Geek God and Xander Zee [ZaintSee]

Chapter 16(18+)

I could feel him penetrating me, I neither made a sound nor made a movement, I didn't even stop him. He started thrusting in and out, he wasn't rough, he kept his movements slow. He bent down while has still inside me and he kissed my mouth. He nibbled and pulled them, yet did not gain a reaction from me, he held my member and gave it a stroke, I did not do more than just look away.

"Saint... I don't like you being so silent," he said while thrusting, he started thrusting hard, it hit my prostate and only then I made a small sound, he continued to ram harder and liked the way I called his name.

"Ah... Zee, hmph..." He saw me struggling. He saw me letting him do everything. He did not like that. He pulled out and laid on his back.

I was confused, he didn't come yet, he never stopped mid-way. I looked at him, he urged me to get up, and I did. "Come ride me" he held my hand and pulled me to sit on his length. "I don't like you being silent Saint, please ride me" he was begging me, I couldn't handle my tears anymore, I made up my mind, and I know that he knows, probably this is the last time we're going to have sex with each other.

I gave him what he wanted, I inserted him in me, I started crying, it looked like I was crying because of the pain due to the penetration. But no, I was crying because of the pain in my heart, the pain of not being with him anymore.

He was fully inside me, I placed my hand on his chest and started moving, I kept bouncing and crying, he had started to cry too. We looked into each other's tear-filled eyes, I don't know if this is the most beautiful or painful breakup ever. I laid down and kissed him, both our faces were wet, I slowed down and that's when he started ramming from below. We both couldn't contain the sounds anymore, it was animalistic, it was hot.

We both came in unison with a loud groan, my cum was in between our bodies and he filled the rubber inside me. He pulled out and discarded it, while I laid on my back next to him. Heavy breathing was heard, both sticky with sweat and tired.

I don't know how but in mere minutes he was hard again, he rolled over, pulled me into a kiss again, but enough is enough, I can't have multiple last times, I'm prepared now and push him harshly, he doesn't let go.

"Zee, we need to talk" I finally say

"There is nothing to talk about" while kissing my face "you belong to me" more kisses "nothing can change that"

"Zee, just listen to me"

"No"

He started rubbing my groin, he noticed I wasn't hard yet, so he went down and blowed my length to make it hard. I couldn't resist that, I wanted to be relieved again, but I had to stop him. This was getting out of hand, he was forcing me now.

"Zee... Just wait"

"NOO... I will not" he punched the pillow next to me, he sat up and covered his face, and started sobbing.

I sat up and hugged him, he immediately hugged me back and held me tight. We both were lamenting, "I think we should let go of each other"

"No... No Saint please don't say that I can't live without you"

"Zee, I am your fan, we shouldn't have been together from the beginning, we need to be separated so that we can live peacefully"

"I don't care about anything, I just need you"

"You need to listen to me, are you going to let all that you have worked for just drop like that? You really wish to disappoint all your fans and do you wish to disappoint me?"

He looked into my eyes, "I'm disappointing you?"

"If you don't let me go you will" my voice cracked and my lips quivered. He just shook his head with fear and sadness.

"I can't let others decide what I feel about you, I can't let everyone else dictate our relationship, I don't want to be away from you"

"Zee... Do you love me?"

He nodded his head while sobbing

"Do you respect me?"

He did the same again but with more shaking.

"Would you respect my decision?"

More tears, more shaking, and more holding me tighter.

"I have taken the decision to let you go, if you love me and if you respect me you will agree to me, you will do that for me right?" I managed to say even though I could feel a hundred daggers piercing through my heart.

He did not use his words, but he nodded and he agreed. I'm relieved but also hurt and I know he is too. Seconds after that he kissed me again, he pushed me down on the bed again. His chest was touching my back and he started kissing my neck from behind. I started moaning and I was now fully hard again.

"Zee... Stop, enough" I said in between sobs.

"Please... One last time, let me do it, I'm begging you." I broke inside and out because of the way he pleaded with me, I never knew the guy I crushed on once upon a time only by looking at his picture, whom I would move ahead and love with my whole heart and experience that love to be returned in two folds, would now be begging me to let him make love to me one last time.

He was inside me in one thrust, and he did not stop until he had pumped everything he had into me, it was the saddest lovemaking ever.

After that, I fell asleep, for a while. When I woke up it was dark, I turned around to see him facing the other side, I knew he wasn't asleep, but he stayed quiet. I woke up and I felt my knees wobble and the soreness in my back. I made my way to the bathroom, every single time Zee would help me, but he did not this time and I was thankful for that. I closed the toilet seat down and sat on it and cried till I felt it was enough. To be honest, it wasn't entirely enough nor do I think it will ever be enough, I would never feel better. I stepped into the shower, memories of us showering together and being intimate in this very spot flashed in front of my eyes, I used my hand to close my eyes and I cried even more under the flowing water.

I changed and grabbed a few of my stuff, I went to the room to see him one last time, I knelt and saw his face, tears kept flowing but his eyes were shut, he was pretending to sleep, I know he wouldn't be strong enough to tell me goodbye and that why he is pretending, I caressed his head and brushed few strands of hair to reveal his forehead, I bend down and kissed it, he clutched the pillow handful and moved his face and buried it in the pillow and sobbed, but his eyes were still closed.

"Goodbye, I love you" saying that I ran out without looking back, I kept crying all the way down to the basement, when the lift door opened, I saw Day waiting for me. "Day... What are you doing here?" I asked in a hoarse voice.

"I'm here to pick you up, Zee asked me to do it so that you reach home safely without the paparazzi spotting you," he said and opened the door of the passenger seat for me.

I kept silently shedding tears all the way, Day handed me a whole box of tissues and kept silent for a while. Then he said

"I am sorry"

"It's not your fault, don't blame yourself for anything"

"..."

"He cared about me, even after I broke up with him, he wanted me to be safe," I said

"He still cares about you, and he always will" Day was sad too.

"You know, I never told him that I love him, and when I did I was leaving him, I hate myself, even more, to say that to him while leaving"

The rest of the ride was silent and I reached my old condo, I went in to see the darkroom, and broke down again, I was back in my dark lonely cave.