~•Talking to the moon•~

Chapter Seventeen

Green eyes snapped open as the memory ended,  finding himself back on the field that he was in before he lost himself to his train of thoughts.  He huffed and looked down at the brunet,  seeing that he was still asleep,  eyebrows slightly furrowed as he mumbles something out.

Something about cows.

He chuckled under his breath before standing up from his place and looking at the sun,  nodding at it for a moment before walking back to his grave.

At the same moment he left from the field's sight,  brown eyes suddenly were opened as it darted around the field after sitting up, finding himself on the same spot he passed out on and finding no one in the process. He sighed out before looking at a clock he had, placing it back down on the grass as he finishes checking the time.

A small hum escaped him as he stood up,  stretching his arms up and popping his back as he looks up at the sun, shielding his eyes from the sunlight with his arms.  It greeted him with a warm embrace, but he wasn't one for hugs.  That's why he preferred the moon.

It was silent and listened to you talk while the sun just embraces you.

He might be overreacting and making two round objects in the sky act like they were doing something, but he liked giving things more meaning behind them even if they were just two round objects in the sky. 

Giving things meaning even though it's unnecessary was something George liked doing so it could have more significance and connection to him.  He tends to forget lots of things and adding meanings to some stuff that isn't or is alive is a way of him remembering them much more easier.  There's just lots of impact in putting meanings.

Memories were like them after all,  they held lots of meanings to someone and some people like going back to them.  He wasn't one to reminisce about forgotten stuff though, like the peace inside the smp. It's been so long since he's seen and felt piece in this world.

Ever since Tommy came along the smp,  everything seemed to have went haywire with how he sided with L'manberg and fought for it.  Dream didn't like that and went on a full out war because of it.  He should've known that the power was going to take over his mind someday.

Guilt wasn't even enough to explain his feelings. It held a lot of things at once that It just wanted to burst out whenever someone asks him how he was feeling with the situation at hand.  He wanted to snap at anyone who would ask him such a stupid question. George wasn't supposed to be this emotional before,  but how could he not change when a very important person in his life was killed with no mercy nor remorse In front of him without even telling him as well?  The betrayal was just very painful to the brunet and he doesn't even know what to do with himself and the world.

Enough with the negative thoughts. He stood up straightly before patting his clothes down for any grass or dirt that clung onto his clothes while he slept. He didn't doubt it for a second since he was pretty much always tossing and turning around as he slept.  One time,  he even woke up on the floor and he didn't even feel the pain of falling on it in the first place.

Goes to show he's really a heavy sleeper.

He sighed out before looking around the field one last time for today and maybe a few weeks,  walking back to his house while stretching his arms up lazily to release his muscle's built up tension.

After that,  he went and started patting his hair down so the bed head wouldn't be that noticeable.  Not that he cared for anyone's opinions about him,  but it didn't hurt anyone by caring about himself.  If it does hurt them then it isn't his fault since he was just doing himself a favor.

And besides,  even if he did care about anyone's opinions about him,  he still wouldn't change out of this.  They took something so important from him and they think they still have power over him and his decisions? Not a chance.  He's way past exceeding everyone's expectations from him and he most certainly will forget every happy memory he had in this smp.

He held no ounce of sympathy for anyone anymore and even though he wanted to go ahead and do something about it,  he knew he can't.  He's powerless and he doesn't even have any items to begin with.  Everyone had netherite armor and he didn't even have any sword tools or armor for that matter. He'd be stupid to try and think he'd have a chance against them.

For now,  they knew that he wasn't going to attack any of them and it'll stay that way until he finds something out that will be beneficial to him and only him.  He'd stay as a victim for as long as possible.

He scoffed to himself,  rolling his eyes afterwards.  How ironic was it that he didn't want to be called a victim before now he's using that to his advantage.  I guess death really does change someone for the worst.

It didn't take long for him to realize he needed to make a mask that can socially hide his true feelings towards the world.  He thought about which emotion should suit his personality best and he decided on basing it on his aloof one back then, acting stupid or careless about the whole situation.

He's going to act like he didn't care about his best friend.  It hurt him,  of course,  but he had to sacrifice his feelings for now to save his best friend.

Regret was on his face as he continued to walk, knowing that he had a shot on changing everything for the better if he'd just acted on it.

If he was just brave enough to not doubt himself of his actions and thoughts,  this wouldn't have happened.