The Remedy | The Untamed

Chapter 3

Huaisang lunged restlessly in his sleep. As it often happened during the years he had the same dream, that was repeating itself in a loop. It was really a nightmare. He was playing the flute, he wasn't able to stop. He could only watch his dear brother kill their clan members and then snap out of that terrible daze and Huaisang doesn't have the heart to tell him the truth, so he lies. He lies, holding his older brother in his arms, seeing him as helpless as never before.

It breaks his heart, but he doesn't dare to put this sort of guilt on his shoulders. It wasn't his fault. Nothing of this was his fault.

Then the scenery changes and he sees his brother at Koi Tower, in a state beyond terrifying, swinging Baxia and screaming. Fighting with invisible forces. Huaisang forgets how to breathe and Jin Guanyao's comforting touch on his shoulders burns like acid and makes him disgusted. He screams in pain as his brother's spirit slowly leaves his body and his eyes become lifeless, empty.

He tossed around in bed till a pair of strong arms wrapped him in a steady hug, pulling him to his chest, rocking him in his arms. His heartbeat somehow always managed to calm the other man down.

"Shhh It's okay, my love. It's just a nightmare," he whispered into his ear, although he knew pretty well it was not.

A nightmare would have been much better, because it wouldn't have been real. Those were his most painful memories and that's why it was so difficult to see him like that, so vulnerable.

The man knew it all too well, after all he also had them from time to time. As if repeating them constantly in their memory wasn't enough. He wondered if Wei Wuxian experiences it as well, but he for sure does. His life was even more traumatic than theirs'. But then, one should never compare one's own grievances and sufferings to those of others. After all, everyone is different and things that can seem small to others can be of a big importance to someone else. That's also one of those things he learned with the passing of time.

He breathed a sigh of relief as the other man's breathing normalized. He leaned down and placed his head back on the pillow, then wiped the tears from his cheeks with his thumbs and placed a tender kiss on his forehead. He smiled sadly.

"I wish I could make you forget, so you wouldn't have to suffer so much." He laid down looking at Huaisang's face and caressed his shoulder, slowly closing his eyes in order to fall back to sleep.

When he fell asleep, Huaisang opened his eyes and looked at him with teary eyes. "I wish I could do the same for you," he thought.

***

Waking up was never Nie Huaisang's favourite thing in the world, especially after a restless night like this one, but he always woke up at the same time every day anyway. When it came to sleep he pretty much followed the same rules as Cloud Recesses residents, so his eyes always opened early in the morning, when from the outside you could still hear the concert of grasshoppers, birds and other animals.

Unfortunately, Huaisang couldn't say the same thing about his partner, who for sure wasn't an early bird. He covered the man with an extra blanket because this morning seemed unusually chilly and he didn't want him to catch a cold again.

He stood up from the bed and headed to his trunk, to grab some robes for the day. He opted for the black ones with a floral pattern embroidered with golden thread.

He dressed up and decided to take a short stroll before having his morning tea. He closed the door silently so as not to disturb his partner's sleep and went out. Huaisang liked this type of mornings, especially after a nightmare, when he could take a relaxing breath of fresh air during a walk and clear his thoughts. He was never too keen on meditating so this was a perfect solution.

Going along the rocky path Huaisang looked around and spotted a few bunnies running among tall grass. He smiled while approaching them. Taking a seat on a big boulder he sighed.

"I would love to be as carefree as you little ones," he said, taking one of them in his hands. "Life would be much easier then."

He gritted his teeth at the sudden sting of pain in his chest but remained calm. Life really sucks.

"Only one person can refrain you from being like that and that would be you," Huaisang jumped at the sudden intrusion and turned around.

The weak morning light allowed him to see the silhouette of the person who speaked but he still couldn't see his face. If it wasn't for the fact that this voice is so well engraved in his mind he would be wary of the man's presence.Wei Wuxian was leaning against a tree with his hands crossed on his chest. He sighed and came closer to where Huaisang was seated, so he proceeded to get up and stand in front of the man.

"Have I wandered so close to Jingshi? Forgive me, I didn't want to disturb your alone time." Huaisang said nervously, clasping his hands behind his back.

"Nah, it's me, who goes all around the place. Jingshi is quite a distance from here actually," Wuxian chuckled, but something about it seemed strange to Huaisang.

Maybe because he couldn't see those sparks in his eyes, like in the old times, but he wasn't sure, maybe it was a matter of lighting. After all, he is seeing him for the first time in almost three years.

"Lan Zhan mentioned something about your arrival during supper, but he also said not to bother myself with welcoming you till morning. He said you two were tired after the journey."

"Yes, well. You know I am not the one for this sort of things and my physical condition isn't the best lately."

"That's true. You always were kind of a lazy bum."

"I beg to differ. I can be as productive as all of you, just in a different way, doing my things in peace and quiet of my chamber."

It was nice. This mocking each other as if they were still closest of friends, as if nothing ever changed. But it did, and it did so irreversibly.

"Have you had your morning tea already? If not, then we can have it together. I am sure that Wangji is already awake," Wuxian proposed, cracking a soft smile.

Nie Huaisang nodded in agreement.

"Lead the way."