You Complete Me [Jemily]

Recovery

TW! flashbacks to sexual assault

October 23, 2018
Yesterday was my appointment with the therapist that JJ found for me, and it went pretty well overall. It felt freeing to get some things off my chest, and she gave me some good advice to try and move on from what happened. She agreed it might take another few days for JJ and I to be sexual again, but that we could try it whenever I feel comfortable. I've been working from home since the night of my abduction, trying my best to stay focused and get at least a little work done while I'm on leave. That seemed extra hard for me today for some reason, as I spaced out for the fourth time this morning.

While I was blankly staring out the window, JJ called to me from the doorway, "Emily?"

I whipped my head in her direction, "Hmm?"

"You okay?"

"Yeah just uh, I keep spacing out today."

"That's all right, bad brain days happen. Why don't you take a break?"

"That's a good idea," I closed my laptop and set it on my nightstand.

JJ asked, "Want some company? You know Henry's been pretty clingy since we told him what happened." That was true. Henry came back from Rossi's the morning after my abduction. He stayed with Krystall overnight when Dave came to help with the case, but they waited to tell him what happened so that JJ and I could do it ourselves. Ever since then, he's been like my third leg.

I nodded and rubbed my eyes, "Yeah sure he can come in here." JJ waved him into our bedroom and he ran inside with an armful of toys. He gently climbed onto the bed and dumped everything— a puzzle, his iPad, some stuffed animals, etc.

He crawled over to me and sat in my lap, "Hi Emmy... Awe you still hurt?" He's asked me that every day.

I giggled, "I'm doing a lot better, bubs. What'd you bring me?"

He grabbed his puzzle, "Wanna do dis wit me?"

"Sure, little man." He smiled widely and excitedly carried the puzzle over, plopping himself next to me.

He grabbed the remote off JJ's pillow and handed it to me, "Can I watch TV?" I said yes and turned on cartoons for him as we did the puzzle. Well, he just picked up the pieces and asked me where they went. About halfway through, I heard JJ making her way up the stairs from the kitchen.

She walked in with a bowl of cut up strawberries, "Snack?"

Henry snatched the bowl and dug in, "Tanks Mommy!" JJ and I laughed as his face almost immediately became coated in red, strawberry juice. I looked up at her as she lovingly played with my hair and deterred it away from my face.

Suddenly, Henry started tugging on my shoulder, "Emmy, Emmy! Where does dis piece go?"

"Well that piece has some clouds on it. Where do you usually see clouds?"

"Da sky."

"Yeah, so that piece must go somewhere on the top, right?" He furrowed his brows and looked at the puzzle for a few seconds before confidently placing the piece down in the correct spot. I smiled at him, "There ya go! Good job, buddy!" His self-pride caused him to break out into a cluster of giggles as he moved on with the rest of the puzzle.

JJ beamed at me, "I love this."

I asked her, "Hmm? What?"

"Seeing both of my babies getting along. He's so happy when he's with you."

I blushed, "I guess I have a soft side, huh?"

"Ummm, yeah I'd say so, Em." She kissed me on the forehead before stepping a few feet away to lounge on the loveseat in our room. I turned my attention back to Henry, helping him figure out the final few pieces of the puzzle.

When the last one was in place, I exclaimed, "Look at that, it's done!"

Henry laughed and looked at me, "Yay! We did it, Momma!" JJ perked her head up as I gasped.

I grinned, "D-Did you just call me... 'Momma?'"

Henry put his head down, "Sowwy, Emmy."

I laughed and picked his chin up, "No, no, Henry it's okay! It's okay! You can call me Momma if you want to!"

"I can?"

I scooped him up into my lap, "Of course you can!"

"Can I-Can I call you both? So yer Emmy or yer Momma?"

I kissed the top of his head, "Whatever you want, bubs." He giggled and wrapped his little arms around my neck, hugging me tightly. I glanced over at JJ and saw her tearing up at the interaction. I chuckled, "Aww, baby, come hereee!" She smiled and bounced over to us, hugging us both. The image probably looked like something out of a cheesy rom-com but I guess that's the vibe we created.

Later that night
After JJ fixed dinner and we all finished eating, we sent Henry to bed and then headed into our own room for the night. JJ was currently straddling my lap with her arms draped over my shoulders as we made out. This is the most I've been able to do so far, but tonight I felt like going further. I reached my hand up and started to pull JJ's flannel off her shoulder.

She pulled away and looked at me, "What are you doing?"

I kissed her jawline back toward her ear, "Taking your clothes off."

"Y-You're ready?"

"I wanna try."

She panted as I kissed down to her collarbone, "Okay... We'll go slow, yeah?"

I pulled a nipple into my mouth and hummed around it, "Mmhmm." She reached up and tangled her fingers in my hair, gently keeping my head against her chest. I reached down and pulled my shirt off, which caused JJ to ask, "Are you okay?"

As I laid back onto the bed and pulled JJ on top of me, I said, "Yes... We can keep going." JJ nodded and kissed me passionately as I rubbed over her back. She moved down to my neck and started to palm over my bare breasts. I audibly gasped at the sensation and started to panic, getting flashbacks to the horrific night I experienced days before. JJ didn't hear me, so she kept palming as she buried her face in my neck.

I panted, "J-JJ, JJ... S-Stop!"

She looked up at me, breathing hard and apologizing as she tried to catch her breath, "I-I'm sorry, what's wrong baby?"

"I-I'm not ready yet, we have to stop... P-Please can we just... stop."

She pulled her flannel back over her shoulders and sat up, "Em, it's all right we can wait."

I started to sob softly, not being able to hold back my tears, "B-But I'm s-sorry, I know this isn't f-fair to you!"

She chuckled lightly, "Emilyyyy," and got up to sit next to me. She pulled me into her arms as I continued to cry into her chest. She smoothed over my hair and whispered, "Shhh shhh, baby, it's okay it's okay. It's over, just take some deep breaths... We can wait as long as you need to, Em."

I sniffled against her, "Aren't you mad?"

"Mad? Why would I be mad? I don't want to rush you into having sex again if you're not comfortable, and if that means waiting for you then that's what I'll do."

"You're sure?"

"Of course, my love."

I sighed into her chest, "I love you so much... And you smell really good by the way."

She giggled, "Whatever helps you sleep at night, Em."