in the name of fritz / the crown

Chapter Fourteen: If It's Over

For many years, she's been locked away - always alone, hidden in plain sight before masses of people. Often she can be found looking out of windows with a large frame, staring at an empty rope swing swaying from a lone tree against a pink and orange dusk sky at that farm. Or else she's raking up fallen autumn leaves, watching her younger siblings jump in puddles on the gravel road. She's walked up to her father in tattered clothing, holding a bucket full of water, waiting and wanting to be noticed by him as his own. Sometimes she is caught in a rare moment of joy when her sister calls for her to play.
Always she lingers, though, as a dull longing behind (Y/N)'s eyes. She's been scared and alone for so long, and yet through all the darkness, she's never lost her light. She has made herself known. Her yearning seen just by the glint of the jewels on her crown. Millions of people know of her, but have never known her.
She is little (Y/N), or what is remained of her.

"I'm three weeks pregnant."

Rod felt her words sting his brain like a bee.

"And it's yours..."

Her loving touch as she said those words.

"This baby will be our future."

The glimmer of hope in her beautiful eyes.

"Are you happy?"

It was all a mistake. This affair. Her pregnancy. Her falling madly in love. Everything. Rod's face lost all color as he collapsed onto the hay bale beneath him. He grabbed his head, tugging at his hair, eyes widening in fear. He groaned in frustration,
"No..." He muttered underneath his breath.
Maria reached her hand out to place it on his shoulder, but he slapped it away. He looked up at her, his face washed with anger,
"Get rid of it." He said.
She gasped silently,
"A-Aren't you supposed to be happy?!" She exclaimed, "This is your baby!"
"Illegitimate baby!" He yelled, "My wife should be the one to give birth to my first child, not a lowlife like you!"
"You-...How dare you!"
Maria raised her hand and slapped him hard across his face, pushing him back down on the hay bale right after,
"I thought we were in love, Rod." She said, "You promised me that we would be together."
He rubbed the spot where she had slapped him, feeling the burn from it,
"I was a fool." He said, turning his head to look up at her, "And so were you..."
She shook her head,
"No, you weren't a fool..." She started, "You were and still are that manipulative man I first met..."

Tears formed in her eyes before they started pouring down her dark-skinned cheeks like a waterfall,
"A-And I fell into y-your trap..." Maria cried, "You k-knew that I-I needed s-somebody!"
She tried to wipe away the tears but they kept falling,
"At least..." She started, "A-At least tell me t-that you loved me."
Rod stood up from the hay bale and walked up to her shaking form. He looked down at her in disappointment and shame, while she looked down at the ground to avoid his gaze. He placed his hand on her shoulder, gripping it,
"How could anybody fall in love with a slave?" He said before pushing her away.
Maria collapsed onto her knees, with one hand in the green grass and the other cupping her mouth to silence her sobbing. His footsteps faded into the night, and so did her cries.

Her pregnancy was tough. Nobody was there for her. Nobody cared for her. And nobody knew what to do with her afterwards. The week before she was due to give birth, Maria slid down against the unstable barn wall and protectively placed her hands over her stomach. She muttered a short prayer, a ritual prayer, before everything faded into a haze. All she saw before bed that night was a crown on a woman's head with the founder hugging her, fading into her, and becoming one with her. It was a vision, a future reality, of how the queen will stop the world from ending.

The cries of a baby ringing out in that same barn, a week later, brought back that same vision. Maria named her newborn daughter: (Y/N).

The relationship of (Y/N) and Levi was what she dreamed of with her relationship with Rod. The queen knew that for sure before her mother started to suffer from dementia. The telling of her hardships that she suffered through during her pregnancy was horrible compared to (Y/N)'s. Now five months of being pregnant, she was happier than ever. She had a family who loved her. A whole country that loved her. And allies that had her back no matter what. She was what her mother envisioned her to be. But there still was that sadness hanging over her like a dark cloud.
It was nearing five in the afternoon. The sky turned into a mixture of blues with a dark pink, and its colors reflected off of the big windows of the government building. Today was the last meeting about Marley before the attack next month. The commander's of each branch, its top officers, and government officials, attended it. It was held in a military meeting room, as usual. (Y/N) took her seat at the big wooden table at the front of the room, next to her husband and Zackly. Once she got comfortable, she looked up at everybody in front of her,
"You may be seated." She said.
The shuffling of chairs and people sitting down filled the silence of the room before the meeting finally started.