A house is only as fun as your house mate

Chapter 9: Lance

I ran upstairs, phone by my ear, and the dial tone, whistling at such a high pitch, it almost hurt my ears. The unmistakable voice of Clavis Irvine rang through the speakers as he greeted me over the old mobile. “lance?” he asked.

“Hey buddy.” I started, trying to sound the cheeriest that I could.

“what’s up?” he offered.

“I nearly asked Keith to be my boyfriend.” There was a high pitch squeal from the other side of the line. “was that you?” I asked, genuinely concerned at how high Clavis’ voice could go. He let out a breathy chuckle. “no, I’m afraid not. Bellamy caused that impossible noise.” He put extra emphasis on the last few words, hinting that Bellamy had just been scolded. “i thought Bellamy was at work.” I stated. Clavis hummed through the phone. “nah, he got the day off.” I gave a little ‘aw’ and continued with what I had originally called him for. “back to Keith. What the hell happened Lance? Why did you chicken out?” Clavis continued.

“He’s found himself a place now.” I sighed. I rubbed my temples and brushed my hair out the way of my face. It wasn’t even in my face half of the time, so I don’t understand why I did that so often. “damn Lance.”

I sighed. “i know, I don’t want him to go. I don’t know what to do. What do I do? Clavis, you didn’t lose Bellamy in the end, what do I do?” I had grown impossibly desperate by the end. My voice growing shrill and panicked. He muttered an almost despondent ‘i dnt know’, and hung up. “thanks a lot.” I breathed. I hung my head in my hands. A pain stabbed through my chest as it heaved heavily, in and out. It was the feeling you got every time you dry heaved or sobbed for hours on end. My hands could not stop playing with whatever they could lay their fingers on. This ended up being Keith’s sweater that I was still wearing. I kept rubbing the soft material in my fingers, entwining the fabric softly and then unwinding it as quick as I had wound it. The smell of cedar wood and roses, stuck within each thread of cotton. It felt like having Keith there with me. He was leaving soon however.

I don’t know what was wrong with me. I knew he was going to leave at some point. I knew that he had been heading out more frequently to go and check out properties. Yet a part of me still hoped he wouldn’t find something he liked. Shame he did.

Could I burn the building down so that he couldn’t live there? Would I get arrested for that?

I just don’t want him to leave. He meant the world to me. He was the light that I needed in not so simple times. He guided me home. Without Keith by my side, I would have no home. It had only been six months but it had been so much longer. He couldn’t just leave me now. If he did, he would truly be gone. I dropped the cuff of the sleeve and started messing with my hands themselves. My nails digging into the soft flesh there. Indentations were made before I stopped, too scared that I would end up pressing too hard and actually causing damage. I bit my lip and bounced my leg. I couldn’t seem to stop all of these habits that younger children typically had. My leg wouldn’t stop bouncing as I continued to bite my lip and run my fingers through my hair. What if he really left, what would I do, would I care?

I needed him bad. Regardless of what the emo mullet head said, I needed him, sleeping next to me, eating, standing, dancing, kissing. It was him that I wanted. No one else could satisfy that desire. I should know, I was not a ten year old anymore, I was a thirty year old man for heaven’s sake. I could show a little familiarity of sexuality at least.

When Keith came back, his hair blew in the wind as he shut the door, causing the last few wind particles to whip his small mullet out of the way. He had decided to grow it out after I told him I wanted him to. It still wasn’t long but it was enough for me to run my fingers through and twirl the strands in my fingers. I gave him a little wave, as I continued to suck the blood from the inside of my lip from where I had bit into it over about an hour of chewing it. He waved back and walked over to me when he spotted the red pool forming on my lower lip. He ran his thumb lightly over it, collecting the scarlet liquid on his finger tip. He ran his hand under the sink to clean it off before handing me some kitchen roll. “what did you do?” he asked, concerned.

“i bit it.” I muttered, paper in my mouth.

“Idiot.” He murmured. He placed a form of paper work on the counter top. “ ‘hat hay ‘at ‘e?” I asked, the paper in my mouth, slurring the pronunciation of my words. Keith seemed to understand what I was trying to say anyway. “this?” he held up the stack of papers. I nodded. “these are the contracts for me agreeing to get the apartment that I want. I have a couple months at the most to sign them before the building goes back on the market.”

“So it’s ‘eserved ‘or you?” I carried on questioning.

“Yeah it’s reserved for me at the moment so I can decide without having the pressure of others looking at the property.” I nodded in understanding.

“Are you going ‘oo ‘ake the offer?” He shrugged.

“I don’t know yet. I’m going to give it another month and then I will decide then.” I took the paper out of my mouth then. Anxiety flooding my frame yet again. ‘i thought you said that I could have you for another few months.” He nodded. 

“i mean, once I get the place, it will take some time for me to actually move in.” He rolled his eyes at me as if it were obvious. I didn’t want him to go.

“Keith?” he hummed in response to my question. “can we head upstairs? I'm tired.” Taken by surprise, Keith didn't say no and instead fled upstairs before I did. He tugged off his jumper and beckoned for me to join him on the soft mattress. He held open his arms for me to climb into. I happily obliged. “i like you more than you realise you know.” I explained. I felt a smile against the nape of my neck as he pressed his lips there. “i like you too Lance.” He whispered. I smiled idiotically before falling asleep in the comfortable position. “i like you too...”