It's awful, I know I say it a lot but I just don't think it's going to work out anymore. Everything I do, everyone I know, I am bound to hurt them in some way.
My little brother, the person I love the most. I am absolutely toxic for him. I need to do better but I can't. I'm soo fucking sorry I always fuck up something nice. I wish was a better sister.
Just a better person really. I always end up pushing away people that I love and it hurts to see them in pain but I can't help it. I'm a fucking tornado and I am bound to destroy everything in my path no matter what. Doesn't matter how affectionate I am towards someone or something, I am the definition of the devil. A sadist.
I'm sorry. I really am.
Idk if the future me is reading this or even alive to be able to read this. I just want to know. Does it get better?
I'm sorry for everything I've done. I'm sorry for ruining the lives of people I actually love. I'm sorry for being the way I am. I'm sorry for fucking apologizing all the damn time but it feels right and idgaf.
I wanna km yk. Things would be better and easier if I didn't exist. Everyone would be safer. Everyone would be happier. But i know or well i hope it's my mind playing games.
I want to feel peace. I'm sorry for being a fucking tornado. I'm sorry.
I wish i could send this to my mother without sending it to my mother. If I'm dead and you're reading this mum. I'm sorry. Tell my brother i love him and it wasn't his fault.
I was doomed from the start.
I'm sorry.
YOU ARE READING
Just Me Ranting
Non-Fictiondon't read it lmao, it just felt calming to post it as a book or whatever. TW if your sorry ass is reading this, mentions of su!c!dal thoughts and self h@rm.
