irresistible||larry

Part 20

August 19, 5:31 am.
Two months after the collapse.

We make our own monsters and then fear them for what they show us about themself.
-Peter Gross

Seventeen is a medium number. Seventeen minutes are not a lot, but seventeen years are quite a lifetime. Seventeen weeks, on the other hand, are a hellhole. Because you never know if it's bad or good, that the patient has been in coma for seven weeks. Maybe it's too late, maybe it's still soon, but you just don't know because no one will tell you fucking nothing.

Louis had been unconscious for seven weeks, and Harry hadn't left the hospital since then. At first, He thought he wasn't going to make it. When the ambulance arrived to the hospital, Louis had already lost a lot of blood, the surgery took almost 8 hours. While Harry was waiting, he knew that Louis was already dead, he imagined himself and the boys without him, he thought he had to get use to it.

But it turned out wrong, because when the doctors came out of the room, Louis was breathing. The bullet didn't get the heart, but it was deep enough to tear apart the flesh, which the doctor said could cause really bad damage when Louis woke up, if he ever did. Now, Harry wasn't sure, but as much as he hoped for Louis to wake up, he knew he wouldn't. It was almost 6:00 am when Harry woke up. He fell asleep with his head on Louis' bed holding his hand, causing him a bad headache when he woke up. Rubbing his temples, he looked around for a clock.

Half past five. Great.

He got up to grab some water, turning on a little lamp to illuminate the room. When he got back in the bed, he sat in his chair again, just looking at his beautiful angel. His lashes were so long, and his hair was dirty, going in every direction. He was pale and his skin was dry, just like his lips. They use to be pink and full, and now all he could see was white. Harry moved a bit, and his breath itched when he noticed that Louis' eyes were a tiny little bit open. Doctor says it could happen. Still, Harry couldn't help but get closer to him, trying to understand if he was actually awake.

"Louis?" He whispered. Nothing changed. Harry whispered his name again, and his heart stopped for a second when Louis actually did nothing. He didn't believe it, but he was hoping something would happen, just because he wanted his Louis back. But then, his eyes moved from staring straight ahead to the side. It was imperceptible, really, a little movement, but Harry knew it happened.

"Oh my god, Louis? Louis can you hear me?" Harry asked again, his heart starting to beat faster and fresh tears wanting to come out.

He saw Louis moving his lips, wanting to talk, but nothing came out, just air. "Wah..." Was all Louis managed to let out, and while he tried to lick his lips, Harry got up as fast as he could to get water.

"There you go love, here it is." Harry whispered in tears as he put a hand under Louis' chin to help him drink. As he watched him, more tears were staining Harry's cheek because damn, Louis was awake.

"Ha..Harry." Louis whispered, and Harry cried more. His voice was weak and Harry could cut it with scissors, but it was there, and Louis' eyes were almost closed, fighting not to fall asleep again, but they were a bit open. Louis was there, with his mind and soul, not just his body.

"I'm right here baby, I'm right here." Harry whispered holding tight on Louis' hand, closing his eyes. "Do you need anything, my love?"

"What...happened?" Louis kept whispering, his voice getting louder and the words forming and becoming real.

"Oh, baby." Harry said, while he pushed the button to call a nurse. "You were shot, we— we thought you died." Harry cried. "We won, we won the fight, and— and we were incredible, but then you— you fell on the ground and—"

"We...won?"

"Yeah." Harry chuckled. "That's the only think you understood between all the thighs I said?"

Louis smiled. "Harry." He called, which made Harry open his eyes and look up at him. His eyes were weak, but fully open now, his lips weren't dry anymore and his skin was starting to get color. He was still pale and weak, but he was awake now.

Louis was awake.

"Are you okay?" Louis asked, and Harry chuckled at that because his Louis was worrying about him while he was laying in a hospital bed being kept awake by a fucking machine. Just then a nurse followed by Louis' doctor came in, and Harry had to get up before kissing Louis' hand.

"Hello, Louis." She smiled. "You woke up I see, how are you feeling, love?"

He let them do their job, while he waited with his arms crossed, leaning on the wall. He was watching how Louis looked so weak and tired, yet Harry didn't want to let him fall asleep, he needed to talk to him. He needed to tell him. It was now or never. The doctor told him that they would've come again in the morning, and Harry just nodded his head not taking his eyes off of Louis. As soon as they closed the door, Harry threw himself on the bed.

"Are you okay, baby?" Harry whispered, leaning his head on top of Louis' chest and interlocking their finger together.

"I'm okay." Louis said back, then sat up a bit to look at Harry in the eyes. "Harry, I— I need to tell you something."

"Me too." Harry announced with big green eyes, following the movement that Louis made to sit on the bed.

"Harry, you are a beautiful person with a magnificent heart. You are— you are kind and sweet and whoever ends up with you in life, will be the luckiest person on the planet." Harry's heart broke a little at those words. "But I saw dead and I escaped from it, and— and while I was in this line between life and dead, I regretted every single thing that I did and didn't do in my life. Now, I thought I wouldn't be able to tell you, but now I'm here, in front of you, and I— I ask you with all of my good intentions to listen closely to what I say even if I know it will have consequences. Harry." Louis looked down at Harry's hand and squeezed it. "I don't know what we were, I don't know what happened in that period of time, but there's one thing I know and that's— that's that I fell in love with you. I fell in love with you as in I want to spend the rest of my life with you, as I want to— to hold your hand and cuddle you. As I want to buy you presents and whisper I love you at night. I don't want to have meaningless sex anymore and hope that one day you'll just come over and tell me that— that you will want to make me yours. I— I needed to tell you." He took a deep breath. "And you don't have to answer, but I would hate myself if for some reason I— I die before telling you."

"Louis..." Harry trailed off. "It was never meaningless sex to me. First I liked you and then I loved you and then I fell in love with you, I learned to love the mess in your head and the little things that you appreciate in life. I fell in love with you and I regret the moment I understood that you were gone and I didn't tell you, because you deserved to know. I love every single part about you and I love how you make me feel." Harry finally looked up, finding Louis already looking at him. He leaned forward to kiss the corner of Louis' lips, in the most gentle way possible.

"I'm in love with you Harry." Louis whispered.

"I'm in love with you Louis."

That's exactly how Harry imagined it. Louis loves him. He loves Louis.

Sometimes Harry forgets that Louis is dead.