrant she was, how her personality made the shadows in his life seem to disappear. She would touch his arm or hug him, and instead of just wanting to get away he'd melt into it. She was the only one allowed to touch him, and these past few weeks the only reason he'd touch and be touched by the kids was because they were as much a part of her as part of him.

  He tugged his hoodie closer around him, the lights of the city around him a blinding cacophony of neon. The wind got trapped between the buildings and made a series of wind tunnels, making it colder here than out where the church was. It teemed with people, multitudes living their lives in the concrete and asphalt. He hated it; he much preferred the haven they'd created at the church. There it was green, and vibrant, and it was where he was with her.