Mouse

chapter eight

Lisa and Benny made up of course. As I suspected Lisa was just waiting for Benny to make the first move, she made him grovel a bit, but by the end of the week they were all lovey dovey again.

I was sitting outside sewing with my Aunt Lizzie and a few other women who were helping her make up the new costumes, and I watched Lisa and Benny who were not too far away, their arms wrapped around each other and laughing, appearing to only have eyes for each other.

I suddenly felt a little wistful, wondering what it would be like to have someone who romantically cared about me that way?

For some reason Paul's face came into my head. I felt the colour rush to my cheeks, shocked with myself that my mind was even straying in that sort of area.

I glanced up, but I was happy to see my aunt and the other women were too busy talking to each other to pay me any attention

I realised I had get a grip on myself, Just because Paul was the friendly sort and was nice to me, it didn't mean anything, he was probably like that with everyone.

I had expected him not to bother with me again after that first incident when I bumped into him. But twice since then I had met him again, and he took the time to stop chat with me

It was a novelty, no one had ever really taken the time to bother with me in that way

And I was still trying to figure out why he was different with me. Perhaps it was because he was new to the circus, and he was totally unfamiliar with my past and background, so none of that mattered to him.

Our last conversation had just been a few days ago, and he had been telling me a bit a bout his background I knew he came from Leeds in England and he was twenty three, he had two older brothers.

He then told me all about his time training in the circus school and some of the funny incidents that had occurred and I found myself laughing, as I exchanged some tales I had witnessed myself over the years in the circus.

He had told me I was very pretty when I smiled, and that I should do it more often.

Even now thinking about it I felt my face heat up betraying. I was just not used to people paying me any sort of compliments.

He had sensed he had embarrassed me and had hastily apologised, making a light of it. So the awkward moment passed as if it had never happened. I assumed he knew I was married to Ricardo, and strangely enough his name never came up in our conversations. I wondered how much he had heard through the local gossip grapevine

It worried me that once he realised how other viewed me, he would just treat me in the same way. But that was not the case, he was always friendly and approachable a refreshing change from my husband.

I discovered it was nice to have someone to talk to other than the horses.

But I had to keep myself in check, and not let my feelings run away with me either, which I found they could easily do when I was around Paul, and was why I had decided that I shouldn't become too over friendly with him.

And most of all I shouldn't be daydreaming about him either, so I turned my attention back to the conversation my aunt and the others were having, forcing myself to pretend I was interested.

Then there was Ricardo, my so-called husband, who for the most, continued to ignore me. Though when we were forced to spend time together, he made sure that we were very rarely alone in each other's company.

So most of our meal times were spent with his family, which was still a little awkward still for me with his mother still throwing hints about grandchildren He seemed to not pick up on it or easily ignore the hints, not so much for me though, which was why when Ricardo announced we would be spending time with his family one particular evening, I decided to dare express my reluctance, telling him I preferred to eat alone for a change