Our First Sunset (A Novelette)

Chapter 10-Letter

Letter

Deafening silence ate my system.

Tears just can't stop falling.

My heart can't stop breaking into pieces.

I wish I was numb at this moment of my life.

How?

Why?

Did I deserve this?

It was supposed to be a happy day.

It was our happy day!

But how come....it ended up this way?

"Ash," Klea called my name for the nth time but it feels like I didn't hear anyone. "Please be strong. You have to face this. I'm sorry."

Tears fell again non-stop. I was still standing in front of a morgue of the city hospital. I don't know how long I've been standing here and it seems like my feet were glued on the floor. I just can't move because of the pain I'm having inside.

How could I accept this truth? How could I live another day with this unfortunate memory?

"Ash, we know that this is really hard for you. Tita Alia and your mom were worried. Kanina pa sila nagbabalak na kausapin ka but you looked blank. Naglakas loob na nga akong lapitan ka. I know hindi madali na tanggapin ito pero kailangan eh. I'm sorry. You didn't deserve this." Klea said while hugging me from behind and crying on my shoulder.

Wala na akong nagawa kungdi mas lalong humagulgol. Hindi ko alam kung paano tatanggapin ang lahat. Masakit na nitong umaga lang eh nakatanggap ako ng tawag na di ko inaasahan.

"K-klea..." namamaos kong sambit matapos ang ilang oras na wala akong nahagilap na salita. "Kasama ko siya kagabi. He was there... he visited me. Pa-paano ako maniniwalang nandiyan siya?" tanong ko habang hilam pa rin ang luha sa mga mata.

Klea just stared at me with pity on her eyes. She shook her head sadly and embrace me more.

"You're hallucinating... he met an accident at around ten in the evening. You said that he talked to you at 11:30. Paano nangyari 'yon? I guess you're dreaming, Asha."

Paulit-ulit akong umiling, ayaw siyang paniwalaan. Kumalas ako mula sa pagkakayakap niya at tumayo nang tuwid. Bagama't hinang-hina pa rin ang aking tuhod ay nagawa ko pa ring maglakad papasok ng morgue. Nakita ko doon sina mama at Tita Alia maging ang ilan nilang kamag-anak. Sinalubong nila ako ng mga tingin na puno ng awa at lungkot.

"Asha..." ang aking ina ang unang nagsalita na kaagad akong dinaluhan.

"Ma... dapat po nasa wedding tayo ngayon 'di ba?" I asked with tears on my cheeks.

"Anak ko... patawad, anak ko.."

My mother cried loudly while caressing my back. She consoled me for a couple of minutes. Tita Alia went beside me and hugged me tightly. I cried again.

Tila hindi na ako nauubusan ng luha sa mga oras na 'to. I just want to disappear and wish that everything is just a dream. If only I can change what happened.