404

Heart's Mirror

As I look over to the side whilst I get my lost lunch bag, a message caught my eye. It was printed on one of the T-shirts I saw hanging by my lunch bag. The shirt was all wrinkled up and the print on it was slowly fading by still somewhat visible, but somehow, it still caught my eye. This old and dirty shirt simply said, "Forgive and Be Better". I couldn't count how many times I've seen Forgive and Forget on people's shirts but this... This didn't say... forget...

After that, I proceeded to leave the Lost and Found office as I've found my lunch bag and hurriedly went straight for my classroom. As I watch my clock slowly tick towards 7:30, I remembered the words the shirt had on it. "Forgive and Be Better"... Be better? Better at what? You can't better the situation if you're the problem... It's not possible... neither is forgiveness. I've longed for this... For the day I could be among people and be happy like them... and what happened? What did they do? They devastated it... No! I devastated it! Of all the action I could've taken, I chose to talk face-to-face to the ones I knew bullied Emma. If there's an award for dimwittedness, my face would be plastered all around with gold frames...

While I walk towards my classroom, I saw kids playing in the hallway. Their shoes screeching as they run to and from each other. Their laughs echoing down the hall to the students at the end. Black jacket, bent over, phone in hand, and headphone on their ears, unbothered by all these. Some sitting down, some leaning on the wall, and some just laying down with their heads on their bags unfazed by it all. But their eyes... the darkened under eye, the lazy eyelids covering their eyes as they frantically move around looking at their screens. All seemed well outside... I don't so much inside.

When I got to my classroom, instead of entering it, I just observed. Through the glass window, I observe as they take their seats while talking to one another. Why do they seem so unbothered by what's going on? As they talk and show pictures to each other, their smiles portray nothing but... happiness? I then looked over in front to where Emma sits down and observe her while she eats a chocolate bar as she reads her book. She looked so calm and collected as she looks over each page, turning them one by one. She seems... okay, and I'm glad that's the case. But before I opened the door to let myself in, I saw Stella. She's never been this early before? What's gotten into her? Although, she is smiling which is not very unusual for her. She still looked unfazed while she laughs with that obnoxious voice of hers. But as much as I want to revoke her, my mouth seemed to go limp and quiet. I- I'm not afraid of her. If anything, I- *sigh* Why can't I hate her?

I then proceeded to enter the classroom before the clock hits 7:30 and the bell rings. I went straight to the back seat and pulled out my notebook. However, before I even sat down, I saw a note on my desk. "Mishaps are not always deserved." the note said.

"Mishaps are deserved when you're the one who caused it. " I said quippingly annoyed as I crumple it and threw it in my bag.

I then sat down and started writing in my notebook. All the assignments, quizzes, and projects, due this week, are scheduled properly on their respective dates and times. Each day is planned out accordingly but not perfectly. Each page having at least two markings of thin paper. Its texture softer than the rest of the paper, its strength more fragile than the rest of the page... Each circle reminiscent of the drop that was once fell on it. A drop from the same person who made it neat and beautiful...

The clock now at 7:35 and our teacher just walked in with a clipboard in her hand. As I get ready to raise my hand for the attendance the teacher announced something...

"Okay class, today is a little different. We decided to postpone all your work for just this morning, judging by the fact that you all have seemed to finish them, and each one of you will be going to one of our Guidance Councilors. So in the meantime, do whatever you want but keep quiet." She said as she sits down at her desk and fixes her paper.