Our Flame

iii

NADIA

"What's wrong, красивая?" Mama asks seven year old me. (beautiful)

I hiccup, trying to find my words, "Papa pushed me." I show her the forming bruise on my knee. She takes my face in her hands giving me a sad smile.

"Nadia, your papa is a confusing man and for that I'm so sorry."

"But it's not your fault." I tilt my head. "Be better than me, Nadia." She says."But I don't understand Mama." I pout.

"When you have a family of your own- never allow someone to dim your light, never let a man destroy you or your heart, and most importantly never ever settle."

"My light?" I question. Mama nods. "There's a fire in you Nadia serving as a light. You and Niko are proof that there's always a light after the darkness."

"Never lose your flame by igniting someone else's."

"Nadia." Niko calls shaking me from my thoughts.

I clear my throat and realize it's just me and him on the plane now. "You completely zoned out, are you alright?"

"Of course." I assure grabbing my things before following him off the plane. "Here." He hands me a cigarette. I chuckle. "These will kill you, Nik."

"No one calls me Nik anymore, besides we all die Nadia. Might as well do it right." Niko hands me the lighter. I shake my head as I light it.

"Here's to dying right."

"Should I have even given you a lighter?" Niko jokes. "What? Are you scared I'll burn you, брат"

translation: brother

"And I'll call you Nik if I want to." I roll my eyes. "Whatever."

"Seriously you both shouldn't smoke." Luka groans. Nik and I open our mouths, "I don't care that we all die."

I then open my mouth again to ask where everyone else is but I stop as I'm engulfed in a hug. "It's rude that I didn't get a hug earlier, Nadia." Vadim tells me as I pull away.

"I missed you V." I honestly tell him. It's so hard to be mad at them for not getting me back sooner. They're the only family I have left, I shouldn't push them away.

Right?

"Hey." I yell as Vadim slaps the cigarette out of my hand. I look over at Niko and his is also on the ground now. Luka clears his throat. "You didn't tell me you missed me."

"That's because she didn't, you asshole." Nik rolls his eyes. I laugh and go to hug Luka. "I did miss you, a lot."

I missed all of them, including Aleksi. I hated being with my father. No matter what I did something was always my fault, nothing was ever enough.

He'd force me to train, if I didn't there'd be consequences. It was miserable and it felt never ending but it did end, I'm back where I should be.

I'm pulled away from my brothers when Gianna grabs my arm. She stares at me for a moment. "The past seven years weren't kind to you either, were they?"

"That's a pretty random question, G." I joke trying to get out of this conversation. She gives me a serious look and I sigh.

The past seven years I've built walls around myself, walls that I swore I'd never let down but maybe it's time to try.

Maybe I don't have to be strong all the time anymore.

I shake my head and she pulls me into a hug. "My mother died." I pull away from her. "What...When?"
Gianna gives me a sad smile, "A few weeks after yours."

Instead of giving her a generic apology, I hug her again. Never wanting to let go.

The pain of losing a parent is the absolute worst. You don't know how to move on, because the person who once taught you everything is gone.

"We'll be okay." I tell her. "I never doubted it." I smile at her response. "I know you aren't going to be the same but it's so nice to have my best friend back."

"Can you guys stop hugging and get in the car." Niko yells. Gianna and I roll our eyes.

**

The car is dead silent, I think I can actually hear Niko breathing.

Viktor is driving the car occasionally looking back at me, Vadim is seated in the passenger seat on his phone, and Niko is seated with in the back on my left side while Gianna is on the right.

Everyone thought it'd be best if Aleksi was in another car. Which it is, this is peaceful.

It's nice to be next to my best friend and twin again, but I have no space. "Let's play a game." I suggest. Everyone looks at me.

"Start a conversation or I light this car on fire, with us in it."

Viktor laughs while Vadim starts talking about the company. "You don't even have a lighter." Niko says. I pull the lighter from earlier out of my pocket and smile while his eyes widen.

"So Vadim and Viktor, you both run the company?" I ask. "Someday you'll run it Nadia, everything will be yours." Viktor tells me. I smile at my older brother.

"We're here."

I look out the window; the house is the same but you can tell they've expanded it. They've made it their own, instead of it just being our father's first house.

It looks good, last time I was here there was blood everywhere so as long as that's gone it's fine.

After grabbing my things I walk to the front door and just stand there, almost afraid to walk in.

"Ты никогда не будешь один"

translation: you'll never walk alone

"It'll be fine, Nadia." Niko assures me while grabbing my hand. "When did you get so sappy?" I tease. "Shut up, I'm just glad you're back."

Together, we walk through the door. It's the same, less blood obviously. But the house has remained beautiful throughout all the horrors its endured.

Part of me is glad my brothers didn't move, this house built us, shaped us into who we are.

"Welcome home, Nadia."

**
Nadia isn't crazy, she enjoys fire, that's all.
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