Scared Of Heights | Harry Edward Styles

54: Harry meets Harlow

HARRYS POV
"Good morning"

My eyes opened and I saw my lover sitting on her desk smiling.
"How did y' know I was up?" I asked.
"I know you. How're you feeling?"
"Better than yesterday. How long have I been sleeping?" I pondered as she climbed in beside me.
"Uhh...since 3Pm yesterday"

I SLEPT FOR 16 HOURS?

"Oh god. Im sorry baby it was our anniversary yesterday and I slept" I sighed.
"It's okay! When I'm back from uni we can start celebrating" She kissed my head and pulled me into her arms.
"You look so pretty"
"Thank you my love. This dress makes my tits look good"

For once she said something nice about her body...she really was doing well today.

"You look so gorgeous baby" I kissed her lips gently, a smile on each of our faces.
"I love you" She nudged our noses together and pressed her hands against my cheeks. "I gotta get to uni soon but maybe I can order us breakfast?"

I was so in love with her. Sweet, caring, gentle...I wanted to just kiss her all over.

"I'd love that darling. Gimmie 10 minuets, I'll get ready"
"Okay, i love youuu" My gorgeous girl gave me a sweet kiss on my lips before bouncing out of bed and dashing off.
"You have a cute butt" I called.
"Shut up!"

I loved seeing her happy.

I slid out of bed and hopped in the shower, a grin on my face. I heard clattering from the kitchen so I hurried up before changing and quickly rushing to the kitchen to see my darling angel on the floor crying.

She had the worst mood swings.

"Whats the matter love?" I asked her, kneeling down beside her.
"I-i need to change my outfit" She sniffled, not looking at me.
"Why would y' do that? You look pretty" I replied.
"i-i don't look right"
"Okay c'mere darling" I picked her up and pulled her onto my lap, my hands on her cheeks so she looked at me. "Baby I think you have body dysmorphia" Lavender had spoken to me and I'd done my own research so it was my only conclusion.
"Yeah I know"

What the fuck!?

"W-why didn't you tell me?" I stammered.
"Im embarrassed" She whimpered.
"Oh darling theres nothing embarrassing about it! You're safe with me, you can talk about anything to me. No judgement"
"Thats a Niall Horan song" I forgot he was her favourite in the band...
"And it proves to be right" I added.
"Okay...uhm I still wanna change though"
"You will still look very pretty" I kissed her forehead gently before she climbed off me and went to her room.

She returned wearing one of my sweaters and some big jeans - it hurt me that she didn't like how she looked but what could I do? I couldn't automatically fix it or anything but I did remind her everyday that she was gorgeous - because she was. The first day we met I couldn't stop staring at her when she fluffed out her hair or effortlessly pulled down the lever on her badge maker. Even now I do the same: I watch her do her make up and sleep. When she laughs, I smile. Her small hands, her brown eyes...everything about her was perfect. She hated having her photo taken, hearing her voice in a video and her messy hair but I loved all of it.

"I like your clothes. Maybe I should steal more" She joked, ruffling my hair.
"Go ahead" I chuckled, getting up to join her as she went to get a glass of water.
"Stop following me you whore"
"Hey!" I scolded her, getting some fruit out of the fridge. "Im making us a fruit salad"
I knew her favourite fruit. She couldn't keep away.
"Okay" She gave in and downed her water before throwing the cup in the sink and going to find the docs I bought her for our one month. "I love you thank you for the docs"
"Thank you for existing" I smiled. "And for the docs. I love you too" Yeah, she got me a pair of my own so we'd match.

I watched her slide on her new shoes and noticed she had three pairs of socks on. Ah, breaking them in. I rushed over to tie her laces whilst she watched me, snapping photos.
"You're such a sweetheart" She said dreamily.
"Thank you darling" I chuckled, helping her up once I'd finished.
"Oh god I gotta leave soon" She saw the time and rushed to the kitchen and shoved a watermelon cube in her mouth whilst I put some in a container.
"I'm gonna go get you some more milk love, dyou need anything else?" I asked her.
"Uhhhh...vodka"

Fuck no.

