i feel bad because i haven't written an actual one shot for them in like a month, so here's SOMETHING. sorry for the lack of content i just wrote seven chapters of a brand new fic even though i know i should do this one. sorry sorry sorry i promise this one will be updates but for now i'm just giving you more incorrect quotes because they're easy and funny and i like writing them </3
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owen: request for you not to act like a dumbass bitch on today's mission?
curt, on his seventh coffee in an hour: request denied
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cynthia: just try some simple flirting, you'll be fine!
owen: okay!
*five minutes later*
owen: curt, high five!
curt: *high fives owen*
owen: *laces their fingers together* i'm in love with you
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cynthia: so, are you seeing someone?
curt: uh no, not really, why?
cynthia: i don't know, i just feel like a therapist could really help you sometimes.
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curt: i want some plant soup.
tatiana: what
curt: plant. soup.
tatiana: what
owen, sighing: he means. he wants tea.
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dog: *barking*
curt: man i wish he'd stop barking
owen: i'll fix it
owen: *starts barking back at the dog* woof
dog: woof
owen: he says he doesn't want to stop barking
curt:
curt:
curt: what the hell.
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owen: *stupidly flirting with curt*
curt: *flirts back*
owen:
curt:
owen:
curt: well, you're not gonna say anything?
owen, panicking: i don't know, i didn't think i'd get this far!
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susan: it always seems you favor one spy over the other, cynthia, ma'am.
cynthia: of course not, i love them all equally! anyway, can you call owen and not-owen in for the briefing for me real quick?
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owen: what if the songs "it's raining men" and "let the bodies hit the floor" are the same songs from different points of view?
cynthia: owen-
curt: wait, cynthia, let him finish, he's onto something
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cynthia, angry: well well well, if it isn't curt and owen.
curt: but it is us?
cynthia: no, it's an expression-
owen: your psychological tricks can't fool us, cynthia!
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𝐭𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐨𝐧, 𝐦𝐲 𝐝𝐞𝐚𝐫 // 𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐭𝐰𝐞𝐧
Hayran Kurgu"bedroom. shower. maybe the backseat of a limousine." ------------ a collection of curt mega and owen carvour oneshots, because i'm still not over them, and probably never will be. possibly triggers for gore and maybe nsfw stuff at some point, we'll...