This Is Forever.

My Love.

God how could she have let this happen, she had been so good, so good at keeping herself under control and now out of no where everything hit her like a god damn train. All Lexa could see was red, straddling the blonde she hated so much all she wanted to do was kill.

" Lex.." Clarke tried talking slow steps towards where the two of them were lying on the ground, she could tell that it was going to be hard getting Lexa to let go, to get her to relax and come back to her.

The brunette didn't move she didn't look at Clarke, she didn't even hear anything. Her ears were ringing and her body was on fire she had so much power so much anger in her she just wanted to beat on Niylah but sitting over the blonde staring into those brown eyes she could see the fear.

Growling Lexa moved her forearm over Niylah's throat putting down pressure, she couldn't stop the memory from going over and over again in her mind. Her touching Clarke, her having a tight grip on her arm holding her tight, her trying to kiss Clarke.

Then suddenly she was brought back to reality when she felt a soft hand on the back of her neck, " Lexa, let her go..she's not worth it." Lexa knew Clarke was right Clarke was always right, but she couldn't let this go.

She pushed down harder on Niylah's throat staring into her eyes as she watched the girl struggle to breath, she could feel her kicking at the ground trying to get away but Lexa was bigger and much much stronger. 

Clarke could tell this really wasn't going to be easy, she knew that Lexa was in a really dark place right now but deep down Clarke knew that if she tried hard enough she could get Lexa out, " Lex please, just come on why don't you and I go on a walk."

" She hurt you!" Lexa growled not looking away from Niylah.

" I know but she's drunk, she didn't know what she was doing. Please just leave her alone we can go in-"

" Why are you defending her! There is no excuse for hurting someone even if she is drunk!" Lexa could feel the rage starting to come back.

Clarke needed to do something, she needed to detract the brunette get her Lexa back, she thought for a moment until she tried something. Sliding her fingers onto the back of Lexa's neck she played with the baby curls at the base of the brunettes neck. She could slowly feel Lexa stop tensing and relax into her touch, leaning down she got onto her knees and leaned her forehead against Lexa's temple, " I'm okay, I'm right here let her go Lex..let her go. I need you, just you I want you to hold me....please can we just go inside, I just want you to hold me."

Hearing Clarke's plea she sighed closing her eyes before releasing Niylah standing up she heard her start to gasp for air. Finally looking up she could see everyone standing around them, looking in...shock? Fear? realizing what she had done she spun to face Clarke hoping she wouldn't get the same reaction. She didn't reach for the blue eyed girl to afraid of getting rejected she waited, she waited for several seconds until the blonde finally took her by her hand bringing her into her embrace hugging her tightly never wanting to let go.

" Why don't we go inside and go to bed." Clarke said pulling away.

" No it's okay I can sleep by the fire tonight, you and Madi can have the bed you'll be more comfortable." It wasn't that Lexa didn't want to be with Clarke it was the fact that she was just at her girlfriends ex's throat and literally almost killed her. Lexa loved Clarke but she knew that she pushed the line tonight, and she wanted to give Clarke some space to think.

Trying to pull out of Clarke's release to move to the fire she found that she couldn't move. Clarke had wrapped her arms around Lexa's torso and buried her face into the brunettes neck, " Stay..please I don't want to sleep alone tonight." Lexa wanted to scream yes but didn't.