WWE Oneshots!

38 - Dear Seth Rollins... - Brollins

Trigger warnings: Attempted suicide / Suicide letters

Becky
I sat in my wwe supplied motorhome, feeling lost like I didn't belong here anymore. This has been building for a while so I knew it was only a matter of time until dangerous thoughts would fill my head. The only reason I've been hanging on this long is for Seth, I make him so happy even when I'm dying inside but I just can't do it anymore, I just can't hold on.

I walk into my kitchen and I see the three packets of some drugs I bought from the pharmacy and I feel sick as I pick up the packet, my hands shaking as I open the box. I hesitantly drop the box and I see a pen and some paper, deciding that I can't go without leaving a letter. I need him to know that I'm sorry and that I love him, I'll never be able to live with myself if I don't. Ironic really.

As I put pen to paper I just feel my tears falling. I've never felt so lost in my entire life, I just can't do it anymore. I get this horrible sinking feeling in my chest and it feels like I can't breathe and it just breaks me, it makes me not want to do this anymore because it's just not worth it.

I fold up the paper and I address it to 'Seth Rollins' I want to be sick as I place the letter down on the kitchen counter, alongside the drugs. I just want this to end, I just want this to be over because I can't take anymore and I can't give anymore. This world has broken me, I've been losing myself for months and now, well I've finally lost myself.

I pour myself a glass of water and I pop the first few pills out of the packet, I just stare at the 4 pills on my kitchen counter and I just can't hold back my sobs as I shove them all into my mouth, needing this to be over, needing to finally end my life.

I take the whole packet and it feels like I'm looking at my life through somebody else eyes, I feel free. But then it all came crashing down and I fell to the floor, feeling like the tiles were chaining me down. The only thing I could do now was sob, the deep regret sinking into the fabric of my skin as I tried to keep my eyes open, as I tried to hold on.

It felt like my life was on grey scale as everything around me got dark, I wanted to stop being lost but now I'll never be found.

Seth
I return to my motorhome, exhausted after a busy media day and I pull out my phone to text Becky. "Hey, you feeling any better? I could come round and make your favourite if you want? x" I wait ten minutes and when I still don't receive a text back from Becky I decide to go over and check on her, she's probably just asleep but considering she was sick this morning I better check to make sure she doesn't need me.

I grab her spare motorhome key off the sideboard and I quickly dash across, not wanting to get drenched by the awful weather conditions in Detroit. I unlock the door and I push it open, Becky's motorhome feels very eerily empty as I close the door behind me. I switch the light on and I look through her house to the kitchen, spotting a letter addressed to me.

I start to walk towards the kitchen and I feel my heart stop as I see the empty packet of some American pharmacy drug. There's a knocked over glass on the counter too and my heart is in my throat as I round the corner to see Becky, collapsed on the floor and I immediately fall to my knees. "Becky, hey it's me. Please wake up." I grab her wrist and her skin is cold like ice and I'm struggling to find a pulse.

With my hands trembling I pull my phone out of my pocket and I dial 999. "999, what's your emergency?" A male responder spoke down the line. "It's my friend, I just found her collapsed in her home and I think she's tried to kill herself." I was still kneeling by her side, holding one of her hands. "Okay, do you know what has happened?" The responder was very calm, while it felt like my heart was going to explode. "I think she's over dosed on something." I could barely breathe as I choked out my words. "Please she really needs help and I-can't lose her." I cried and I could hear the responder typing on his keyboard. "I've already dispatched an ambulance and they are on their way, is the patient responsive?" I looked down at Becky and I called out to her but she didn't move, it didn't even look like she was still alive. "No...no I don't think s
She's breathing! Please please please, I'm gonna lose her." I whimpered, feeling defeated as every second passed. "Try and keep calm, our team are on the way." I placed my phone down and I put it on speaker as I pulled Becky closer to me, her cold skin chilling my entire body.