Agent With a Shotgun

Sixteen

It was 1 in the morning and neither Amelia or Colton had gone to sleep. After coming down from their highs, not much was said between the two. But they didn't separate from one another.

As of now they were laying in the master bed, cuddled under the white duvet comforter. Amelia had put on her underwear once again and an oversized dark gray shirt that was actually Coltons' while he had changed into a pair of sweatpants, but kept his shirt off. Amelias' right hand was placed on Coltons' chest as well as her head, her left was on her hip. Fingers intertwined with the hand Colton rested there, thumb tracing soothing circles on the skin under her shirt. His other arm was folded under his head on the pillow.

They laid there in comfortable silence for awhile before Amelia spoke, one thing on her mind.

"Did you mean what you said earlier," she asked quietly, almost fearing his answer, "when you said you loved me?" She didn't want to think that that maybe he had only said that to get in her pants, that he didn't mean anything he said to her.

However, Coltons' answer was the exact opposite of what she feared, "I meant every word I said Lia," He spoke honestly, his grip tightening on her hand, "I've always loved you. I just didn't have the courage to tell you."

Amelia relaxed slightly after hearing him speak, a small smile making its way onto her lips before dropping. He had told her the truth, and she's lying to him. She's withholding information from him on the case all because she was too scared to let her truth be known. But he deserves to know, they would never be able to fix their relationship if she continued to lie to him.

"I lied to you earlier," she spoke, nervousness evident in her voice, "about the newspaper clipping. I do know what it means." She took a chance to glance up at Colton, seeing he was already looking down at her with a look of confusion on his face.

Amelia sighed softly before pushing herself into a sitting position, pulling her knees up slightly and setting her forearms on them. She was still within arms reach of him though, she could still feel his thumb rubbing and down on her upper thigh now.

Taking a deep breath before speaking, she told him, "The letters spell out infertile. He spelled them out for me." Without turning around, she could feel his eyes staring holes into the back of her, waiting for an explanation. His thumb never stopped its movement on her thigh.

"When I was born," Amelia started with a shaky voice, fiddling with her thumbs,"I was born with a damaged uterus." She glanced down as she paused, feeling tears well up in her eyes. She had never spoken about this to anyone except her parents, feeling ashamed with herself.

She quickly wipe the stray tear from her cheek, before continuing, "The doctors didn't see it at the time because there was no indication that anything was wrong with me. I grew up a normal, healthy person, never anything wrong with me apart from the common colds or flu. That is until I got to my freshman year of high school," pausing again for a second, she took a deep breath to steady her voice again. Colton was silent behind her, letting her speak.

"I had realized that I hadn't gotten my period yet, so I brought it up to my mom. Every other girl my age had already gotten theirs either in middle school or that year, so I thought it was weird mine hadn't started yet," she continued, "she assured me that there was nothing to worry about, that some girls just start later than others. So I went on with my life, thinking that maybe I was just a late bloomer and that it would start within the next year or so.

"But when I hadn't gotten my period by the time I graduated and began to start college, that's when I started worrying. I made an appointment with a doctor and after doing all these different ultrasounds and tests the finally told me that my uterus was damaged in the womb but they weren't sure how," Amelias' eyes watered more as she remembered everything she's been hiding and going through for years, "I can't have kids." She finally said, glancing over her shoulder at Colton. Her lips flattening into a sad smile.