-BLOODSUCCAZ aubrey i'm summoning you back to my book
v4nityy has a new book run that shit up i endorse this message
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i guess i'd been set straight. i was still a little upset he'd lied to me but i had no choice but to move on or break up with him, and it seemed like something a little too small to end the whole relationship over now that i was actually back with him.
"bowl?" gus asked, gesturing to the bong in his hand. "sure" i said, taking it from him. it was kind of hard to spend so much time around him and not pick up a smoking habit. "i really don't want to go back to school in two months" i told him. "okay then don't" gus shrugged. "i can't just drop out" i said. "yeah you can. fuck it. who says you can't?" gus asked. "umm, myself?" i answered. "why? do you wanna be happy? why would you keep torturing yourself through something you don't wanna do?" gus asked.
"i need a job after" i told him. "okay then get a job? you don't need your biochemphysicsmathengineermedical whatever the fuck it is degree to get a job" gus told me. "i do if i want a good one" i said. he just laughed. "fuck that. i barely made it outta high school and i got fuckin bands now. fuck your stupid school. do what makes you happy. i got you baby" he said.
"gus i can't expect that of you" i said. "you're not expecting if i'm offering. i got you for real, i just want you to be happy. trust me baby it's only up from here too" gus said. "what if we break up?" i asked. he laughed again "as if" he said. "okay cher horowitz" i rolled my eyes. "isla babe i'm serious. if you don't wanna continue with school then don't. i'll take care of you, you're mine and i love you" gus told me.
"i'll have to think about it" i told him. "i don't want you to feel like i'm using you" i added. "baby i'm offering, and the hesitation tells me you aren't using me. you're thinking about it, that's fine. just want my girl to be happy is that so wrong?" he asked. "no it isn't. thank you gus, i'll think about it. that's just a lot for me to accept but i really really want out of this school. i fucking hate it" i said. "i love you too, by the way" i added.
gus took the bong back from me, packing himself a few more bowls while we just chilled on his bed. "wanna hear a song?" gus asked. "you've been working on something?" i asked. "yeah" he said. "oh, usually you tell me" i said, kind of disappointed. "i just wasn't sure how you'd feel about this one so i was waiting to show you in person" he said. "okay then" i said, waiting for him to put the song on.
he reached across the bed to the laptop on his side table, clicking through files to try and find it. "here" he said, pressing play. "we had it all planned out. babu girl what the fuck is the plan now?" i listened intently to his song. it was a slightly different sound than what i'd heard on crybaby, but i liked it. he was growing as an artist for sure.
"what do you think?" he asked as the beat faded out. "you never miss" i told him. "already ruling the whole game and im barely started. winning like im twenty two" gus said. "i'd also absolutely fuck you to that" i said. "noted" gus smirked.
"what do you wanna do today?" i asked. "get fuckin high" gus said, grabbing the bong and grinder again. "anything else?" i asked. "not really" he said. gus blew the smoke out into the room, the air starting to turn hazy. "i'm not here for long i wanna do something" i said. "you're staying" he told me. "what?" i asked. "you're staying here with me. i'm not letting you go again. it almost ended us because my life is full of fakes and crazy bitches" gus said.
"i didn't bring enough stuff" i said. "i'll come back with you to get it. never been to phoenix anyways" gus said. "so you like want me to move in with you for the summer or something?" i clarified. "exactly that" he said. "are you sure?" i asked. "can you stop with the uncertainty? i just wanna be with you and take care of you. let me" he said, almost annoyed. "oh. um, okay then" i mumbled, unable to sure it i was making him mad or not.
"good. i'll book myself a ticket for your flight home" he said. "oh, okay" i said. gus had seemed to take quite a few big steps in our relationship the last few days. he must really be getting comfortable or something, considering he's literally willing to support me so i can give up everything for him.
"do you think we're going too fast babe?" i asked. "no why? you don't wanna be with me?" gus asked. "i do" i said. "okay then shut up about it" gus snapped a little. "what's wrong?" i asked. "nothing" he said. "you seem irritated all of a sudden" i pointed out. "i just almost lost you once over my own stupid shit and now you're second guessing me. fuck i'm a fuck up" he said, rubbing his temples. "you're not a fuck up. i don't appreciate you lying but it's okay. i forgive you" i reassured him.
"you're not just gonna go home and try to leave me again?" he asked. "no. you're coming with me aren't you?" i asked, he smiled a bit. "yeah i am" he said. "as long as we don't have anything else to do with that layla bitch ever again we're gonna be just fine" i said. "she's dead to me" he said. "as she should be" i replied.
