Cowgirls Don't Cry

CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE - JESSE

I should have been excited to be at states, especially with the chance to place without the older boys in the running, but the emptiness in my chest consumed every other good emotion I had. I shouldn't have snapped at Katie again, and I should have apologised, should have tried to talk to her, to fix things, but the truth was, I just didn't know how.

Nothing I could say would make her listen, nothing would bring back the old Katie, or convince her to stand up for herself. I was beginning to realise that nothing but her own decision could change this, no matter what I said or did, and it was all I could do just to wait and hope she came to her senses.

Lost in thought on my way to the rodeo office, I nearly ran into Luke and Alex, coming back the other way.

"Hey, Jess," Alex grinned, sorting through a stack of competition paperwork he'd just collected, and handing some over to Luke. "How's it going?"

"Alright," I managed to match his smile. "Couple more hours till the bulls, right?"

"Yeah, not long now," Luke replied, juggling the stack of forms Alex had handed him, trying not to drop any in the dirt. "Alex and I reckon we'll head down to watch the steer wrestling rounds later on, if you wanna join us?"

"Sounds good," I answered, chuckling as Luke tried in vain to make sense of the multitude of entry and safety forms he'd been handed to fill out. "Better take them to someone who can read, Lukie, maybe your Dad can help?"

"Ah, shut up, they're harder than they look," Luke retorted, his brown eyes dancing. "You off to pick up your paperwork now?"

"Yeah, Dad sent me to get all of ours; him, Kit, Hallie, Cash and Kacey included," I replied, wondering at how they expected me to safely collect and sort through all those forms, while they sorted out the horses and equipment.

"Good luck with that, then," Alex grinned. "We're struggling and we've only got our own to take care of!"

I laughed, and waved goodbye to the pair of boys as I headed towards the Georgia State Rodeo office building, the front desk manned by a pair of middle aged women as they served the long line of competitor after competitor, handing out forms, warnings, numbers, rulebooks and advice in a constant stream of chatter.

We'd arrived at the rodeo grounds last night, travelling with two horses and the whole family, and had set up camp in the massive field behind the actual competition grounds, along with hundreds of other competitors. The event as a whole lasted ten days, but all the juniors events were over the first two, meaning we could get back in time for school and work.

Even though it was still the early hours of the morning, the rodeo grounds were already flooded with crowds of riders, officials, families, visitors and a multitude of stalls selling everything from craft and food to horse tack and cattle feed.

Joining the end of the office line, I looked out over the grounds as it snaked forwards towards the front desk, and took in the familiar buzz of a rodeo ground. I loved this atmosphere, the electric feeling I got right before a ride, and the noise of the crowds and livestock filling the air as the early morning light filtered over the grounds. Even though I was only a junior, and I couldn't compete professionally yet, riding at states was still a great opportunity to test my skills and rack up some points for my overall tally, going towards the end-of-season awards handed out for the juniors.

Dad, Kit and Kacey were staying the full week, to compete for PBR and watch some of the other professional leagues, but Momma had been adamant that Cash, Hallie and I had to get back to school on Monday, staying only for the weekend.

The line dwindled in front of me, and I finally reached the front desk, and the fierce older woman behind it, dressed as an official and complete with her headset and cowboy boots. I told her Dad's name, then the rest of ours, and she handed over a stack of paperwork to fill out and return before the rounds, along with a set of competition numbers.