How Do We Live?

Chapter 24: Diffusion

Content Warning: Mentioned of death and blood.

"Sino 'yang hampas lupa na 'yan? Bobo ba siya? Wala ba siyang utak? Nakanang!" hindi ko napigilan ang mapapikit ng marinig ang sunod-sunod na birada ni Annica sa harapan ko ngayon. Nang malaman kasi nila ang nangyari ay hindi na natigil ang galit niya. Her face is a bit red, her perfect arched brows are furrow, her eyes are burning and she keeps cursing.

"I know that some people will judge at first glance but that's just over board. Hindi porket may boyfriend ka at may kaibigan kang lalaki ay malandi ka na agad at nakikipagkalantari ka na agad sa iba." Maayos na suhestyon ni Aryanna bago sumimsim sa kape niya. Agad naman akong napabuntong hininga.

"Do you think that Vico will misunderstand my intention sa friendship namin? I mean I just want to be kind to him at least." Maayos na tanong ko sa kanila. Nagtama pa ang tingin nila bago tuluyang umiling ng sabay na parang dismayado.

"Malinaw naman yung intensyon mo. It's just friendship and kindness. Desisyon lang talaga ni Vico ang pagpayag. I just think you should be more sensitive with Vico's feeling. Hindi naman porket he's saying yes to you, eh he's not hurting himself in the process." saad ni Arya. Parang may kung anong tumarak sa dibdib ko ng sabihin niya iyon. Suddenly a flash of memories of me and Vico studying in the library or the unfaithful encounters we have played in my mind.

Hindi ko napigilan ang pagkalukot ng mukha dahil sa problema. I know, I was at fault at some point in this. Sobrang nakampante ako na my intentions towards this friendship is good while overlooking his feelings towards me. Hindi man niya direktang sinabi sa akin iyon ay dapat at some point, nakuha kong makiramdam. It's not entirely Vico's fault for agreeing. Hindi dapat siya naiipit sa sitwasyon kagaya nito.

The girl who said those words from that day said sorry to me at the end of the class, kahit pa labas sa ilong niyang sinabi iyon just for the sake of being civil with me ay tinanggap ko na lang din. I heard from one of the girl, Aisha, who told me the whole scenario why Vico is so upset that morning.

Naabutan daw ni Vico na pinag-uusapan ako ng iilang babae sa classroom namin. Them calling me names were a bit loud kaya naman rinig na rinig ni Vico. He glared at them with death in his eyes and they instantly shut up. Hindi man daw nagsalita si Vico, randam daw ng buong room ang tensyon dahil sa kanya. When I arrived ay halos mataranta daw si Aisha dahil nga sa nangyari. She eventually lecture the two girls that it is not there business to meddle with my love life and friendship towards Vico. Kung gusto daw nila maging kaibigan si Vico, just approach him. He's very kind and friendly!

Simula rin ng incident na iyon ay hindi na ulit kami nagkausap ni Vico. Whenever I try to approach him ay sobrang obcious na gusto niya akong iwasan kaya naman unconsciously akong umiwas na rin sa kanya. Rahim is even wondering what's up with me pero hindi ko naman masabi sa kanya ang problema.

"Alam mo Monique, hindi mo naman kailangan i-please lahat ng tao. I want you to proud and clear whenever you make a decision. This is you life and how you handle your relationships whether platonic or romantic is based solely on you. Kapag nakita ko talaga yung mga butiking nagsabing malandi ka dahil lang kinaibigan mo si Vico, sasakalin ko sila!" Hindi ko naman mapigilan ang matawa and be comforted by Annica's words.

"Sayang si Vico. Torpe kasi eh. If Rahim is not your boyfriend, I would really root for him. Kaso Rahim is just too perfect to begin with. Kung saan ka masaya naman Monique." Dugtong pa ni Aryanna.