Show Me the Stars - Jennifer Jareau x Reader

five | emily's plan

Emily knew how to disguise her number, and it's not like the bar was going to trace it anyway. She just didn't want Levi to recognize it. "What's that dumb girl's name?" Emily asked before dialing. "The one who flirts with Levi at the bar?"

"Clarissa," you said.

"Thanks. I realized I have no idea what she sounds like, so make some noise like we're pregaming and I'll be her tipsy friend calling to see if he's there." She pressed the button and put the phone to her ear.

"Emily, what—!" you hissed. That was sudden, you were not ready for that! Nevertheless, you and JJ started giggling like drunk sorority girls and fake chatting with buzzed incoherence in the background.

"Hey, is this the bar where Levi works?" Emily slurred in a voice reminiscent of a valley girl, even getting the laugh down. She was quiet for a moment before giggling, "Clarissa, c'mon! He's cute! Why wouldn't you want me to?"

More quiet from her as you and JJ laughed and fake whine-argued as background noise.

"Oh, alright, well, we're already pretty 'prudink' — prunk— drunk! So I dunno if we're gonna go tonight. But she'll call you sometime, Cute Levi From The Bar! Love you-bye!"

Once Emily hung up the car went silent. You all burst out laughing after a tense moment.

"God, that's so bizarre, what the fuck?" Emily exclaimed. "But he's at work, so let's get in and get out of your house. Make sure you get anything you could possibly need, alright?"

All of you went in with a mission. You grabbed anything you needed or wanted out of there that you could conceivably take.

Birth certificate. Social Security card. Passport. Your wallet, which contained everything except your credit cards. You had joint accounts, so Levi had taken the cards when you left and kept them with him.

You took your accordion folder of financial and medical folders. You knew there was another copy around somewhere, but you only took one. It had both yours and Levi's papers in it. Tax records, insurance policies, et cetera.

You truly had no clue where the house or car paperwork was. Levi kept those so you couldn't get out. Other things, the things you took, were either too mundane or too frequently used to hide from you.

You grabbed your bottle of Zoloft, which you hadn't been able to take for the past few days and it was causing you a serious headache.

You took some personal effects and practical items: your phone charger and earbuds, photo albums, toothbrush, your favorite necklace. You also grabbed what was left of the loaf of banana bread you'd made five days prior. It was damn good, and you needed something familiar, even if it was stupid.

You all were out in fifteen or twenty minutes. Emily dropped you and JJ off at the latter's house. JJ helped you take everything inside and get it sorted out. At long last, she sat on the couch and turned on the TV, putting a blanket over herself and patting her now-covered lap.

"C'mere, love. Can I play with your hair?"

You put your head in JJ's lap and she didn't say anything for quite a while. She played with your hair and hummed hoarsely. You watched TV with your eyes but not your mind.

"Love, I think we should go to bed. You're kind of falling asleep. Are you still okay to sleep in bed with me? If you're not, that's totally fine,"

"Um, I...I think I'll be okay. It's your bed, too, Jayje,"

"I don't care about that. Nothing's gonna happen to you, I'm not gonna do anything you're not okay with. I want you to be one hundred percent comfortable, love. Okay?"

"Mhm,"

"Okay. So are you sure you're alright with me sleeping next to you tonight?" You nodded and kissed her cheek, very slowly. You felt her smile.

"I think so. Yeah. I love you, JJ,"

"I love you too." JJ smiled and rubbed your back. You went upstairs together and got ready for bed. As you brushed your teeth, JJ kissed your forehead and smiled at you. She could always comfort you perfectly.

When you were just about to get into bed, you froze in place, standing in front of the bed JJ was already in.

Your brain assailed you with memories of what he'd done to you. It seemed to be bouncing around the timeline of your relationship with Levi. And god, you wanted to hate him, and you did, but not with the heat and vitriol you normally had to mute. You couldn't conjure that. It was instead a sad pain, it made your body ache and you became hollow.

Your girlfriend furrowed her brow in concern. "Baby?"

"I..."

She got up to take your hands in hers. "Hey, hon, you're safe here. Y/N. I love you, and Levi can't hurt you. Are you sure you want to sleep with me?"

"Please stay..." you breathed heavily. JJ didn't want to touch you too much in fear of making it worse. But you snaked your arms around her body, needing her comfort. It was almost embarrassing.

"Y/N, I'm here. We're alone, it's just you and I. You're safe now. You're gonna be okay. Shh, honey, I love you. I'm here now,"

"JJ..."

"Y/N, I got you. Come sit, alright?"

"Uh-huh," you cried. JJ nodded and took you to sit on the bed. "Please..."

"Shh, okay. I'm keeping you safe. You are doing so good, love. It's hard. It's so hard, I know, love, you've been through a lot, and it's valid to be hurting. Just sit, and breathe with me." She led you through several deep breaths to calm down. "That's good. Really good, love. How are you feeling?"

"Um...b...better?"

"Don't worry. There's not a right answer. I want to know how you feel, love. So I can help you. I'd never, ever want to hurt you,"

"I know," you wept, nodding. JJ's hand on your back felt so nice.

"It's okay. Your brain might...be scared, that someone else'll hurt you like he has, and I have no idea how scary that is, my love, but I really do love you,"

"I love you, JJ...please don't..."

She waited for a moment to hear what you were going to say, but when you trailed off, she asked, "'Don't' what, my love? It's okay,"

"Don't leave..." you sobbed. You leaned against JJ and cried, and she repeatedly kissed the top of your head. "Please don't leave me, Jay,"

"Of course not, honey. I'll never, ever leave you."

JJ sat there and held you until you were ready to sleep. Your girlfriend was the love of your life. Not Levi.