✓ | Forget-Me-Not ~ Fili FanFiction / Hobbit FanFiction / Fili FF

「 Chapter 50 」

The ceremony was over.
It took some time for all the dwarfs to leave the great hall.
Dain prepared the feast in honor of Thorin Oakenshield.
The former company had also walked up the steps to begin the festivities, Gandalf had gone with them, Beorn and Radagast had meanwhile left the Erebor.
Before he went upstairs with the others, Bilbo had carefully approached Ilèyn, who, with a fixed look and without moving, was still standing where she was at the end of the ceremony.
"I'm going to leave." he had said to her "Before the feast, now, immediately. Gandalf will come with me."
Ilèyn had looked up at him and slowly nodded.
"I'm not very good at saying goodbye." she had then admitted.
Then Bilbo had stepped closer and hugged her briefly. He had been careful not to cause further pain in her shoulder.
"Someday you will return home too." he had said.
"Farewell, Bilbo." Ilèyn had answered quietly as they both broke out of the embrace.
"May happiness be with you on every step you take from now on." Bilbo had said, then turned quickly and left the hall in a hurry.
Now Ilèyn was standing alone next to the three pedestals. Nobody else was there anymore, the hall was bathed in a strange silence, which was by no means uncomfortable. Ilèyn closed her eyes and concentrated.
Verily. No sound could be heard, even though the preparations for a huge feast were in progress.
For a long time she stood rigid in the semi-darkness, alone, her hood on and shrouded in silence. She didn't know what to do.
She stepped slowly up to the pedestal on which Fili was lying, put her arms on the edge and watched at the dwarf's face for a long time. The candles were still lit, but they were slowly burning out.
"You know..." Ilèyn began softly and felt the lump in her throat. "To be honest, I never assumed that anything could ever become so important to me in life." Ilèyn's voice broke and she tried to swallow the grief.
"But you did and I only have one request to you..." She didn't try to keep the tears from leaving her eyes and hadn't turned her gaze from Fili.
"Please..." she said "don't be... dead."
The last words were more of a breath than Ilèyn had actually uttered them. Ilèyn took a deep breath before heavy sobs caught her body.
"I... can't stay here." she said softly after she had collected herself to some extent "I'll have to go, I hope you understand..." She paused for a moment and listened to the silence around her.
"Since I have no intention of ever going back..." Ilèyn paused and frowned when she saw something that must have been pinned to Fili's coat while he was being prepared for the ceremony. She hadn't noticed the little Forget-me-not before because of the tears in her eyes, but the little flower was stuck between the fabric of the dwarf's heavy coat.
Ilèyn's gaze rested for a while on the flower, then she carefully reached for it, took the Forget-me-not and looked at it. The flower had dried up, but it still had the characteristic blue hue and was beautiful to look at.

Ilèyn smiled weakly and took the flower.
She decided to leave the hall. She turned to the steps and took a few of them. When she turned around one last time and looked at Fili, Kili and Thorin, the last candles had gone out.
Ilèyn climbed the innumerable steps until she reached the exit of the hall. She looked around in all directions, there were no dwarfs to be seen, everyone had gone into the ballroom. Here, further up, Ilèyn could quietly hear the noises of the preparations. She moved away from it and went down the passage she had come with Bilbo and Balin. Her face strained as the pain in her thigh was beginning to bother her, she looked for the infirmary door. It took the archer something to find the right door. She pushed it open to enter the room and looked around for her weapons. These lay neatly next to each other, her bow, her quiver with arrows, her daggers, her knife and the belt with the pouches attached to it. Ilèyn crossed the room until she was standing in front of one of the medicine cabinets. She opened the cupboard and looked through the many different ampoules and vials that were neatly lined up inside. She read through some of the labels on it and took what she needed and found convenient.
She walked to her belt, tucked the vials in one of her leather pockets, and checked the other small pouches. In each one was still contained that which had also been in it before. Reassured, Ilèyn put her belt on after pulling on her doublet and fastening the buckles tightly. She ignored the pain in her shoulder.
When she took off her coat for a moment, she held it in front of her and looked at it. The cloak was no longer usable after the sword cut.
Ilèyn sighed softly and folded it down on the floor. She picked up her knife, stowed it away, and took her daggers in the holders so that they could be carefully attached to her back.
After tightening her boots and making sure she hadn't left anything in the infirmary, she slowly opened the door and peered into the corridor.
Furthermore, no one was to be seen, she only heard the soft complaints of the other injured, who were lying in the infirmary rooms next to her.
Ilèyn stepped into the corridor and closed the door behind her, making sure that the heavy wood fell into the lock as quietly as possible.
Limping slightly, she made it through the long corridor and a little later reached the front entrance hall, where she had been standing with everyone a few hours ago. The sunlight that fell in from outside was clouded by the dust that was floating in the air, but the day was unusually warm for a day in the north. Before she reached the exit of the Mountain, Ilèyn noticed several wooden chests that were placed side by side against the wall.
Bilbo's words echoed in her mind.
"Someday you will return home too."
Reluctantly, she opened one of the heavy wooden chests. The lid creaked loudly as it flipped back.
A dusty cloak. Coins. Letters. Rusty nails.
At least a few useful things.
She threw the cloak over her shoulders, put the money in her pockets and disappeared outside.
Was it worth it?
What was still anything worth...?
Her hand slided into her leather doublet. She felt something ... soft, very small in her hand.
Slowly she pulled it out and eyed it. The little crushed blue flower.
Forget-Me-Not.
"I will never forget you."

Ilèyn was relieved that no one had seen her leave the Mountain. She took a step on the plains and saw that much of the battle could already be removed. In spite of everything, Ilèyn's gaze fell directly on the corpses of orcs and dwarves, which were still scattered in front of the Mountain. Due to the warmth there was a very unpleasant smell in the air and Ilèyn wanted to leave this place behind as quickly as possible.
Looking straight ahead, with the intention of not having to look down as much as possible, Ilèyn walked across the plains, which were criss-crossed by the scars of battle, of death and silence.
When Ilèyn saw Dale inquiring next to her, she toyed with the idea of ​​going into the town to see how the people were doing, how Sigrid and Tilda, Bain and Bard were doing. She paused briefly and her gaze rested on the towers with round roofs, glowing yellow in the sunlight. Now that she thought about it a second time, Ilèyn dismissed the thought again. She should and had to focus on her own future now.
She didn't know where to go yet.
She didn't know how best to start over.
She didn't know whether she would get and accept help with this.
As she walked the last part of the plains, she considered Thranduil's offer.
He had made her understand that she still had a home. Always had a home. But Ilèyn knew that she could never feel at home there. She also knew that Thranduil had expected this very decision, but he had still considered it important to let her know that from now on she was always welcome.
Ilèyn was still unsure whether this was a final peace offer.
She didn't really want to waste another thought and thought about the direction in which it would pull her.
In fact, she was sure of it from the beginning.
North.
She would go North.