"Hey, no drinking during the week" I scolded her. 
"Why not!?" She protested.
"It effects your performance in class. I'll get you a pink monster if you want though"
"Okay uhh monster, more strawberries, some vegan butter aaaand...an underrated debut album"
"Very funny love" I scoffed playfully.
"Okay, gum then. Thank you. Gimmie a kiss" She stood on the chair and pecked my lips gently but I picked her up and her legs swung round my waist. "You're such a sap"
"I know but I love you" I chuckled, our foreheads pressed together.
"I love you too handsome" She giggled, pressing our lips together.

After a saucy make out session, I walked my girl to the bus stop before Delilah and Lavender came to pick her up. She gave me a massive hug, kissed under my ear and sauntered off with her friends who were giggling at how affectionate we were.

I walked down the aisle trying to find the right milk - I was trying to try alternative options whilst Zahra was lactose intolerant. I selected Oat and dropped it into the basket before going to find the energy drinks.
"Oi, you Harry?" A deep voice spoke. I turned my head to see a familiar boy with scruffy black hair and lots of piercings.
"Uh yeah?"
"'m Harlow. And I need to talk to you. It's about Zahra" he replied.

What the fuck?

"So uh...how d'you know Zahra?" I asked timidly. We were sat in Pret a Manger, Americanos in front of us.
"We were best friends for ages. Then she fucked off here and didn't speak to me again. Ghosted much?" Oh god, I was already terrified. How was I meant to reply? He knew Zahra from wayyy back,,I'd known her for months.
"Dude its fine if you dunno what to say. I'm just tired of her and you deserve to know the truth. 'm jus gonna talk and you can listen. Ask shit if you want"

The truth?

This felt wrong. Was i breaking her trust? She told me to be patient. What was going on? Maybe this was all some stupid joke?

"Has she ever mentioned her parents to you?"
"Uh...no. Not really"
"Ah. They fucking suck. Abused the shit out of herz They dont give a shit about her. They didn't want her to come here but she did it anyway. No wonder shes fucking borderline"
"Borderline?" The thought of Zahra being abused left my head when I heard that word.
"Borderline Personality Disorder. She got diagnosed before she went uni. Along with depression, anxiety, PTSD, body dysmorphia..."
"Oh. Uh yeah she told me about her body dysmorphia this morning"
"You've known her how many months?"
"Six months?"
"Six months and she only just told you she hates her body?"
"I wouldn't force her to tell me anything"
"Yeah but its some mental problem-"
"I wouldn't call it that"
"You ever wonder why shes so unstable? Her parents fucked her up, she got bullied, found out she was trans-"
"Wait, what?" Confusion was written all over my face at this point.
"Her...not even her. Their. They changes their name to Cherry"
"I...how do I know any of this is even right?"
"I was afraid you'd say that. Here" He slid his phone across the table. "Go on. Take your time"

It was he and Zahras text messages conversations. It pretty much confirmed he was telling the truth.

"We were gonna transition together but she fucked off and left. Ghosted me"
"But why? Zahra hates being ghosted, she wouldn't do the-mother fucker" I realised what was going on. "What did you do to her?"
"Wh-why you turnin' this on me for!? She fucked me over!"
"She wouldn't have if you hadn't hurt her! You must have done something"
"What? Helped her find out who she was? Support her when she came crying to me that her Mum upset her? Take her to see a doctor? I helped her. More than you ever did"

"Harry? Is that you?" Zahras sweet voice called as I entered and put her groceries on the table. I heard her door open and she stepped out, her make up off.
"Are you okay baby?" She'd noticed I'd been crying - truth be told I did cry.
"Uh yeah I'll be fine. I just...uh I need to speak to you" I sniffled, not looking at her even though I knew she looked terrified.
"Uh w-what about?"

I turned around and looked her dead in the eye.
"I met your friend Harlow"