DEFENCE // LARRY STYLINSON // LOUIS TOMLINSON

24.

Harry P.O.V
Three Weeks Earlier

I can't exactly explain the way I am feeling right now. I'm going through the worst heartbreak I could ever imagine, but yet I'm feeling the most content I've ever felt. I don't understand it.

I've never once before felt contentment in my life before, I always had this strange guard up inside of me that refused to let anyone in. I knew I was safe. You don't give people the power to destroy you, it's an idiotic move to make. But with everything that was happening with Kasey, it's like something just evaporated inside me. That wall just no longer existed.

But I was not prepared for its fall, and it's like all emotion that I had once run from, overwhelmed me in an instant and I felt, pain. I felt pain like I've never felt before. Losing Kasey, that pained me than I was prepared for.

But with the matching amount of pain I felt, I was experiencing an emotion that was even more overwhelming. An emotion I wasn't aware of, I didn't know about the weight until it came hitting me like a freight train.

That feeling of free falling and enjoying the fall, the feeling of vulnerability and openness, that feeling of total and utter gut wrenching devotion to one person.

Love.

I was totally and completely in love with Louis Tomlinson. I had been from the moment I laid eyes on him. The moment I felt his hand in mine. The moment I saw his smile and heard his laugh. Louis Tomlinson completely engulfed every part of me without my knowing and I can't believe I had this armour and defence up, I wish I had allowed myself to feel this sooner.

Two years of love for Louis Tomlinson has hit me in one day. One moment. And it was the moment his arms wrapped around me as I was unraveling. The moment he held me together whilst I was falling apart.

I knew right then and there how much I needed this man. How much I wanted this man.

I didn't know what I was saying until the words spilled from my lips.

We were now here, together, under one roof. As an almost family. Today I brought Willow around to the Tomlinson household to meet Hollie and Pip. I've known these girls for a long time, and thought of them as my own sisters from time to time, so I was excited to introduce them to my daughter. My little girl.

The longer we were here, the more normal it feels. The more I feel like this could work. This could be life. I definitely would never get tired of hearing Willow's laughter from Hollie's tickling or her squeals as Pip chases her through the house. Or the smile that's on all three of their faces as they laugh together at the cartoon on the television.

This is the sight of a family that both Louis and I never had. We have the opportunity to give it to these girls. Exactly what they deserve. What we deserve.

I've been able to steal a few sneaky kisses with Louis as we hide behind walls or wait til their heads are turned. It's been a while since I felt like this with Louis. Maybe I've never actually felt like this with Louis, submissive to him. I quite liked it.

No wonder he has let me dominate him for so long.

It had been planned that we would stay the night. The first night all together. Possibly the first night of the rest of our lives.