Help?

𝐀ll the reasons

One, it's not like anyone would miss me. Mom and dad don't even spare me a second glance. Kenma and Kuroo barely invite me anywhere. The kids at school don't like me. The staff don't do anything. And why bother with online friends.

Two, it's not like I'd miss them. I don't feel any sort of connection to anyone. Not friendship, love, nothing.

Three, I'd be free?? I don't know. I can't imagine what freedom would feel like.

Well, I know I'd be free from bullying and neglect. But after getting treated like that for a while, I can't imagine what it's like without.

It's like an accidental addiction.

Or an accidental pregnancy that you have no clue what to do about.

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My grounding is over now.

After I went to Kenma's house after a small argument. I got grounded.

I understand why their mad. Their own child leaves home without an explanation.

But I'm my defense, I needed to get away from the thick atmosphere. Even at the littlest things, they will snap at when they're mad.

This one time I was washing dishes and I forgot about this one mug and left. Mom called me downstairs and yelled at me. There was nothing else in that clean sink but that mug.

As a small child at the time, I felt super guilty, kinda confused at what was the big deal, but guilty.

Speaking of guilty, that's exactly what those kids at school want me to feel.

Feel guilty for them tripping over air, for not doing their work and then they fail, them getting bad grades on tests, not wanting to hang out with them.

At first I didn't realize this was their way of getting me to do things for them. But after a few late nights at 3am, my blanket and my thoughts, I'd realized.

I think they didn't want me to realize so they keep coming after me, to get me back in their clutches.

But that's just a theory of mine. I honestly don't know why their obsessed with me. If someone legit came up and asked, what do they have against me. I wouldn't have a clue.

But what hurts me is how someone can see me in a situation like that, and just leave me.

Especially when it's someone that's supposed to care for you.

I know Kenma "broke up" with me, but he should at least care for me as an individual and human being.

Back when we were dating, I'd never bring him to a crowded place. We'd always stay home for dates, because that was what he was comfortable with.

It was always what he wants, but never me.

It's always what they want, and never how I feel.

But then again, it's how they all think. No one wants to get to know me, so they just assume what I'm like, and judge me off of their assumptions.

That should be my one major reason for leaving.

One, two, three, good enough for me
But what if it's not good enough?
Are those the only reasons I have?
Maybe I should wait for more...