𝑾𝑰𝑺𝑯 𝒀𝑶𝑼 𝑾𝑬𝑹𝑬 𝑮𝑨𝒀 ❶ - { fₑₘ. ʟᴏᴠᴇ ɪɴᴛᴇʀᴇꜱᴛ} ✔

2 : ᴅᴏɴ ' ᴛ ʙᴇ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ᴡᴀʏ .

don't reject me, don't reject me...please

she was my sanctuary, her light protected me from the darkness of the world and my own self-deprecation. as my mother drove me home in an angry silence, it was evident how vulnerable and weak i was without her. i was the bane of her existence, my mother, she knew who i was. ironically enough, she was the first person i told when i came out. 

i was 14 at the time i told my mother that i was a lesbian. i watched many 'coming out reaction' videos, to prepare myself. it wasn't enough, after i told my mother...she shattered me. with just one simple word.

liar.

the drive home was tense, i tried my best to shrink myself, so she wouldn't have to acknowledge me. i stayed in the car fidgeting with my cross-necklace as she left to open the door, i waited an additional two minutes, so i wouldn't have to stand near her as she opened the front door. avoiding my mother was my only option. except at dinner, dinner was the only time she would breath a word to me, and those words were not ones i'd want to hear.

we sat at the table, her eyes boring into my head. i tried my best to ignore it, but her disgusted glare made my skin crawl and the silence only made it worst.

"mama um, did you have a good day at work-"

she cut me off with a sharp expression, causing the words to die in my throat. "do you know why your father left? left me. left you." my eyes widened, she had never talked to me about my father before. he left when i was 7, haven't heard from him since. "well do you?"

"uh n-no."

"he left for another partner," her voice went monotonous, "he's a cheater, an imbecile, and a liar..." her tired eyes glinted with anger. "like father like daughter." she spat.

"what did he lie about?" i asked, but her emphasis on that wretched word told me everything.

"he lied about his sins, he lied to me, to god!" she banged her hand on the table. i flinched and cringed at the clatter of loose silverware. "he left me for a man! he's diseased, just as you are."

"m-mama, i'm not diseased! liking girls didn't change me, i'm still me. i'm still your daughter-" tears welled in my eyes as my mother silenced me with the palm of her hand. i couldn't move, couldn't think. i could only feel the hot sting that struck my cheek.

"never say that. you are no longer a daughter of mine. you chose the devil's path, now walk in it." she reached over and grabbed my necklace, ripping it off me. hot and salty tears streamed down my face, i had nothing to say besides sobs. i ran out the kitchen and out of the house, i ran without a destination, but my legs knew where to carry me.

they carried me to her.