We need the old Kermit: Full Edition

Chapter 18

Kermit stood in front of his desk at the theater. He felt completely empty. Robin had helped, on the porch. But here, at the theater, it was different. This was what he was going to lose. This was his dream.

He could hear everyone getting ready. Beauregard and the rats were building sets, the Electric Mayhem was tuning up, and everyone else was scattered across the theater, memorizing lines and working out various issues. And he was at his desk, looking at the paperwork, trying to find his motivation. But it wasn’t there. He was empty.

“Yo, Kerm!” Clifford walked in with a huge stack of envelopes. “Got some mail for ya.” He set the pile on Kermit’s desk.

Kermit looked sadly at the pile. “Thanks, Clifford,” he said.

Clifford looked at the frog. He understood. “You okay, Kerm?”

Kermit nodded. “Yeah. Yeah, I’m fine.”

Clifford knew that Kermit wouldn’t talk unless he was ready. So he just shook his head. “You know, Kerm,” he said, “You usually have a pretty good poker face.” He walked away, leaving it at that.

Kermit examined the envelopes. An electric bill, a water bill, a phone bill, all demanding payment. Insurance wouldn’t be far behind. He slowly made his way to the bottom of the pile. There was a large manila envelope addressed to him. But there was no return address, and no stamp. Kermit opened the envelope and pulled out a single sheet of paper. “Dear Mr. Kermit the Frog...”

He started to read, slowly getting faster and faster. He tightened his grip on the paper and the envelope, shaking with excitement. 

“I’ve gotta tell everybody,” he said. “Hey guys!” he shouted. “Fozzie! Piggy! Scooter! Rowlf! Clifford! Everybody! ROBIN! Guys, come here!”

Scooter came running. “Boss?”

“Oh, Scooter! Good!” Kermit put a hand on Scooter’s shoulder, almost forgetting that he was still holding the envelope. “I want you to get everyone on stage right now. Got it?”

“I’m on it, Boss!” Scooter said.

Kermit ran up to the dressing rooms. He knocked on a door and pushed it open. “Piggy! Onstage! Now!”

“Oh! I’m coming, Kermie!” Miss Piggy said. But he was already at the next door.

“Robin!” Kermit shouted as he burst into the dressing room. “Onstage! Hurry!”

Robin hopped after Kermit with a huge smile on his face. He saw the letter and the envelope, but that wasn’t why he knew that his uncle was back.

Soon everyone was on the stage. They had pretty much figured out that Kermit had gotten the letter, but they pretended to be confused.

“Hey what’s goin’ down?” Floyd asked.

“Well Boss, we’re all here,” Scooter said.

Kermit had a huge smile on his face. He held up the paper so they could see it. “I got this letter in the mail today,” he said. “It doesn’t say who it’s from, but whoever it is, they really love us! Here, lemme read it to you.”

Robin smiled. He knew the letter by heart. Still, it was wonderful to see his uncle so enthused about something without knowing it was Robin’s.

“Dear Mr. Kermit the Frog,” Kermit read. “I am writing to try to tell you how much you and the Muppets have helped me. I do not know where I would be without you. Whenever I have felt like the whole world was against me, just watching any one of your productions has lifted my spirits more than enough to go on. When I feel like laughing, you are there to entertain me. When I feel like crying, you make me laugh anyway. You calm me down when I am nervous, angry, or afraid. And when I feel like I will never amount to anything, you remind me that any light can make a rainbow. I hope that you can understand how much you have entertained and inspired me and so many other people I know. I hope you can see how many lives you have touched, because it truly is amazing. Thank you for inspiring me to follow my star. I know it’s not easy being green, but it must be easier with a heart of gold like yours. So keep connecting your rainbows. The world is a better place because of it.”

Kermit looked up at his friends, still with a huge smile on his face. They smiled back at him. It was a wonderful letter, of course. They almost forgot it was fake, and they were honored to have been included. But mostly, they were just glad to have their Kermit back.

“That’s quite a letter, Boss,” Scooter said.

“Yeah,” Fozzie said as he put a hand on Kermit’s back. “And you know what, Kermit? Every word of it is true. I agree with it completely.”

“Me too,” Rowlf said. 

“ 316 percent,” Gonzo said.

The others were nodding.

Kermit had a pensive look on his face. “Do you... do you think we touch that many people, and... and that much?” he asked.

“Well sure Boss,” Scooter said. “102 countries have gotta mean something.”

Kermit thought about it. “I guess you’re right,” he said.

“Hey Kermin,” Pepe said. “Is dat de envelope de letter came in?”

“Yeah,” Kermit said, “Why do you ask?”

“Oh nothing,” Pepe said. “But it’s a lot for once piece of paper, hokay.”

Kermit opened the envelope as he spoke. “Well, I didn’t see anything else in-“ he looked inside. “...Here...” He ran to his desk and dumped a large pile of hundred-dollar bills out of the envelope. “Guys help me count,” he said.

Scooter had to smile. He had been counting that money over and over everyday for a week. But he stepped up to the desk and helped the others count it one more time.

“Five thousand dollars,” Bunsen finally announced.

“Wow!” Kermit said. He looked over the papers on his desk. “That’ll cover the bills, and the scenery, and the props, costumes, this is incredible!” He looked at the letter and picked it up. “Gee, I wonder who would send us five thousand dollars.”

The Muppets looked around at each other, nervously shifting their weight.

“Uh, it’s probably one of dose crazy fan site peoples, hokay,” Pepe said quickly.

Kermit shrugged. “Maybe,” he said. “I wonder who.”