Teach Me To Be Gay (BoyxBoy)

Part Twenty-five

That scowl comes paired with those eyes. Those eyes that I swear I saw staring at me and Kade a while ago. And I’m also pretty sure that those eyes and that scowl also come paired with a bunch of terrible texts. Not that there’s really much that I can do to stop the damned messages. Although, maybe knowing that I’m finally out of the closet will stop the text messages. 

Somehow, I doubt it.

At home, I sigh aloud, albeit not even realising I am. This earns two arms being wrapped around my waist, allowing me to sink back into a feeling of pure comfort and safety.

"What's up, honeybee?" This causes me to turn around in Kade's arms, giving him a look of disbelief, my eyebrow raising a little. Typically, he only gives me a questioning look in return, as if 'honeybee' is perfectly normal between the two of us. 

"Honeybee... honeybee... honeybee? Really?" I try to get used to the sound of the word on my tongue, but it sounds weird. "You do know you're making me sound like a girl and-"

My words are cut short as he lifts me up off the ground, spinning me around in the large space that is our lounge. His hands have a firm grip on my waist as he holds me horizontally, my left hip resting slightly on his shoulder.

“You, Justie, are most definitely the girl of the relationship.” I can practically feel the smirk taking over his lips as he gradually lets me slide down till my feet touch the floor. The way he positions me as I get down has our bodies rubbing against each other, and I know it was a purposeful action. A smile makes its way onto my face at that.

It kind of reminds me of one of those moments in a movie – the tension is thick in the air as eyes lock and heart beats come together as one and it feels like magic is standing right there in that moment. It’s perfection. Perfection here is defined by a simple moment in time where everything seems to come together with a simple kiss.

We’re both slowly leaning in, my hand reaching up to latch itself to his hair, his hands securely sitting on either side of my waist. I know it sounds stupid, but this feels like the moment.  The moment where everything falls into place and things start to feel okay again.

Our lips touch. All I can register is a mixture of sweet bliss and a lust so prominent that I need to answer it. So, I take control, my hands moving down his back, my legs guiding him to the sofa and my heart wanting more, always more.

His back hits the sofa and he’s kissing me back ferociously, letting me know that he wants it, too.

But then I realise. This is my head speaking – the part of my head that strives for sex and adventure – it isn’t me. My heart is willing me to wait for that perfect moment, and I know I need to.

“Wait.” Kade’s the one to stop us, and, in all honesty, I’m thankful. “Justin, not now, I want to make it special.”

I smile at him, my grin only confusing him as he gives me a questioning look. “Same here. I’m not quite ready, I don’t know what got into me.” He smiles right back at me, understanding. A chuckle escapes me lips before he pulls my head down to kiss him again.

This kiss is short and sweet and over too soon, but then he does the one thing that makes my heart melt in my chest. He holds my head in his hands, looking at me in a way that has me knowing he’s dead-serious over his next words. “I love you, you know that, right?”

And there it is, that feeling of wholeness, which has me smiling like a looney as he fiddles with the bottom of his shirt, averting his eyes. Placing my thumb gently under his chin, I tilt his head upwards a little until he’s looking at me. I’m still smiling, and he only looks slightly confused. “I know Kade, and I love you back. So fucking much.” It’s something that I feel I need to make clear to him somehow – I love him. I would scream it from the rooftop if I had to.